adopted by 𝒑𝒂𝒖𝒍 𝒅𝒂𝒏𝒐

the whorephanage

POV: READER

Shutting my journal and stuffing it under my bedsheet so that no one could ever read it, I stood up and gazed into a mirror beside my bed. My beautiful swirling orbs of eyes stared back at me. God I'm so pretty.

Staring at my self for at least ten minutes before I went to take my allocated ONE shower a month, I scrubbed myself down so that my skin was perfectly raw. Yeah that's good. After, I went and pulled out a dress from the closet. "Hey Y/N." Someone inside the closet greeted me. "Oh, hey John Lennon." After, I closed the door to the closet.

"CHILDREN AND Y/N COME DOWN." 

The Nun downstairs called us all, it was time. Adoption time. I sighed, knowing I'd never get adopted even though I was so pretty and talented and sexy. I was too old, sadly. No one ever adopts a 19 year old for good reasons.

Coming down the stairs in the herd of ugly people, I obviously stood out. I was just the prettiest. Sometimes I thought perhaps I was the Goddess Aphrodite reincarnated on earth because I was just so much  beauty in one person and then I'd get told to shut up. They hated Jesus because he spoke the truth, and they hate me too.

It was okay though because I had my orphanage phone that let me go on youtube and watch stuff. Everyone had one, even the annoying IPad kid next to me."Hey Y/N, look! I'm playing AMOGUS."The kid, who's name was Tommy said to me. "Who gives a shit."I replied and he frowned before crying. I ignored him.

Sticking my middle finger up to the Nun, I turned around about to go back upstairs because this was taking WAY too long, I was stopped.

The door swung open and a man.. A MAN stepped in. With a WOMAN. He looked familiar, almost like I'd seen him getting beat up in several movies before but I couldn't place him. But the WOMAN, GOD it was ZOE KAZAN. I knew her, she was so famous and pretty just like me except I'm not famous yet. 

"Oh Golly! Sorry, I think I broke the door handle."The man said, looking apologetically at the stunned Nun who was too stunned to speak. She simply nodded and looked up at the ceiling before praying to God I think.

Zoe glanced at her quizzically before look around. "Hey children, we're here to adopt."She said with a smile so wonderful it lit the room up. So cool.

I still didn't know who this man was, It was ALMOST like I knew what he was from but I couldn't place it. Maybe he was a singer in a indie band or played the riddler but I don't know. Oh well.

As I went to place my foot on the stair step, I noticed too late that someone had left their autographed amongus character plushie on the first step (TOMMY...) and I stepped on it, slipping immediately and falling backwards. I let out a scream, curdling blood kind of scream that sends shivers down your spine and would get you in on a job interview as a scream queen for the next hottest slasher movie. It was loud.

It was like the world went into stopmotion, slow and very slow. I was falling back but then as my eyes looked up whilst falling, I saw him.

THE MAN. Next to the WOMAN. She looked shocked that I was falling, horrified even. The man however looked sure of himself.

"Oh no!"He said.

I fell. It hurt my back but, whatever. The wind was knocked out of my lungs and I couldn't breathe. It was like I had asthma or something like that. I didn't but yeah.

"Are you okay? That looked like a harsh fall!"I heard the man speak but my brain didn't register because it hurt like fuck, and honestly I didn't care about him."Whatever."I said, sitting up and rubbing the back of my head awkwardly. 

It's okay, I was still pretty and stuff. "Don't mind me, I'm good. Go adopt or something."I muttered and quickly got up, but the woman stepped forward quickly. "Paul, I think we should adopt her.."I heard her whisper, the man Nodded.

"We're going to adopt this one, please."The man said to the Nun that hadn't spoken in like ten minutes, she snapped out of her stupor and frowned. "That one? She's a little... Hm...I don't mean to judge, since I'm not God but... Hm.."The Nun couldn't figure out what to say.

What can I say? I'm cool as hell. She was speechless. "Yes, that one."Zoe clarififed. The Nun sighed. "Alright, that will be 58.93$ please, cash or credit?"The man pulled out his credit card, it was a black card. Those are for super rich people. WOAH.

"Credit."He said, still very sure of himself. Zoe put an hand on my shoulder with a worried look. "Do you have a concussion? Are you sure you're okay?"She asked very worriedly, judging by the look on her face. I nodded because I didn't wanna seem like a pussy but the world around me was starting to spin. Oh well..

After I went upstairs to pack my singular bag because the orphanage was poor and stuff, they led me to a car. It was a clown car. Why the fuck did they have a clown car??

"Just get in the back, I'll take care of the bag."The man said, taking my bag and putting it in the car. I nodded a bit confused and got in the back. Well, there was surely a lot of room in here at least.

"Alright, home time! I'm so excited, haha!!"The man said. His name was Paul right? I don't know. 

With a honk of the horn, the car began to go. It was ridiculously fast. Like a sports car, I don't understand how but yeah. I felt like I was gonna throw  up but I didn't cause throwing up hurts my tummy.

When we got to their house it was HUGE, and very big. Like a mansion or something. I got out of the car and went to grab my bag but someone grabbed it before me. It was the man- No wait.

"John Lennon? What- How did you get out of the closet? How did you get HERE?"I asked, bewildered. 

"Oh, This car has a connection to the orphanage closet. I came along for the ride, but I'll head back now. I've got a song to write about stuff. I think."I nodded as he spoke, because he did have to write a song. That's all he was good for at the orphanage anyway.

Oh well. I took my bag from him and left the car, walking over to the couple who were waiting patiently. "Oh, you know John Lennon? That's my brother."The man said with a smile. Oh. Weird.

"Anyways, I'm Zoe and this is Paul."Zoe introduced, even though I knew her name was Zoe because she was famous and I know this man had to also be famous but I still didn't know why. Paul...Paul Blart? No. That didn't make sense. It was on the tip of my tongue..

"Geez! Look at the time, alright let's head inside!"The man ushered us into the megaplex house they owned with that smile. It was weird. Why'd he smile like that? Is he okay? Does he have to shit??? I don't know.

"This is the house, I hope you like it. You're going to be living here so feel free to ask for a tour. Goodbye."The couple walked off immediately, leaving me to my devices. Woah. Okay.

I pulled out my orphanage phone to check the time and realized it wasn't working. Probably because I wasn't in the orphanage anymore. That's kind of stupid, but okay.

Tossing it into the trash in the kitchen, I looked around. This was my new home. I couldn't believe I was adopted. Woah. That's crazy. I'm a whole adult, why was I adopted??

Oh well.

I walked over to the stairs, carefully inspecting them incase I were to slip on another stupid piece of shit toy like before but the stairs were completely clear so I went up them and the upstairs was also big. I went to the door that said 'ADOPTED CHILD ROOM.' I guess this was mine.

Stepping inside, it was filled to the brim with stuff. But it was okay I guess. "Is this... A broom closet..??"I asked no one in particular while inspecting the area. There was a mop and a bucket, cleaning supplies and other junk. And then a bed. Cool!

"Nice.."I jumped onto the bed and closed my eyes. Today was exhausting. Hopefully tomorrow things wouldn't be so tiring. I yawned and tried to ignore the smell of wet dirty mop before I drifted off to sleep....