Chapter 31: The reason he is

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Zoe's POV



I woke up in the early hours of the morning and started pacing up and down. My mind was restless

I'm not entirely happy with all the decisions that I have made lately. I'm no longer half the person that I was. Being at home doing nothing the whole day was not the plan I had when I decided to have a baby. I had big plans, to even expand my café or move to the busier side of the city. I hadn't realized how pathetic I had become until now.

I needed to put my life back on track. My leg was almost completely healed, I could no longer feel the pain. The baby was in no danger at all. I needed to start working again.

My mind returned to the conversion Sebastian had with JoJo. I didn't know what I should do with that information. I wasn't afraid of telling Alexander but would the information do him any good? I hadn't expected for JoJo to lie to him, perhaps she really did it for his own good.

My phone vibrated on my bed side, I was shocked to see my brothers name on the screen.
He never called me, I hadn't even spoken to him in awhile. As far as I was concerned, he was probably out of town.
I still needed to thank him, he was the one who recommended the doctor at the fertility clinic. Maybe I needed to punch him since he was party to blame for all my problems right now.

"Hello," I spoke softly into my phone.

"I couldn't sleep," Noah answered softly.

"And you suddenly remembered you had a older sister," I said sarcastically.
It's not as if I had bothered to call him either.

"First of all, I'm older than you, by an entire thirteen minutes. Secondly, we last saw each other last thanks giving. We should meet up, I have a surprise that I think you might like." He insisted.

He was right, we hadn't seen each other in awhile. Besides, he always made me feel better about myself because every time we met he always found something even dumper to do.

"Fine, be here early.  At least by six a.m. I'll text you the address." He said.

He hang up the phone before I could protest about the time he expected to see me.
It was just after five, I needed to get going. I also had to consider the time it would take to drive to his place. Who expects anyone to woke up this early on a Saturday?

Although I had been feeling restless, I suddenly got the urge to sleep.

I showered then wore a comfortable pair of jeans. I didn't plan on eat, I wasn't used to eating this early in the morning.

I went downstairs to find that it was completely quite, everyone must have still been asleep or away for the weekend. I didn't want to wake anyone either, I'd just inform them of my where about later.

It didn't take long for the taxi to arrive.
I sat in the back seat and watched the people already walking in the streets. I kept rubbing my eyes to stay awake. In no time, I had arrived at his new apartment.

I had to ring the door a couple times before he finally opened.

He looked sleepy with his eyes half closed. He wore a faded green t-shirt and gray pants.

"What are you doing here this early?" He asked in a sleepy tone.

I couldn't tell whether he was being serious or if this was one of his sarcastic jokes.

"You asked me to be here!" I exclaimed.

"I didn't actually expect you to be here on time, past experiences told me otherwise."  He answered. "I went back to sleep after our call" He added.

"Since when am I ever late?" I asked.

"Most women are, especially pregnant ones." He commented.

I pushed pass him and entered the house.

While I was short with brown hair and brown eyes. My brother had dirty blond hair that looked golden in the sun, dark grey cat like eyes and was tall and athletically built.
My grandmother always used to say that God worked so had on Noah and completely forgot about me. By the time he finally realized, he was exhausted.

He has always used his good looks to his advantage. Like I used to say, the worst kind of a man is one who knows that he is good looking. I discovered my brother was a man-whore at sixteen. I made the mistake of not knocking on his door and found him in the act with his then girlfriend. The next day he was with someone else.

"I'll shower while you help me pack some bags in the kitchen." He instructed.

He went to his bathroom without explaining what the bags were even for.

I sighed and walked to his kitchen.

There was hardly any space to walk, cartons of juice boxes were laying on the floor, along of three boxes full of cookies and several bags full of different fruits and other snacks.

I waited for him to return, I didn't know exactly what it was that I was expected to do. I wonder what stupid thing he was up to now.

"You haven't done anything!" Noah exclaimed. He walked in with his hair still wet.

"You didn't give any clear instructions as to what exactly it is that I'm supposed to do." I answered.

"You are here to help me set up some bags. Just some small little packages, we donating food to children at a local shelter." He explained.

That was nice of him.

"Is this the surprise you had for me? Did you ask me to come and see you because you missed me or because you wanted someone to help you whom you wouldn't need to pay?" I asked.

"A bit of both," He answered truthfully. "Now come on, we have to get going." he rushed me.

We had to pack each of the different items into paper bags. Everything including the sandwiches were already prepared, all we had to do was put things together and close the packets.

"It's really nice to see you finally start to grow up," I said breaking the silence.

"Yah, I had to eventually." He mumbled.

He was definitely hiding something, I've never seen him this quiet.

"How is Sofia doing?" I asked.

"Sarah won't let me see her." He answered after a brief pause.

"Why? What did you do this time?" I asked.

"It was all just a stupid accident. Anyways, I don't want to talk about it." He said dismissive.

If he didn't want to talk about it, it meant that something serious must have happened. I'd have to talk to Sarah to find out.

"Anyways, how are you and Mr. rich guy doing." He said making a kissy face.

"We not doing anything," I answered dismissive. "He seems to have a lot of ghosts from the past and I don't think I want to deal with all of that. I feel like I have to constantly tip toe around him." I answered. "Then there is the issue of his parents, I should have asked when I had the chance."

"If it's something that important, why don't you just google them?" He suggested. "If they really were that important its bound to be online."

"I thought I was the one with the brains!" I exclaimed.

I reached out for my phone in my jean pocket.

"No, do that at your own time. We have to deliver this in less than an hour." he said blocking my hand.

"Says someone who was still sleeping." I protested.

"You know I never do anything on time." He said.

He had a point. I'm sure helping those children was more important than whatever google had to say about Alexander's parents.

We continued packing the bags.

"I know it might not be my business, but I think the best thing for the two of you would be for you to be away from each other. I know this from experience. You just too different and you clearly have your own issues to deal with. You'll never be able to raise that baby together. You bound to destroy each other." Noah said.

"But we are in a good place now," I muttered keeping my eyes down.

"But how long till something happens, it will just end up blowing up in your face." He reasoned.

I know he was probably right, but there was a part of me that wasn't willing to let go.

We continued packing the bags. In half an hour, we had done about sixty.

"We finally done, I'll take these to the car." Noah said.

He first places all the bags into one big box then carried it to the trunk of his car.

"You can stay here if you'd like. I'd only be gone for about an hour or so, then we can go for lunch or something." Noah suggested.

"No, I'd really like to see the kids." I insisted.

I followed Noah to his car, we did nothing but listen to his poor taste in jazz music.
I was relived when we finally arrived at the place.

The place was isolated with three separate buildings that looked like houses. The place was surrounded by a fence. Behind it, there was a big empty park.

I rang the door bell while Noah held the box.

A middle age woman with bright red hair greeted us then welcomed us in. 
We walked too fast for Noah who looked like he was barely holding up.

Once we arrived at the reception, the woman took the boxes from Noah.

"The kids are going to be so happy." She spoke.

Another lady came to us and offered to be our escort.

"Would you like to have a tour of the place?" The lady offered. "I am Danielle by the way," She informed.

Noah looked at me for approval.

"Yes, please." I answered.

We had to switch our phones off as we were not aloud to take any pictures or recordings of the children because of some privacy rules.

Apparently the children were currently having breakfast which is why the place sounded so quiet.

Danielle led the way and gave us a tour of the place.

In one of the bedrooms, a little girl was cooped up in the corner. Her shoulder length blond hair was covering her face, she also had her thumb in her mouth.

"Alisha, why aren't you having breakfast with the others?" Danielle asked.

Alisha did not reply, instead she started softly crying to herself.
She looked around six years old.

Danielle walked to her and went on her knees.

"The other kids are making fun of me because all my front teeth are gone," Alisha sobbed.

"Don't worry about them, you look perfect. In no time your teeth will start to grow back." Danielle tried to reassure her.

My mind suddenly returned to my childhood days. I remember when we made to take some family portraits and all my front teeth were gone. I refused to smile in those pictures, so instead I looked constipated. The worst part is that it's one of my parents favorite pictures. I don't even know what happened to some of my teeth, the last I remember was that I was having dinner and suddenly they were gone, I think I must have swallowed them. Of cause I also lost a great deal of my teeth while fighting with my brother. I didn't really get the chance to live through the whole tooth fairy fantasy.

"You are actually quite lucky," I spoke up. "At least you still have your bottom ones." I added.

I walked over to her and sat on the floor with her.

"You should have seen my pictures. Besides, this just gives you the chance for new perfect ones to grow in. Maybe your front teeth won't be at big as mine." I continued.

She let out a laugh. "Your teeth are big. You look like you have bunny teeth." She laughed.

"That makes sense, now I know why a love carrots so much." I joked.

I escorted Alisha to the dinning hall were all the other kids were. I sat amongst the teenagers and had conversions about high school.

After the kids were done with breakfast, I took the younger ones to the park. They were so sweet and adorable. I don't regret having my baby but I should have chosen to adopt. In a none creepy way, I felt like I could take all of them home with me.

When it was time for the two-year olds to nap, Noah was reading bed time stories to them.

Most of the kids just wanted someone to listen to them, it helped me to be grateful of so many things.

Later on, I had a conversion with the director. They relied on donations to keep the place open, they have been having fewer donations and were barely holding up. It's a shame how people who really do have money and can change the world choose not too.
It made me want to be better, I haven't been doing enough either.

It was around six p.m. when Noah and I decided to leave. It was nice finally doing something after such a long while. I definitely planned on coming here again.

I was strapping my seat belt when Noah received a call from his friend who asked for help on preparing some sandwiches they planned on donating for people sleeping on the streets. The voice sounded so familiar. I was glad he was finally surrounding himself with positive people.

Noah unwillingly agreed to help out. He was chasing around the small kids the whole day, I could tell he was really tired.

"Should I take you home?" He asked.

"I could help you out if you would like, I had a great time doing something for once that wasn't for myself." I suggested.

"You should probably get some rest. You know, with your condition." He said pointing out to my pregnancy.

"You sound just like every other man. You make is sound as if it's a medical condition." I snapped.
I've been bored for a very long time that  I'd be glad to do something especially if it helps someone.

"All right, fine. I just don't want you to over work yourself." He said defeatedly.

I smiled as we drove to our next location.
Thirty minutes later, we arrived. I knew exactly where we were.

We were at the house of one of Noah's high school friend, Jason. The house still looked the same from about seven years ago. If Noah's friend, Jason was still as playful then I was up for a long night.

I hesitated before following Noah to the door.

Jason's mother opened the door for us, it took her a while before she finally recognized me.

The last I heard, Jason still lived with his mother. Even though he was well off and was running his own business, he knew just how much women hated the idea of a man who lived with his parents so he used that excuse to avoid any commitments.

"Zoe!" She exclaimed. "I haven't seen you in a very long time dear." She squint her eyes trying to get a better look at me. "Everyone else is already in the kitchen," She continued. She gave us further instructions and offered that I join her for a movie if I got bored talking to the guys.

In the kitchen all three of his friends were there. I looked at them for awhile, trying to recall all their names.

"Clinton, Blake and Jason," Noah whispered over my shoulder. He could tell I had completely forgotten who they were.

Jason immediately walked over to me. "Sweet, more beautiful than ever Zoe, how are you?" He said flirtatiously. 

Jason then took my hand and placed gentle kiss.

The rest of the guys rolled their eyes. Jason never changed. I can't believe I had forgotten him, he always loved making an impression on people.

"Oh so you a still a whore-rrible person," I said playfully.

He looked at me confused, it took him a while to get it. "I see what you did there." He admitted.
He then put his hand over my shoulder.

"Leave her alone Jason, she is pregnant." Noah interjected.

"Really? What am I going to do now with all the pictures I pined on Pinterest of how our babies would have looked like?" Jason said.

I pushed his arm off my shoulders laughing at his comment.

I then greeted the rest of the guys.

"Zoe, you famous now. I saw you in the news papers." Clinton said.

"Not as famous as you," I said.

The last I heard, he was in the real estate business like his father and doing pretty well.

Noah took a red apron from the cupboard. The guys hadn't even started on anything.

Turns out neither of the four of them combined knew how to make a decent sandwich. It was either that they added too much of the one ingredient or the whole thing looked like it was about to fall apart.

"Why didn't we just pay someone to do this?" Clinton whined.

"Because Blake doesn't know how to say no to his girlfriend," Noah answered.

"You don't know how scary she can be," Blake added.

I ended up having to be the coordinator of his whole operation, inspecting each and every sandwich. Jason's mother just laughed as I gave all four of them instructions, she even joined me in scolding them at how terrible they were. I sat around and ate while they did the work.

Who knew that sitting around and talking could be so exhausting.

It must have been around ten o'clock when the band finally decided to call it quits.

Clinton offered me a ride back home as Noah could barely keep his eyes open.

Clinton and I spent the entire car ride reminiscing over our high school memories. He didn't attend the same school as my brother and I but they were in the same soccer club, I used to see him every weekend.
I remember when I used to have a crush on him, I'd get goosebumps whenever he even as much as blinked my way.

He opened the car door for me as I arrived at Alexander's penthouse. I felt like I was walking back into my reality. I hadn't even realized how late it was. Clinton waited until I was gone before driving off.

I tried to open the door to the penthouse as steadily and quiet as I could be.
I felt like a teenagers sneaking in at night.

To my surprise Alexander was still awake, wide awake.
He looked as if he was in a hurricane for several hours before it finally spit him out.

A few of the furniture weren't in there rightful place.

I knew I was up for a tough conversion.

"Where were you the entire day?" I could tell he was trying to be calm but it just wasn't happening.

He didn't even give me a chance to settle down before throwing questions at me.

"I was.." I began.

"Your phone was completely off. What's the use of having the stupid thing if you don't even use it!"
He didn't even let me finishing, by now he wasn't even pretending to be calm. "You didn't even tell anyone that you were leaving, all the security camera saw was you getting into some cab. I thought someone was threatening you and out to kidnap you or something. I was out looking for you the whole day."

"As I was about to explain," I said calmly. "I got a call from my brother this morning, we went to a children's home to hand out some food parcels. I had to switch my phone off there, I completely forgot about it. After that, I was helping my brother and his friends make some sandwiches for homeless people. I lost track of time." I explained proudly.

HE took a brief pause running his hands through his hair.

"There are a lot of poor people in the world who are starving, that’s none of your business!" He yelled.

I can't believe how little he thought of everyone else, I had expected anything but this.

"You can't even do one stupid thing right, all you literally have to do is make sure that baby is born health. I always have to be around to fix your mistakes." He scolded.

He made it sound as if I was an object, as if having this baby was my only purpose.

My own father has always spoken to me with respect, why should I allow him to disrespect me? I have given in to his demands for far too long, I don't have to take any of this from him. Not anymore.

"Maybe you need to stop being so selfish, this isn't just about you anymore." He continued to yell.

"If I was being selfish I wouldn't be here. You are unbearable to be with. Maybe if you weren't so controlling you wouldn't be so alone and cold. The people around you would actually love you!" I yelled. I knew I  had gone a little too far, but there was no turning back.

"If I was so unbearable maybe you should just leave," He yelled back.

"I will, and good luck being alone." I yelled.

I glared at him for the last time then matched upstairs.
I slammed the door shut then throw myself onto the bed.

I was done putting up with his toxic behavior. People threat you based on how you want them to treat you. I've constantly excused his behavior but this time, I had had enough. I hope he will just disappear from my life completely. Maybe if he died in a car accident I wouldn't car.

Minutes later, I heard a soft knock on my door. I lifted my heard up staring at the door, I was too upset to talk to anyone.

Before I responded, JoJo walked in. She closed the door behind her as if we were meant to have some secret conversion.

I took a deep breath and sat up straight.
She was probably here as Alexander's spokes person.

"I couldn't help but over hear your conversion." She begin.

"If you really here to defend him maybe you should just leave, I'm too upset right now." I said calmly.

"You should also try to understand him Zoe, he was really scared." She spoke.

Understand him? I tried to explain the situation to him but he wasn't willing to listen. I'm done with putting up with all of his bad behavior. If I was trying to avoid him, I would have blocked his number a long time ago.

"I tried to reason with him, he wasn't listening." I said.

JoJo sighed then took a seat on the bed beside me.

"He was just fifteen years when he lost both his parents." JoJo began. "His mother had such a big heart you know? One evening his parents were out in the evening handing out blankets and food to some people sleeping on the streets when suddenly a gang fight occurred. He lost both his parents that night. Worst of all, his mother was pregnant with his sister. All of his is just a defense mechanism for him."






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A/N: I hope you enjoyed the chapter,please tell me your thoughts on the story.

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