I Never Stopped | ongoing

Chapter 10 | Heating Pad

"I'm sorry Sage. I hope you feel better."

"Thanks," I express as I lay my head on my backpack that's resting on the table.

Margot and I sit in silence until Peyton arrives and asks me the same question that Margot did.

"What's up with you?" Peyton asks.

"She's had a rough morning," Margot informs.

"Really? I thought it would be a good one since today is Sawyer and the boys first day here," she states. I groan at the reminder and slam my head on the table for being an idiot and forgetting.

I didn't even send Sawyer a text to wish him good luck on his first day here either. I'm a horrible friend.

"Why today, Universe? Why today?" I complain. "I look and feel like shit. This day just keeps getting better and better."

"You're not excited to see Sawyer?" Peyton questions.

My head shoots up from the table. "Of course I'm excited to see him. I just wish it wasn't under these circumstances. I'm wearing my glasses for crying out loud! These glasses haven't seen the light of day in years," I exaggerate.

Margot rolls her eyes. "Calm your tits bitch, you look fine."

"Says the one who said that I sort of look like shit!" I exclaim.

"You said that to her?" Peyton grimaces.

"I was just joking," she lies.

"Just joking my ass," I grumble.

"Look Sage," Peyton starts, grabbing my attention. "You have nothing to worry about, okay? Sawyer looks at you with literal hearts in his eyes. I'm positive he doesn't care what you wear or the fact that you wear glasses because he's not that type of person. He loves you for you."

"He doesn't love me," I deny.

"Yes he does," they both affirm.

"You know what? I'm not even gonna argue with you guys 'cause my uterus feels like it's being stepped on by a stampede of blobfish at the moment," I voice.

"Blobfish? Really?" Margot expresses.

"What? It was the first animal that came to mind."

"Can blobfish even walk on land?" Peyton asks.

"Who are you asking?" Margot questions.

"Sage," Peyton says, like it's obvious.

"Wait, why are you asking me? Do I look like a blobfish expert to you?"

"Well you brought up the topic of blobfish," Peyton retorts and Margot nods along with her like she made a good point.

"Why are you guys talking about blobfish?" a voice that sounds a lot like Orion's says from behind me. My shoulders tense and I tightly shut my eyes hoping that Sawyer isn't standing there with Orion behind me.

I risk a glance and see the four boys standing there: Logan, Orion, Reece and drum roll please... Sawyer. Our eyes meet for a moment but I'm looking away just as fast.

Whenever I think of Sawyer, the last few interactions that we've had come to mind. He makes me feel different, in a good way and it's sort of scaring the shit out of me.

I feel like I'm in elementary school all over again with all of the familiar feelings bubbling up inside of me. It's only a matter of time before it's all too much and I explode. I don't want to explode.

I can't do a repeat of what happened after my fifth grade culmination, so in order to protect my heart, I'm going to attempt to keep my distance. I don't want to get hurt again. My heart won't be able to handle it the second time.