The Perfect Truth: A Finnick Odair Novel

Chapter 14

A/N: second last chapter??? AAAH

Warnings: swearing, pain, i forgot how badly this chapter was written but can't be assed to change it, angst, i cant even remember, medical stuff?

Word count: 1343

When I wake, I can feel I'm lying on a padded table. There's tubes in my left arm. My right arm feels like a flipper as it flops over my body, and I swing it around and rip the tubes from my arm because if I slide into death, it will be a victory against the Capitol. An urgent beeping goes off, but I don't manage to stay awake to find out who it will summon.

~

When I next swim back to consciousness, my hands are tied down on the table, the tubes back in my arm. I start struggling, eyes glaring at the ceiling before squeezing shut, teeth gritted as an ache shoots through my joints. I feel a soft touch on my arm and I peel open my eyes and am confronted by a pair of sea green ones.

'Finn!' I gasp, jerking forward, then slamming right back into the table because of the restraints around my wrists. I want to hold him, to feel him engulfing me in his warm embrace, to feel our bodies pressed against each other, but I can't, and instead I find myself crying at the unfairness of it all.

'Hey, hey,' Finn soothes, gently touching my face with his fingertips, wiping the tears away. 'I'll get you out. Just relax, babe. You're safe. You're safe now, Aderyn.'

I do, placated by the fact he isn't panicking, placated by the fact that at least he believes we're safe since he used my full name. He frees my wrists, and I reach forward so I can kiss him or touch him or something, but my arm is restricted by the length of the tubes. Frustrated, I go to rip them out again, but Finn stops me and gets onto the bed. He pulls me close, and my tears start to soak into the front of his nightgown, which is identical to mine. A sudden sob chokes me, and I wrap my right arm, the one without the tubes, around his neck and hold him to me, desperately clinging onto him.

Eventually, he prizes me off him and I immediately start whining like a spoiled five year old when you take away their favourite toy. He chuckles and pushes me down on the table, leaning over and kissing me sweetly on the lips.

'Sleep now, babe. Tomorrow your wish comes true, you get the tubes out.'

'Stay,' I croak, it's all I can manage. He smiles and lies back down beside me. I rest my head on his chest, comforted by his arms around me, and I close my eyes, assured by his nearness. I'm perfectly safe. The Capitol wouldn't have let me near him.

~

When I open my eyes, the sheets beside me are crumpled, but besides that, there's no sign of Finn. The tubes are indeed out of my arm, just as Finn said. I stumble around, walking down maze - like, pristine white corridors, until I hear Finn's voice. Following it, I find myself in a room with Finn, Haymitch and Plutarch, the head Gamemaker. I stagger over and collapse in a chair beside a haggard Finn.

'Why's he here?' I demand, pointing accusingly at Plutarch. 'Someone tell me what the fuck is going on!'

'Ah, sleeping beauty awakes,' Haymitch chuckles, and I shoot him a dirty look.

'I'm part of a rebel organisation. We had a plan to break you out of the Arena as soon as the Quell was announced. The Tributes from Three, Four, Six, Seven, Eight, and Eleven had varying amounts of knowledge about it. The bread was a code for the time of the rescue. The District where the bread originated indicated the day, and the number of rolls was the hour. We're going to District Thirteen. Johanna knocked you down to cut the tracker from your arm - we couldn't tell you or Peeta because you'd be the first to be recaptured when the force field blew. District Twelve was destroyed, but your family is safe in District Thirteen.'

I blink, drinking in the information. A plan I wasn't told about? Johanna, an ally? A tracker in my arm, what the actual fuck? My home, gone... Plutarch, a rebel? Bread... Mum, Prim, oh fuck, what about -

Peeta. Kat.

'Where's Peeta?' I ask sharply.

'He was picked up by the Capitol along with Johanna and Enobaria,' Finn says softly, and that's enough to kill me. My younger sister, oh God. She'll not know what will have happened to him. She needs him, for fuck's sake. Swearing, I stand up so fast that my chair falls over, and finding I don't want to risk hitting anyone here, I storm out of the room to find something else to attack.

I haven't gone far, lost in the hovercraft, when Finnick catches up with me. I spin around when he says my name, and I'm strangely infuriated by the way he spreads out his arms to hold me, somehow so calm, always so infuriatingly perfect, so understanding.

'Leave me alone,' I snarl.

'Why?'

'Peeta's gone!'

'Ryn, I - '

'Go away,' I spit. 'You'd never understand.'

'Babe - ' He pleads.

'Don't call me that, now of all times,' I snarl.

'Fine then. Ryn - '

'Don't you see?' I snarl. 'Peeta is gone!'

And immediately, I know I've gone too far. 'Is that it? You want him instead of me?'

'Finn - ' I say, but he cuts me off, backing away a few steps, shaking his head.

'Don't call me that. Don't - don't - I'm leaving you alone now, see? Are you happy?'

And then he's gone. I collapse on the floor and shove a fist into my mouth to muffle my sobs. What have I done? What have I done?

~

I wake up and my first thought is of him. Oh, God. A tear slips down my face, and I climb weakly out of the bed and pad through the corridors until I find his room. Holding in my sobs so I don't wake him, I sit down in a chair beside his bed and just watch him sleep. He looks younger, almost like a calmer version of the terrified fourteen year old kid that entered the Arena ten years ago, his face softened by sleep. Stirring, he mumbles something, and I see him tensing. He's having a nightmare, I realise, as he frowns in his sleep, and then he does something that makes me jump about a foot high. He calls my name, his voice so scared I immediately take his shoulders and shake him awake.

Finn's sea green eyes snap open, and they immediately become wet as he sees me hovering over him, eyes filled with worry.

'Finn?' I ask.

'Ryn,' he sobs. 'I'm sorry'

And then he's grabbing the front of my shirt so he can pull me close. I scramble onto the bed and let him press his face into my neck, as I rub his back and shoulders, holding him tightly against me.

'Finn, hon,' I whisper, my heart breaking for him. 'Hon, I...' I choke up, burying my face in his soft bronze hair; tighten my arms around him. He whimpers my name again, and I suck in a breath. 'I - I shouldn't have...' I bite my lip, trying to form words. 'God, Finn,' I say, feeling a salty tear slip down my cheek. 'I don't know what I did to have y - you, but I'll - I'll never deserve you.' My voice cracks, and another sob leaves his lips. I press him close to me, kissing his hair, and an overwhelming wave of love for him flows through me. I squeeze him tighter. 'You're mine,' I whisper in his ear, tears still streaming down my face. 'And fuck anyone who thinks differently, fuck whatever I say when I'm angry, you are mine.' I take a deep breath, fingers tightening in the bronze strands of his hair. 'And, hon, I'm all yours.'

And it's the fucking truth.