First Wife, First Love.

37. Opening Up.

'As I am biased, then maybe until Mayra makes any decision, I should live at Nanu's house. Till then, don't contact me.'

"What?" I ask and stand up. "This is so not fair, Arya."

Now what do I do? I thought that maybe if I could take her out, she would forgive me, but this is getting worse. Should I follow her? Or should I wait till she calms down? No, I can't wait till then. What if she thinks I don't care about her? And that is why I didn't approach her early on?

Last time also she was upset that I didn't even text her. This time I won't do something like that again. I think for a few minutes, then an idea pops into my head. If she can go, then I can follow her too and it is not like Mami Ji won't be happy about it. And in this way, I can know Malhotra and Shaurya better.

With fresh energy, I get back to work. I go home early and pack a duffel bag. I already contacted Mami Ji and told her I was coming over to stay for a night and would have dinner with them. And also, as it is a surprise for Arya, she should not tell her about my plan.

"Where are you going, Ved?" Mom asks when I come down.

"I am going to stay at Arya's place tonight. It has been a while since I last visited them and Arya complained too one or two times that I should stay with them for at least one night." I say. It is the first time I am lying to Mom.

"Really? Then why do I get this feeling you are hiding something from me? I heard what happened in the morning. Not much, but enough to know that Arya is upset with you, isn't she?" Mom asks, and I know that I have to tell the truth. So I tell her everything.

"Ouch! Mom." I say as she tugs my ear then slaps the side of my head lightly, "Why would you do that?"

"Because, my son, you are so insensitive and stupid sometimes. Arya's family is your family now. How would you feel if Arya had been talking ill about our family? Would you not feel that maybe she didn't accept us as we are and judge us without knowing us fully? Huh?" Mom asks.

"I didn't think that way at that time. And I know what I said was wrong. That's why I am going there to make up with her and also apologise." I say as I rub my ear.

"Good. Do that and bring my daughter back. Also, Mayra is capable and adult enough to make her own decision. You do need to dictate her decision. She made excellent decisions in life so far, with no interruptions from others. She can do that later on, too. The only thing you need to do is support her. Nothing else. Understood?" Mom asks and I nod.

"Yes. But Mom, you also tried to influence her decision." I say.

"I did no such thing." Mom says with wide eyes, "I stated a fact. Loving a child which is not yours is difficult. It can either make you feel very good about yourself or make you feel ‌you are nothing but a selfish person trying to be good."

"Did you feel like that for Mayra?" I ask.

"I don't know. The only thing I know I didn't want her to feel that I pity her. And maybe I was scared because I would not be doing her any justice as a mother. I lost my baby, which I thought would be a daughter as you wanted a sister so much. Then my focus was just on you. I know I was unfair to her, but showing her the emotions which I was confused about would have been even cruel." Mom says as she sits down on the couch. And this is the first I heard talking freely about Mayra.

"Do you hate her?" I ask, taking her hand in mine as I sit down on the floor.

"No. How could I hate a child? I never hated her. If anything, I liked her. She has this immense patience and resilience. Sometimes I feel like I envy her for that." She says and I somewhat understand her.

"Mom, can I ask you something?" I ask and she nods, "Have you ever thought of accepting Mayra as your daughter?"

She looks at me for a few seconds, then takes a deep breath and says, "Yes."

"Really? Then why didn't you?" I ask with wide eyes.

"I... I... I tried to, but instead I ended up hurting her. It was the time when Adhrit was still alive and was finding ways to get back to us. I remember you were gone on a school trip, which I forced you to go on so you can enjoy your childhood rather than focus on me. Mayra and I were alone in the house. Your Dadu and Dadi had gone to the temple. I was looking after Mayra, as her nanny was late, when he came. He dragged me into the study while Mayra was taking a nap and tried to force me to sign the papers. But I didn't. He couldn't beat me, otherwise he would get in big trouble." Mom says, and I am shocked because I know nothing about this incident.

"Then what happened?" I ask.

"I may have gotten way too angry with the way he was turning out to be. I mean, he was never like that. The Adhrit I knew he had a colossal ego, but he also was a good man. At that moment, I asked him if he was like this his whole life or did he turn out to be this bad because of something else? And he said I was the one because of whom his life got ruined. His life got ruined." Mom says and laughs bitterly.

"Mom, it is okay." I say.

"He said I was bad luck for him and so were you and so were Mayra and Ramya. And so will be Saira. I was angry with him for saying many cruel things after that, just for a piece of paper." Mom says as she looks at me with pain in her eyes, "I was so angry that I grabbed the nearest thing in my hand and threw it at him. But he ducked at the last moment and the paperweight hit Mayra right on the head. She must have just woken and maybe tried to find someone and heard us. I was horrified by what happened. The one time I showed what I felt and I hurt an innocent child whose mother I wanted to become."

Mom puts her head in her hands in despair. I look at her in a new light. All these years, I thought my mother had a good way of dealing with her emotions. But all she was doing was suppressing them because she thought her emotions could hurt someone, physically. I so want to kill that bastard all over again.

"What did he do after that?" I ask, and Mom looks up at me.

"At first, he was shocked. Then he threatened me. He will prove to the court that he should have Mayra's custody because of the incident, which will gain him part in the property. As obviously your Dadu had promised me, he would divide everything equally to his every grandchild. But I was busy tending to Mayra. I was hearing everything and then I said he did it. He obviously felt like I was bluffing, but I said nobody would believe that I did it, but everybody would believe that he did. He was shocked again. I must say somewhere in my heart I was literally proud of myself by shocking that man twice. He left when he heard his parents' arrival." Mom says.

"Did anyone know you hurt Mayra accidentally?" I ask.

"No. I can't tell anyone. Not even maids. Because if they proved me guilty, the court would have sent Mayra to live with that monster or that haunted place. She doesn't remember that incident. I said she accidentally hit the doorknob." She says, and a silence falls between us for a few seconds.

"Mom, don't let that one incident affect your life? Accept Mayra. You definitely love her. If not, why would you protect her again and again? Why would you wait for her when she used to come home late? Why would you make her favourite dish at her achievements? Why?" I ask and we hear a ghungaroo falling on the ground.

Mom and I both turn around to see Mayra standing there with tears in her eyes. Looks like today is made for eavesdropping. But this one is good. I hope today these two get what they want. Freedom from the past and love for the future.