dreams to reality

17.

"We can't do Bella because Janine isn't here, unless Lucy fills in for me and I do Janine's role" I whisper to Keira. We agreed and Lucy went for me and I went for Janine. The ref blew the whistle and we done the exact movemt of yesterday. I saw the ball come rolling across and Jordan was in front of me, I faked the shot and pulled it onto my right, she fell for it and I took the opportunity to shoot. It went into the back of the net and we went crazy. I didn't celebrate too much, I held my hands up acknowledging the fact that I am on loan from there. Janine was on her way around but stopped to watch the free kick, I noticed her and ran over. "That was for you Beckie" I say hugging her, "the Bella special" she reply's making me laugh.

We eventually got back into our half and 5 minutes was announced as injury time. We basically went into a 5-5 trying to see the game out. Luckily we did and everyone was exhausted and fell to their knees. I shook everyone's hands and had a little catch up with my former teammates, Jonas was last. "You proved me wrong, I apologise" he said making me smile. "Why? Why did you put me out to city when they were 7 points behind?" I ask him. "I thought we would see it out and I never knew it was possible for them to come back" he said, that's makes more sense. I said goodbye and went to celebrate with my teammates in the changing room.

We blared music and we're having a good time, "that was unreal from you today smith" Chris the assistant manager said, "thanks Chris" I reply. "Somebody's outside for you" he says, I excuse myself and hand Georgia my phone for music.

I walk out and see Leah. "What do you want?" I say a little harsh, she stands in silence. "Why is this so hard? I feel like I've lost you, one week ago you make me the happiest girl in the world and now I don't think I even know you" I say as Leah stays quiet. "Firstly you ignore me all week, then today you put in a challenge like that on my teammate-" she cuts me off, "it's football it happens, and teammate? Yeah right" she says once again confusing me.

"You have never ever put in a challenge like that before, what are you even talking about? I don't understand, you said something like this on the pitch as well" I say, "you really don't think I can't see you two, the story, the instagram posts. How you reacted when she was down and when you scored" I started to realise what she was talking about.

I laugh, "are you seriously jealous? Janine is a friend, she has a fucking boyfriend Leah. Get that in your head. I reacted like that because it's her last game before she goes to Portland thorns, she's my teammate for gods sake we spend nearly everyday together, of course I'm gonna react like that. Is this really what it's going to be like? You getting jealous over one little thing?" I say with my voice raised.

She goes quiet, "Leah that's so pathetic, maybe if you gave me a chance to talk to you during the week you wouldn't of reacted like this" I add before walking away, she pulls my arm "Bella wait-" she says, I cut her off "no Leah. I need a break" I said.

"your just giving up on us like that?" Leah says, i scoff "maybe if you would just talk to me about these things I wouldn't be needing this break, this isn't going to work if you just ignore me and don't talk about anything" I reply.

"Bella I'm sorry, I really am. I thought of the worst thing instead of trusting you" she says, "I need to leave, I can't do this right now" I say practically running back into the changing room. The team didn't really notice me come back in apart from Georgia, I go into the bathroom and place my hands on the sink. She comes up behind me and gives me a hug, "you okay?" She asks, "I can't do this anymore" I say starting to cry, she turns me around and hugs me. I start to explain what happened and start to feel physically sick so I run to the toilet and start vomiting. She holds my hair back and motions for a medic, they bring water over and I start to drink it. It takes me a few minutes to calm down as I'm sitting on the floor alongside Georgia.

"Are you seriously okay?" She asks me very concerned. "I don't know anymore, I feel numb" I say truthfully. "You need to rest, you are always on the go" she says rubbing my hand. I was starting to feel a lot better and managed to get a shower then changed.

We were on the bus back to the hotel and we were all having a team dinner. Everyone was getting up and doing something, Keira looked at me and motioned for me to do something. I refused, that was until everyone was asking. I eventually gave in and asked to borrow a guitar, I took the mic and sat down. I started to sing one of my songs and played with the guitar, I can see quite a lot of shocked faces which I expected. When I finished everyone started to cheer and it made me feel genuinely happy, "what can't you do, holy shit" Janine says making everyone laugh. "I was thinking the exact same" Lucy adds.

Half an hour goes past and it was starting to get late, "One final song for our beautiful Janine Beckie" ellie says standing on her chair, "Bella can you play one, I have nothing" she says making everyone burst out laughing. I get up and bruno mars, Grenade was requested. I started to sing and everyone joined in. This team has such an amazing bond, a few tears rolled down many faces. "Thank you for everything janine" everyone said.

It started to quiet down and most people started to leave and go up to their room, however 7 of us were left, me, Janine, Ellie, Georgia, Lucy, keira and Alex. "Do you guys want to come to mines for a little party?" I ask them getting an immediate yes. We told a few staff members and gave the gc a message telling them to join us if they wanted, we ordered a few taxis and got to my house. "Your house is beautiful" a few of them said. I pulled out alcohol and that was the start to a really fun night.

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