very normal (not weird at all) modern TKAM fanfic (very normal)(not weird)

chapter 5: family reunion

⚠️🚨DISCLAIMER🚨⚠️ This chapter is NOT meant to imply homophobia in ANY way. It's not meant to offend anyone and it is not meant to be homophonic. Thank you

     One day the finches got invited to a family reunion picnic with auntie alexandra and uncle jack and aunt alexandra's husband (forget his name) and FRANCIS!!!! The day was going great because atticus forced scout into a skirt with really high socks. Atticus was wearing a super tight tanktop and short shorts to flex his STRONG CALF MUSCLES. Jem was wearing some black khakis because he was in his uwu goth phase. His shirt had a bat on it because he simped for batman and he was emo. Anyway things were going good. Auntie alexandra was being racist and francis was assaulting a squirrel. Uncle Jack was grilling some hotty doggies and francis attempted to grill the slaughtered squirrel but jack said no.
     When the finch family arrived francis was very sad and he tried to hide from atticus' demon children. He bit scout on the leg and got in BIG trouble (he got his xbox taken away). Atticus came over to the table with his aviator sunglasses and picknick basket full of cheese for dill (why was dill there?). Dill was wearing a FNAF tshirt because he love chica. While the adults were talking about politics (about joe byron) the kids were having a dual on the playground. Francis was trying to be king of the mountain but dill threw his FNAF figurine at francis' balls. Francis was easily defeated and dill became the ultimate ruler.
     "I hate you!!!!!!!" screamed francis. "Bonnie is hotter anyway... BUT IM NOT GAY!!! GAY PEOPLE ARE SINNERS!!!"
     "Ok well whose holding the freddy fazbear figurine lol"
     Francis screamed and ran back to his grammy. He shoved his face with 10 hot dogs (and maybe the squirrel.. or maybe not...). Aunt alexandra was trying to explain to atticus why francis was going to harvard (he had an iq of 50 tho) but when they looked over at him, he was trying to fit a 9 inch hotdog down. "Look at how smart my lil baby boy is!" Alexandra said. "Much smarter than ur ugly emo son."
     "Francis will fit right in at college" atticus said as francis shoved the hotdog down his throat.
     Right here and there, Jeremy emerged from the shadows of a lone tree. His hair was draped over one of his eyes and he stole miss maudie's eyeliner (atticus did not have eyeliner and scout was quirky). Jem even stole miss maudie's bronzer to draw fake abs on his beer belly. He was crying but unfortunately it was not for the act, he was still heartbroken over mayella. While jem acted depressed, scout took uncle jack's hotdog knife and cut her socks down to the ankle. She proceeded to take the long sock pices and wear it like a tube top because she saw the highschoolers do it like that once (but there were no highschoolers in maycomb).
     "Scout dear u look very nice," said atticus. Aunt alexandra proceeded to throw up and yell at scout.
     "IN-APP-ROP-RI-ATE!" She yelled. Francis threw up his 9 inch hotdog on scouts diy tube top. But no worries! She had another sock piece!!
     "Francis you idiot!!" yelled scout. She punched francis and tore away at his red sweater until a single thread became loose. Underneath the hole in his sweater, a purple stripe could be seen on his skin. "What is that!!!" scout screamed. Francis became uwu soft boy as he removed his sweater. A large pride flag was tattooed across his chest. A single chest hair protruded from the flag.
     "Im gay" he said sadly. "Im freaking gay."
Auntie alexandra was speechless. She didnt know what to say.
     "I thought your name was francis," atticus interrupted. "Not gay." everyone turned to look at atticus and he shrugged.
     "Francis! How could u???" alexandra screamed. "No grandson of mine would EVER be gay. Go sit in the corner and think about what you did." francis curled up like a baby and cried in the corner. He snapped his bf cecil with the crying filter. "I don't think we can do this anymore" he tagged it with these emojis:😪💔🏳️‍🌈.
Cecil quickly responded: "bby what happened???? Did i do something???"
"No bb its my gram. She's antigay. My uncys side isnt though so idk should i move in with them"
"U can move in w me, babe. I have a cow barn you can live with the rats i promise"
"omg bby r u serious??? ily so much"
In the reflection of the phone screen, francis saw an oh so familiar ugly lil face complete with an ugly lil tubetop.
     "Hey francis" scout said
     "Frick you and your gay dad"
     "My dad inst gay. My mom is dead remember lol"
     "Lmao ok"
     "Btw..." scout said, whispering. "My friend jem thinks ur cute."
     "Isn't he your brother"
     "He's in his goth phase rn. No ones his sibling. Atticus isnt even his dad."
     "Atticus cant be ur dad anyway because he's GAY"
Scout then smacked francis repeatedly with her vomit sock tubetop.
     "I BET YOU LIKE THAT" she screamed at him. "HUH? DO YOU?"
Francis just withstood the pain while chanting "GAY DAD" over and over again. Atty emerged from the corner of Francis' eye and looked at scout while scolding.
     "Scout, what are you doing?"
     "F-francis called you gay...."
     "i'm not gay. I am bisexual"
Scout had no clue what that meant but continued to sock (literally) francis in his stupid tattoo. "ATTICUS MAKE HER STOP"
     "IM NOT GONNA STOP FRANCIS" scout yelled.       "Not until you take back what you said."
     "NEVER!"
     With one final hit francis puked the squirrel up. Dill sat in the background amazed by the scene. He licked the last of his Babybell cheese off his fingers (don't forget the yummy red stuff). "Scout" he said sadly, "don't you think you're being irrational? Hes got a cut in his flag, does he need a bandaid" dill pulled out his bandaid from the market basket trip and plastered it onto Francis, who howled in pain. Taking off the bandaid would be the most painful experience of francis' life.
     Finally, uncle jack who we kinda forgot about pulled scout away from francis and offered scout a hot dog. She also got sent to the time out corner for abusing her cousin and got her animal jam membership taken away by atticus (she was very sad). Francis was crying and aunt alexandra had already left with her hubby and francis was alone lol loser.
     Atty had no choice but to bring him home with them. Francis bunked with Scout (jem was too emo).
     "Scout" whispered francis
     "What loser"
     "Atticus... is gay" and then he fell asleep.