Her Unwanted Love

I stared at the scene in front of me. I held my umbrella tight as my knees weakened. My head was throbbing while my heart is aching. Nang makita kong gumilid sila lahat upang makadaan ako ay napahigpit lalo ang kapit ko sa payong. Pakiramdam ko ay matutumba ako dahil sa panlalambot ng aking tuhod.

I just stared at her coffin, ignoring all the stares that held pity and curiosity at me. I take a step forward. Mabagal akong lumapit sa kinaroroonan ng kabaong niya. Halos pahakbang-hakbang iyon. Napakabigat.

Nang marating ko ang harap ng kaniyang kabaong ay napatitig ako ng mariin sa litrato niya. Nakangiti siya, pero hindi iyon umabot sa mata. My gaze lowered from the picture. Ramdam ko ang panginginig ng kamay kong may hawak na puting rosas nang tumitig ako sa mukha niyang payapa.

She still looked beautiful... and peaceful.

Umangat ang kamay kong may hawak na rosas. Dahan-Dahan ay nilagay ko iyon sa taas ng kaniyang kabaong. I blink away the tears that are forming on the side of my eyes. A small smile crept on my pale face.

"Rest now, mother." Iyon lang at tumalikod na ako. Bumalik ako sa tabi ni Mia na nagpupunas ng luha. She smiled sadly, and I smiled back.

Lumipas ang mga minuto, unti-unti ay nagsialisan na ang mga nakiramay. Habang ako ay nakatayo lang sa tabi ng puntod niya. Ilang saglit pa ay naramdaman ko ang marahang pagpatong ng kamay sa likod ko. Lumingon ako at nakita ko agad ang nakangiting mukha ni Tita Trina.

Her smile was so comforting, that I wanted to throw myself to her and cry in her arms. But I restrained myself.

"Call if you need anything, okay sweetie?" Sabi niya habang namumula ang mata. I nodded and smiled appreciatively.

"Thank you, Tita," I said, almost a whisper, afraid that my voice might crack. Nagulat ako nang maingat niya akong hinila at niyakap.

"Make her proud even more." She whispered in my ear as I returned her embrace. I nodded as my eyes closed for a second.

"I will." Ilang saglit pa ay kumalas na ako. Nagpaalam siyang aalis na at pinapanood ko siyang umalis. Sa gilid ng mata ko ay nakita kong nakatayo sa gilid ko si Mia.

"Hatid na kita." Umiling ako sa kaniya at ngumiti.

"H'wag na. Ayos lang ako." Iyon lang at hindi na siya nagpumilit pa. Not so long after, she left, leaving me all alone. I stayed there for hours until my legs felt numb. Madilim na nang mapagdisisyonan kong umalis na. Umalis ako nang mabigat ang pakiramdam.

_-_

As I entered my room, I gently shut my door close. Sumandal ako doon at pumikit. Kasabay ng pagandas ng mga luha ko ay ang mabagal na pag-upo ko sa malamig na sahig ng aking madilim na kwarto.

Dinala ko ang mga paa ko malapit sa aking dibdib at aking nilagay ang kamay ko sa ibabaw ng aking tuhod. My head hung low, as the tears are uncontrollably sliding in my cheeks. Pakiramdam ko ay pinipiga ang puso ko sa sakit. I bit my lip to surpass the sobs, but I have failed.

"Mother..." Escaped from my lips as a soft sob escaped too. In the four corners of my room, I let myself lose myself in the abyss of darkness and pain.

_-_-_-_

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author's imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

No part of this book may be reproduce or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recorging or by any formations storage and retrieval system, without written permission from the author.

Warning! There are misspelled words ahead and grammatical errors. This story isn't perfect but I'm not sorry for it. Bear with the imperfections if you want to read my story. Thanks for reading!

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I already warned you!