hi, i'm completely new to writing and this is my first fanfic so it's probably rubbish
A boy walked in. Harry looked up from his phone. He smiled. "The usual?"
"Yeah, thanks." he chuckled
Harry nodded and turned to the coffee machine, placing the cup under and pressing the button. He got the milk out the fridge and poured it into the murky brown liquid so that it turned a pretty beige colour. He pressed the lid on and picked up a pen. Shit. He'd forgotten how to spell Louis. He looked up, a hopeful smile on his face.
"L-O-U-I-S" Louis spelled it out. Harry paused before drawing a heart next to his name and passing it over.
"Thanks mate."
"£2.40 I think?" Harry responded
"£2.50!!" Shouted Marie from the kitchen. Harry sighed. "£2.50 then." Harry said in a fairly cheery voice.
Louis shoved three pounds into Harry's hand and closed it shut. He held his hand there for a second. Harry let out a little gasp. He looked straight into those beautiful blue eyes and had to look away before he started blushing. "Keep the change!" Louis shouted as he walked out the door, winking at Harry.
Harry was left standing behind the counter blushing like a tomato. He didn't like Louis. Did he? He wasn't gay, he'd only had girlfriends his whole life. But then again he'd never felt like this towards anyone before. He shook the thought out his mind and turned them to organising the bread on the shelves instead.
His shift ended and he trailed outside. He got in his car and sat there. He couldn't stop thinking about that boy. He'd denied it for weeks, ever since he first came in, but today was different. Those eyes. They were so blue that it was like looking right at the sky even though it was the middle of winter and the sky was always grey and rainy.
He sighed turning on the engine and reversed out of the car park. All the way home he couldn't stop thinking about that boy.
Louis.
~~~
!!TW!! : Self-harm, ED
"MUM I'M HOMEEEE!!!" Harry shouted, bursting through the front door. "Hey Haz!" Anne smiled at him, "How was work?" she asked. "Yeah, fine I guess." Harry responded. "What's wrong Harry? You've not been yourself for weeks!" Anne cupped his cheeks. "What's on your mind?" "Nothing Mum! Get off me!" Harry squealed. Anne ruffled his hair and smiled sadly. "Okay, dinners ready in half an hour, yeah?" "What are we having?" Harry asked, gulping down his thoughts. Anne chuckled. "Pizza." "Okay, thanks Mum."
Harry ran up the stairs. He shut himself in his room. His breath was shaky and his hands were clammy. Pizza. How could he eat pizza, he thought. He was already so fat. Tears welled up in his eyes. He paced back and forth across the room, trying to resist the urge. He knew he shouldn't. Niall said he shouldn't. But he couldn't help it. The blade sliced through his skin. A tear dropped into the cut he just made on his wrist.
It stung.
But Harry didn't care. Josh. He was right. Harry was fat. Harry did deserve to die. He did deserve all those cuts he had made. They weren't just on his wrists. They were on his stomach. His fat ugly stomach. He knew he would force himself to throw up all the pizza he ate later but the thought of even putting that greasy cheese near his mouth made him want to throw up.
Shit.
He was covered in blood. The boy rushed to the bathroom and wrapped his wrists tight in bandages before cleaning up his bloodied body. He went back to his room and put all his bracelets and ripped bandanas back over his wrists, covering the bandages. He changed his shirt and splashed his face with water. "HARRY, DINNER!" his mum called up the stairs as Harry was fixing his hair in the mirror. He ran downstairs, he didn't want his mother to suspect he wasn't really eating and piled three pieces of pizza onto his plate.
"Not hungry?" his mum commented. "Nah, I err had a big lunch." Harry stuttered. "Harry? Not hungry?" she laughed. "Well I've got to pop into the office for a bit Harry I expect that whole pizza will be gone by the time I get back." She grinned and ruffled his hair before kissing his forehead and shutting the door behind her. Harry sat there staring at the door. He heard the cars exhaust turn on and rev up as she turned left out of the drive. Harry got up and threw his pizza in the bin before rushing to the sink. He had a horrible feeling in his stomach, like he was going to throw up. He didn't care, he needed to get that grease and fat out of him before he became even fatter than he already was.
The sink became and murky brown and Harry turned on the tap, gasping for air. He couldn't breath. His hands started shaking. He gripped onto the sink and looked up at the bright blue tiles.
"Louis." he said still gasping.
Harry shook the thought out of his head but those eyes were always on his mind. He turned off the tap and stumbled to the bathroom. The boy opened the cupboard to get some paracetamol in the hope it would make his wrists sting a little less. He stared at the bottle for a while. No he thought I deserve this pain. He turned round to the full body mirror. And lifted up his shirt to pinch at his skin on his stomach. He was so thin but he didn't see it, all he saw was fat. Niall tried to convince him to see the skinny frail boy that he was but Harry wouldn't listen.
Fat. Fat. Fat. whispered the voice in his head
"FAT."
he screamed.
