Get A Room!

~:*:~ Ninety-Eight ~:*:~

That's where Leona came into the scheme. She knew that I wanted to surprise Jedson at the bar with my confession, so it was her job to verify my excuse for bailing on the night, to monitor Jedson's drinking to ensure his sobriety during my confession, and to generally control the other guys at the table so they don't accidentally mess up my surprise with an ill-timed belch or call to the waitress. I was originally planning on telling them so we could avoid these types of accidents, but Leona was quite certain that they'd spill the beans simply by staring at the front door too often or demanding updates from her as to my ETA. She knew the boys better than I did, so I trusted her judgement.

So while they were enjoying their first round, I raced to the flower market to pick up my order of tulips. When the second round began, I was back in my room changing into the suit I wore at my high school graduation. I remember buying it because I thought it made me look more handsome instead of pretty. But looking at myself in the mirror now, I realized that it didn't really change anything about me. I just looked like me... and if that meant people saw me as pretty, then so be it! I'd be the prettiest boy they would ever see in their lifetime, making them all jealous and envious of anyone who gets to stand near me.

Progress. I like this self-confidence.

I left my room shortly after that and took a cab to the bar. I texted Leona just before going in to make sure Jedson was still sitting at the table, and not in the bathroom or stumbling out the side door into the alleyway to vomit. When she messaged me an emoji thumbs up, along with about a dozen hearts and a squeal of good luck, I pushed open the front door and boldly marched over to their table in the back corner.

Again, I didn't want an insane audience of strangers witnessing my confession because I wasn't ready for that. So Leona specifically chose a bar that would be fairly empty for a Friday night. She did her homework and found out that two bars down the street were having promotions and parties, so it was more likely that most of the students from campus would be at one of those locations tonight instead of here. I also asked her to pick a booth at the back so I could avoid eye contact with any lingering strangers while I confessed, for they would all be sitting at the bar and at tables behind me.

I could do this. I could do this. I could do this.

Just tell him how you feel, and everything will be alright.

Leona smiled in my direction and spoke loudly to be heard over boys, who were still chatting and oblivious to my approach. "Hey... isn't that Bright?!"

"What?" Jedson caught my name as it left her lips, suddenly becoming hyper aware as he abandoned the conversation and searched the room for me. When his eyes found me, they went wide in wonder and nervous energy. "Holy shit... he looks fucking amazing!" He let slip out, unashamedly.

The rest of the guys fell silent as I stopped in front of their table. All eyes were on me now.

I held the bouquet tightly in one hand as I reached for Jedson with the other. I guided him to stand in front of me, and then took a deep breath to calm my nerves.

"Jedson... I know I've made a lot of mistakes in our friendship, and even more on the road to becoming more than friends. I was scared of everything you had to offer because I was so stuck in my old ways, unable to change until it was too late. I lost your affection, and I lost you as a friend. Even after all the things those bullies and gossipers put me through, I still felt like losing you was the most painful part of the whole ordeal. I don't want to feel like that again, and I don't want to play around with your feelings anymore. I'm quite certain of my affection for you, and I'm willing to change my less than desirable behaviours to become brave enough to stand by your side. Now I know I should probably be playing your favourite song on the piano and singing along to show how much you mean to me, or I should recite a famous quote about the heart's desires from your favourite book... but we both know that my piano playing is that of a child, my singing voice is far from desirable, and I'm honestly afraid that I'll pass out if I have to keep this speech up for much longer with famous words that don't belong to me." I go off script to make a joke, hoping to lighten the mood, "Plus your favourite books are murder mysteries that tend to lack romance anyways, so that one could also be your fault!" I wave off the silly comment and continue hastily, "So I know that my confession lacks all the bells and whistles you certainly deserve, but you seem to like me just the way I am... including my simplicity. So here I am, taking a chance to be brave and honest with you! I care about you so much, and I want to explore what we have because-... well..." I took a deep breath and gulped down the last of my doubts before stating proudly, "... because I'm in love with you, Jedson."