𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐃𝐈𝐆𝐀𝐍 | 𝐍𝐎 𝐖𝐀𝐘 𝐇𝐎𝐌𝐄

VI. THE GRIEVANCES OF A PARKER

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"So, do we just wait here or...?"

The two Peters exchanged a glance and the older one turned to Maia, squinting at her. "Yes."

"That's sad." Maia frowned. She held Amy in her arms though, which was comforting.

"I still can't believe you have that cat."

Maia shrugged at him. "Her name's Amy firstly, so use it. Secondly, she's my child and I don't abandon my children."

"So you just randomly take in cats?"

"And dogs!" Maia gave him a thumbs up. "Though, I don't do dogs. The last time I did I nearly -"

"-collapsed since you had a bad allergic reaction." The Peter that looked like her Peter said. "Yeah, I still remember when Aunt May was freaking out at me for letting you bring the dog in."

"So that happened to your dead me then?" Maia grinned, her teeth showing. "Did the whole bee sting incident happen as well?"

"Oh when you went into Anaphylactic shock when you were seven?" The Youth Pastor Peter asked. Maia nodded. "You'd bring that up whenever we had anything with honey in it."

"So I am cool in your world?" Maia beamed.

"No you just hold grudges."

Maia sighed heavily, cooing at Amy for a moment and then remembering she couldn't put the cat down since they were literally on the tip of a building and not on safe ground. "How long is this going to take?"

"I don't know."

"I say we just swoop in, say hello and start helping."

"I say we wait."

"No."

"Yes.

"No."

"Guys!" The younger Peter yelled, though didn't actually yell. "Just-just calm down, Mai."

Maia smiled at the familiar nickname.

Looking down was weird when she was in view of a clearly heartbroken teenage boy who looked to be her age. He looked defensively at each of them, especially Maia. They all jumped down collectively, Maia being more wary for Amy's sake. When she got down, she immediately placed the cat down and then held her hands up so that she looked to be in surrender.

"Wait, wait, wait, woah!"

The older Peter spoke first. "Sorry, about May,"

Then Look-a-like Peter added on, "yeah, sorry," there was a look of devastation on his face and Maia knew half of the reason that look was on his face. "I've got some understanding on what it's-"

"No." This world's Peter asserted immediately. Maia decided on labeling him Peter 1. Peter 1 looked to be in a mess of a state. His face was stained with a red tinge of blood and his eyes carried burdens. He was heartbroken. "Please don't tell me you know what i'm going through."

"Okay..."

"She's gone and it's all my fault." He paused. "She died for nothing." He moved his hand to reach for the box-thingy MJ was grasping and Maia could tell this was the thing that would send them all back. "You don't belong here. None of you belong here... those other guys are from your worlds. So you deal with it. If they die, if you kill them, that's on you." The Peters all nodded. "That's not my problem, I don't care anymore." He looked completely and utterly done with everything. Like as though his heart was physically dying. "I'm really sorry I brought you all into this. But you have to go home now."

He went to move for the button but MJ moved it from him.

Maia decided on speaking up. She didn't know how to console him but she wanted to try, "in my world, you die." Her voice was quiet. "I replay that moment constantly. To you, this world's you, I'm a complete stranger but in my world you were everything to me. You were my big brother and we did everything together." Peter 1 frowned at Maia's own grievance. "When you died, I was fifteen. It was my birthday and you died and then I became Spider-man because I knew you didn't want Spider-man dying with you."

Then Peter 2, as Maia dubbed him, spoke, "my Uncle Ben was killed. It was my fault."

"I lost Gwen, my-uh-my MJ." Peter 3, or the look-a-like Peter started. "Before that I lost my Maia, or her," he gestured towards Maia. "I couldn't save neither of them and I'm never going to be able to forgive myself for losing either of them." He reached up and wiped his nose quickly. Maia looked down, realising herself that they both carried the weights of losing the other. "I tried to keep going, tried to keep being the-uh-, friendly neighbourhood Spider-man because I know that's what they both would've wanted. Maia always said I was her favourite hero." He sounded so tired. "At some point I stopped pulling my punches, I got rageful. I got bitter. I just don't want you to end up-like-like, me."

"The night Ben died, I hunted down the man who I thought did it." Peter 2 began explaining. "I wanted him dead. I got what I wanted, It didn't make it better." He breathed out heavily. "Took me a long time to learn to get through that darkness."

He was noticeably brighter in comparison. Sure his eyes were dull, but they looked brighter in contrast to Maia's or Peter 3's. Maia hoped he managed to find peace somewhere.

She felt as though her story was incomplete in comparison to the other Peters and so Maia decided to tell more of her story, she decided to let herself be a little bit more vulnerable, "my Peter, my brother, got shot. I remember that night more than I remember his face now." She fiddled with her hands, trying to calm her nerves down. It was something her Peter taught her. Peter 3 recognised it as something his Maia did that he taught her. It was painful seeing his little sister so sad, yet he didn't comfort her because no matter what he would never be her older brother. "For ages I was absorbed by police investigations happening that I began neglecting everyone I loved. May, Ben, my friends, even my health. Everything didn't matter. I just wanted revenge. At some point, I ended up hacking into a Police file and finding out they had identified the killer and planned a house raid at some unknown point." She sniffled and some tears did fall down her cheeks. She felt so exposed and vulnerable but she knew her MJ would be proud of her for crying. She deserved to cry. "And so, with that, I found the man who murdered my brother. I wanted to kill him. I wanted the people who loved him to feel everything I felt. But I couldn't kill him. I just couldn't and every day I wonder what would've happened If I took that gun and shot him like he did to my Peter." Maia's voice cracked, "he had a family though. I couldn't put a kid in my position ever. But yet, I still wonder if I should've just killed him."

"I wanna kill him." Peter 1 swallowed. "I wanna tear him apart. I can't still hear her voice in my head." He sniffled. "Even after she was hurt, she said to me that we did the right thing." He sniffled while breathing heavily. "She told me that 'with great power-'"

"'comes great responsibility.'" Peter 2 completed, looking at Peter 1 with a slight bit of amazement that their dying family would say the same thing.

"How do you know that?"

"Uncle Ben said it, the day that he died." Peter 1's gaze was sorrowful at the recollection, but now hope was there. "Maybe she didn't die for nothing Peter."

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"what's the softest way to say you took away my friend, my buddy."
- maia about peter and peter about maia

I FEEL SO BAD FOR THESE BABIES-

parker's don't get happiness

also updates will be less frequent since i has covid last week and this week i start school again.

anyways enjoy the angst besties