Trophy

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Addiction to achievement is the diagnosis
If only the medicine didn't feel like a hypnosis.

I see it in you now
And me too.
You looked at me and saw a trophy
A possessional prize,
Little did it help that you always feed into that stride
Living high to high and gold to gold on a never ending ride.
In me was what was great to hold but not commit to,
That's all you saw in your screwed vision
Back to back lenses of a perfect girl
Willing to chase the thrill
Willing to fight and kill
In the name of wanting you
Is that how you feel?
Did I chase you while you enjoyed the drill ?
Did I lose a piece of me and the hope my friends had in me ?
Just for following such an empty dream
Was it me ?
It could have been
I remember only wanting to keep you in a loop and string
That you realize it's immutable
This code was permanent
The feelings were mutual
Until they weren't.
So close to delusional you towered over me
And I violently sewed us together close to the hip with a double stitch
So you would never look over me
There is no need to revisit the cards
It's usually me the first to call
But I woke up one day
And saw the flaws
Not directed to you but to this little world
This closed system of idiocy
Woke me up
I can't chase you anymore to feed my ego and you the same
You can't stick to me because no one knew you the same
Brick for brick in this house we torn down
It was not just us to blame
But brick for brick that drove us insane
Over the white fence to my little cottage and new flame
I think to that and try not to reframe
That kind of stupidity for them not again
For if I am sober now why sleep with remains
For if I am awake why fight in vain

-Beyondcommonthinking

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