Milan's bottom lip trembles as she looks at me, "I wish I knew my dad."
Her words make my heart stop.
"I know you told me that he signed his parental rights away but I wish I knew him." A tear falls down her face. "I wish he knew me and maybe he would want to be apart of my life. I love our small family but it's different because there will always be apart of me that I never knew. My dad gave me up before he even knew me and that hurts because I think I'm pretty awesome."
"You are." I nod my head as I set her phone down on the counter. "You're an awesome teen and a beautiful one at that. Every struggle that I have embarked on this journey of motherhood has been so worth it, having you taught me so much about myself and life."
"Do you remember his name?" She bites down on her bottom lip to stop herself crying and I nod my head. "Can we find him?"
"I don't know if that is a good idea." I softly tell her and she cries so I wrap my arms around my little girl. "I don't know who he is anymore. I don't know if he got married, had children or has a criminal record but what I do know is that I don't want him hurting you."
"I have live sixteen years without him." She looks up at me as I wipe her tears. "I think I can handle it."
"Ok." A tear falls from my eyes, "Ok, I'll see what I can do."
---
"In my thirty four years of life, I have worked a range of jobs to support my small family. When I first fell pregnant, I started working as a barista at a coffee shop before moving to a pizzeria." I look around at the audience. "Unfortunately going to college was not in the cards for me at that point so I had to work to provide for my unborn child."
Milan smiles at me as we lock eyes.
"My next job was at a Thai restaurant where I stayed for three years. The first year was spent working working the front of the house and the last two were in the kitchen so I could learn how to cook. Leaving that job was really tough because I had grown to love everybody there but I needed to level up." I smile to myself. "I was in my mid twenties at that point and I became an intern for a local fashion magazine but I started modelling part time because I moved into a two bedroom apartment so more money."
A few people laugh as I pull a face.
"My internship led to me discovering a passion for fashion but the dream of owning a clothing line would have to wait because I was saving up to buy a house. Through the internship, I was able to gain a few connections and my next job was as personal assistant for a fashion editor." I pause for a second. "It was the toughest job by far but it was equally rewarding as I got to attend fashion week and different types of events that allowed me socialise with people in the industry so I did that for a year and a half."
اوووه! هذه الصورة لا تتبع إرشادات المحتوى الخاصة بنا. لمتابعة النشر، يرجى إزالتها أو تحميل صورة أخرى.
Somebody raises their hand and I nod in their direction.
"Do you ever regret working as much as you did?"
"No." I shake my head. "Every job taught me a valuable skill that I was able to take on to the next job. My journey is that constant anchor that keeps me grounded because my life is completely different than it was fifteen years ago. I worked hard to put a roof over my daughter's head and there is no greater job than seeing her thrive in the life that I provided for her."
My talk goes on for another thirty minutes before I thank the audience and walk off stage. While approaching my daughter, I am pleasantly surprised to see my dad and sisters standing there.
"Tata." I throw my arms around my father and he chuckles as we rock from side to side. "I didn't know you were coming to my talk."
"That's why we call it a surprise." He tightens his grip around me before kissing my forehead. "You were great, sweetheart."
"I certainly learnt from the best." I smile as we pull away from as my older sister pulls me in for a hug. "Hey Marcia."
اوووه! هذه الصورة لا تتبع إرشادات المحتوى الخاصة بنا. لمتابعة النشر، يرجى إزالتها أو تحميل صورة أخرى.
"You were such a pro up there." Marcia laughs as we pull away. "Elon Musk is shaking in his boots."
"A bitch killed it." Daniella steps forward and I smile as I embrace my younger sister. "Long time no see."
"Yeah." I give her a squeeze since it's been months since we last saw eachother in person. "I'm really happy to see you."
"Same." Daniella sighs as we pull away.
"How did you find the talk?" I turn to my daughter who has her arm wrapped my father's waist and she smiles at me.
"You were awesome." She winks at me. "Let's go to dinner now, I'm starved."
"So am I." My father slides his arm around her shoulders as they walk ahead of us.
"What the hell is going on with her hair?" Marcia asks me as I take my phone off airplane and I shake my head. "Since when did she become a blondie?"
"I think it looks cool." Daniella comments and I roll my eyes.
"She's been acting out recently." I sigh as I rub the side of my neck. "Then today she told me that she wants to find her father."
My sisters gasp.
"He signed his parental rights away and in the last sixteen years, he has not tried to get contact with you." Marcia rubs her lips together. "Milan is going to get her feelings hurt."
"I know but she says that she's prepared to." I shake my head. "I'm not even ready to open that chapter of my life but I have to for my daughter."
