Poker Face | Bruce Wayne

thirty nine

If Meredith's eyes could roll out of her head they would be doing so. "You know, there's a lot of choice words I'd use to describe you, but diplomatic is not one of them."

"Tt." He tutted as he scanned the room, eyes landing on the other woman and nodding at her in a greeting. "Lane."

Lois seemed utterly amused by the whole situation. "Hello, Damian. Great to see you again."

"I'm sure it is."

"Anyway," Meredith said, exasperated, as she cleared her throat. "Is there something I can help you with, Damian?"

"Yes, actually. I've come to inquire about this 'party' you are allegedly hosting at my house. I was hoping it was all a farce, but judging by the state of this office, I, unfortunately, have my answer."

Meredith sighed. "This wasn't by my own doing. Lois is trying to find us appropriate to wear to the event."

Damian strolled over to the couch, hands clasped behind his back, and gingerly picked up the playboy bunny costume Lois was trying to market earlier. He raised a brow. "Since when is dressing like a prostitute appropriate?"

Meredith flashed Lois an 'I told you so' look.

The reporter huffed, snatching the costume out of Damian's hand. "You are too young to even know what a prostitute is, much less attend the party! There will be alcohol, you know."

"I have a rather high tolerance to most alcoholic substances."

"And that is, like... really illegal on so many levels— what is wrong with your father?!"

Anger snapped across his face. "My father does not—!"

"Damian." Meredith reprimanded.

The boy rolled his eyes and fell back onto one of the couches, crossing his arms. "If you must know, Grayson is forcing me to go, and is also trying to get me to dress up as a... cat... in a hat?"

"Yes!" Lois snapped her fingers. "Thank you! Finally, someone who knows Doctor Seuss!"

Damian looked puzzled. "What is this Seuss a doctor of? Is he the cardiologist at Gotham General?"

Meredith chuckled at the look on Lois' face. "No, that's Doctor Suez, head of cardiology. Doctor Seuss is a popular children's book author."

"I see." Damian nodded slowly. "Why would I want to pay homage to him with a costume?"

"My point exactly," Meredith said.

"Ugh! This is impossible!" Lois threw her hands up. "Seriously, neither of you have ever read The Cat in the Hat?"

Meredith hummed. "Again, Ludwig von Mises, you should really check him out."

"Ah, yes, his treatise on economics— Human Action," Damian noted. "I thought it was thoroughly informational and incredibly well-written."

Meredith smirked, eyeing him pointedly. "Every day I like you more and more."

The boy gave her one of his rare smiles, his shoulders bristling proudly.

Lois scoffed from next to her. "I hate you people."

* * *

"I look so sexy."

Bruce glanced at the blond in annoyance. Oliver paid no mind to the dirty look being thrown his way, instead enamored with staring at himself in the full-body mirror.

"Like, really! I mean, c'mon. I think I rock this costume better than when I was seventeen!"

The archer was dressed in a white, button-up shirt, collar open and sleeves rolled to his elbows. Nestled in his mess of blond hair was a crooked, sparkly golden halo.