The Fourth Eaton

Chapter 22 🔪 Stupidity

Jab. Front kick. Cross punch. Knee. Hook. Roundhouse kick. Uppercut. Side kick.

My friends have asked me how I'm so unaffected by the simulations. I want to tell them I'm not unaffected; my nightmares are more vivid than before, and I scan every room I walk into for potential exits. I'm just better at hiding it.

Because my fears are scary, but none of them top Marcus. And I had to live with him for sixteen years.

I learned to hide any and all fear in that house. It is that skill that is helping me throw off suspicion about my Divergence. In a way, Marcus is saving my life, and I hate it. Because I would risk exposing the divergence of both my brother and I in a heartbeat if it meant Tobias and I didn't have to go through the hell that we did.

Jab. Front kick. Cross punch. Knee. Hook. Roundhouse kick. Uppercut. Side kick.

Today's fear was especially haunting; I imagined that Tobias, Lavender, Ethan, Julia, Juniper, Kian, Chloe, and Rowan were standing in a line in front of me, and I had a gun in my hand. I cringed at the sight of my brother. There goes the plans of hiding our relation. But that thought had quickly faded from my mind, with what came next. To my horror, my arm had started lifting up of its own accord. Somehow, my mouth still worked, and I screamed, trying to get my arm to stop going up, but it was no use. I couldn't control my fingers, and my right pointer finger squeezed the trigger, bullets hitting all my friends and family one by one, as they stared at me with betrayed eyes.

Jab. Front kick. Cross punch. Knee. Hook. Roundhouse kick. Uppercut. Side kick.

After the sim was over, I had looked at Tobias, and started blabbering, my hysteria getting the best of me.

"I tried- oh, god, I tried to make it stop, but my arm wouldn't stop, and you all died-"

"Cammi, calm down." He replied, putting his hands on my shoulders. He didn't say anything else, but his squeezing hands and solemn eyes, full of no anger or pity, only sadness, which I suspect was for me rather than him, spoke volumes. You wouldn't do that. I could hear the words as clearly as I would if he were saying them out loud. They trust you. I trust you.

I don't doubt that - my friends and my brother have shown their trust for me in so many ways.

It's myself I don't trust.

I would never hurt them purposely - I know that. But I could hurt them accidentally. And I would never forgive myself.

After that, I came straight to the training room. That was hours ago, but the haunting images of everyone I love on the ground, bleeding out, dying by my hand, still haven't left my brain.

Jab. Front kick. Cross punch. Knee. Hook. Roundhouse-

"Hey."

The sudden, unexpected voice, coming from the training room doors, makes me freeze in the middle of my roundhouse kick. Of course, my momentum doesn't stop, and I crash to the floor.

I push myself into a sitting position and turn to face the person who found me. To my relief, it's Tobias. He is, however, chuckling at my reaction to his voice. "You are way too easy to surprise."

"Hey." I get to my feet and face him, hands on my hips defensively. "I was focused on the bag, alright? Let me come interrupt you in your workout someday, then you can talk."

He rolls his eyes. "I actually came to tell you that the stage 2 rankings are going up in the dormitory soon. You probably want to be there."

"But I thought no cuts were made after stage 2?"