Finally (Gay Romance)

Chapter One- Him

The bell rung right when I was starting to enjoy myself. The worst period of all was next. Lunch, the period I dreaded. None of my friends were in my period they were all in the period before this. I had lunch the worst period because I took a lot of advanced classes. Since I was in those classes and there were only certain periods that they were taught my entire schedule had to be configured around them. I hoped that after high school taking the advanced classes would all be worth it.

I got my lunch and sat down. Sometimes I wonder if the people that served the food would even eat it. I always sat by myself because everybody in the school hated me for being gay. It's so stupid that people are so judgmental. Everyone says being yourself is great and you should never hide who you truly are, but sometimes you don't become happy from doing it. It dosen't always have a positive outcome.

For lunch today were tacos. I loved tacos; they were probably one of my favorite foods. The school gave us meat and cheese. There wasn't even lettuce or salsa or anything. But a taco is a taco right? Even if the meat your eating probably isn't even meat, the cheese tastes horrible, and the taco shell disenegrates in your hand, it's still a taco.

After I was done eating I started reading. I was in my world reading Perks of Being a Wallflower. It was one of my all time favorite books. I had read it at least four times already. I was always so warped into it like it was another world and I was experiencing everything that the characters experienced, and felt everything they felt. I felt as if everything that happened was happening right in front of me. "OW! Who just threw that?" I yelled after a piece of an orange hit my back. What did that orange ever do to them anyways?

"Go find somebody who actually cares about you and your gayness!" someone from the popular table said.

Did he really just say gayness? Somebody needs to go and reevaluate their life. Honestly I always thought that guy was gay. That just made me know that he was.

I looked over there to figure out who might've thrown the orange at me, then I saw one of the hottest guys in school, Ryan. Ryan was probably the most absolutely perfect guys I had ever seen. He had defined cheek bones, and a perfect white smile. He played football and baseball and did track so he had nice abs, a nice butt, and amazing legs and arms, and he also wasn't a douche to me like everyone else. Ryan looked at me and I saw his gorgeous blue eyes (did I mention his eyes are gorgeous?).

Wait did Ryan just look at me? Did we just have eye contact for more than one second? My heart was beating uncontrollably fast. He was probably looking at how much of a nerd I was and then I calmed down. I didn't really have anything to be happy for anyways. Right? He was probably looking at how I'm weak and don't stand up for myself. But honestly I would stand up for myself if I knew it would be me fighting one guy, not me fighting all of the popular people. Because honestly I wasn't as weak as I looked. I had pretty nice abs and my arms may have looked scrawny but I went to the gym.

Then I was brought back to reality with a huge taco labelled 'James face express' on it. I dodged it then ran out of the lunch room feeling like a complete loser. This happens on a daily basis. It was one of the most horrible feelings in the world. People tell me they know how I feel but I know that they don't. Nobody that I talk to has to go through the things I went through.

There weren't many other gay guys in the school. I knew there were some people but they had never come out or anything. I guess that I was the only idiot who had thought that coming out would present other people in doing the same thing. But I had only come out in the beginning of the school year. The school year was now halfway over so I guess I still had to have hope.

I went through the rest of the day just feeling worn out. I didn't want to do anything or talk to anyone. "Are you ready to go?" Jake asked from behind me nearly giving me have a heart attack. He would always do that and I would always get scared.