Forever with You (Under Editing And Revision)

Chapter 16: Feelings on Fast Forward

That was what Chris believed. Wala siyang tiwala sa mga babae. Naniniwala siyang sasaktan lang ng mga babae ang puso ng mga lalaki. Well, hindi 'yon malabo dahil nangyayari na 'yon. Girls break boys' heart, but not all girls do that. And boys also do the same. Patas lang ang mundo.

Siguro'y may nangyari lang na hindi maganda sa mga kaibigan ko sa nakaraan kaya't gano'n ang tingin nila sa mga babae. Hindi ko naman sila maaaring husgahan. I didn't wear the same shoes they wore. Kahit gaano pa ako katalino, hindi ko sila mauunawaan dahil hindi ko naman pinagdaanan ang pinagdaanan nila.

Mataas ang tingin ko sa mga babae. Siguro'y totoo ang sinabi nila na tinitingnan ko ang mga babae (paminsan-minsan) nang may pagnanasa. But that didn't mean that I didn't respect them. Lalaki lang din ako. And one of the reasons why to me, girls were more precious than any precious thing in the world was the fact that I had a great mom and best friend (who were also girls).

Mahal ko sila at hindi ko alam kung ano ang mangyayari kung wala sila sa buhay ko. To me, girls were the weirdest creatures on the planet, but the world needs them.

"Eh, kailan mo naman balak gawin 'yon, James?"

"Gio, I will never do that with her unless she's the girl God has given me."

"Corny," he commented.

Hindi na ako nagtataka kung bakit nila naisip 'yon. Kung nakikita ko lang siguro ang itsura namin ni Trixie habang magkasama kami, baka gano'n din ang inisip ko. Every time she saw me, she always hugged me. Sometimes she also kissed me on the cheeks. 'Tapos madalas, nakapulupot pa ang kanyang kamay sa braso ko at 'yong paraan niya ng paghawak sa akin ay talagang ibang-iba kumpara sa kung paano dapat hawakan ng isang tao ang kaibigan lang niya.

Tulad ngayon...

Nagulat ako nang bigla kong maramdaman ang kamay ni Trixie na nakapatong sa aking hita. This was the first time she put her hand on my thigh. Hindi talaga ako komportable.

I tried to act like there was nothing wrong and slowly removed her hand from my thigh. But after that, she put it on it again. I looked at her. She smirked. I smiled and tried to remove it again, but she stopped me. Wala akong nagawa kundi hayaan lang ang kanyang kamay na nakapatong doon.

"James, hindi ka ba nagsasawa sa pagkain ng gulay o prutas? Araw-araw, palaging masustansiya ang kinakain mo."

"And I don't think it's a bad thing."

"Anything that's too much is bad, James. Ang good example ay ang pagiging sobrang buti. Ang pagiging mabuting tao ay good, but if it's too much? It's bad. Gano'n din ang pagkain ng nutritious foods. Kapag sobra, masama," paliwanag niya. "At tingnan mo nga 'yang ulam mong tinola, oh. Halos wala nang karne ng manok. Parang puro sayote na lang ang nakikita ko."

"Pero gusto ko ito."

She raised an eyebrow. "Do you like it o wala ka lang choice but to eat and like it? Ang unang reason kaya kita nagustuhan ay ang pagiging good boy mo, James. Pero huwag ka namang maging sobrang buti. You don't need to always follow the rules. Learn how to break them, kahit minsan lang. Kapag nagawa mo 'yon, mas magugustuhan pa kita."

Iniisip ba niyang may pakialam ako sa nararamdaman niya para sa akin? Pero may pakialam ba ako o wala? I didn't know. Maybe I did? Because I liked her too? I didn't know.

Hanggang ngayon, hindi pa rin ako nakatitiyak kung alin ang tamang paraan para malaman kung gusto o mahal mo na ang isang tao. But if what Gio said was true, that when you felt something really different whenever you saw someone, you were already in love, then I didn't just like her. Because that only meant that I already fell for her.