Just a one-shot That being said, enjoy, Dick Wolf owns.
She knew weeks ago that she needed to let go again. Sever all ties, all wants, and she tried. She was determined to forget about their all-encompassing re-introduction to each other. From the moment she saw him again, she knew that she'd been sucked right back into that game she'd spent so many years playing, only to lose again and again. Loving Elliot Stabler. She'd been there so long that she didn't think she'd ever been able to let go. But when he left, suddenly she was free. Miserable, but free, and feeling like her whole world had walked out on her when he did.
What am I going to do without him?
She remembered that she asked herself that question every day and night until she didn't anymore. And by then she had just given up on love and now, she simply focused on raising her son.
But then suddenly, three weeks ago he was back and she couldn't remember the last time she felt so infatuated with anyone; especially someone that she hated. Elliot Fucking Stabler. Maybe hate was too strong a word, but there were so many unresolved feelings!
He'd tried explaining what happened to him, where he'd been all these years but she didn't want to hear it. She had shut out that part of her life- the part where she was the one that cried over him. The part where she'd always forgive and take him back. She couldn't be that woman again and she told herself that she didn't care where he'd been, or what he was doing because whatever his reasons were, there were telephones. Telephones that he never once picked up to let her know that he was okay, much less alive despite the many times she'd called him.
Since then, they'd run into each other coming and going. It was awkward- they'd say a few words to each other, try to keep it light but it was clear that they both wanted to say more and it was heartbreaking for both of them when they’d walk away at the end of their run-ins.
One day against her better judgment, Amanda showed up at her apartment and convinced her to go out. She’d noticed how down Olivia had been for weeks and she wanted more than anything to cheer her up.
“Amanda, I’m fine!”
"You're not. Noah's with Fin for the night and we are going out!"
Olivia had said no until she was blue in the face, but Amanda wasn’t buying it. She nearly dragged Olivia off the couch and forced her to change out of her pajamas amidst cries of “I’m tired... I’m not in the mood.” And “I think I might be coming down with something...” But Amanda was a trooper. She was determined that Olivia would get out of the house and after forcing her to put on a dress and comb her hair, they went out to Citrus for dinner where, damn her luck, she ran into Elliot who was there for a business dinner with some colleagues.
Looking at Olivia, who now seemed unnerved, Amanda couldn't help but wonder just what went on between the two of them. Fin told her that they'd been partners what seemed like a lifetime ago, but he wouldn't say more, even after he'd almost come to blows with the man. And, now with Olivia trying to sit here and cope miserably with his presence.
"What happened between the two of you?"
Olivia looked up from the wine glass that she was in the process of draining, "What are you talking about?" She drained the glass, turned it straight up, and reached for the bottle to pour another.
"I'm talking about this," Amanda said, referring to the absolute mess that Olivia was becoming. "The train wreck you're becoming before my eyes."
"I'm not," Olivia insisted as she continued to sip.
“We can go,” Amanda told Olivia, and maybe Olivia should have listened. With the way Elliot was staring at her from across the room as she was him, this was not a good situation. Elliot downed all of his scotch and she couldn’t drink her wine fast enough. They had never run into each other in a casual setting since he'd reappeared and it was painful for them both, though they tried not to let it show. Halfway through dinner, after looking into his eyes yet again, she had to get out of there and quickly got her coat and did just that as her tears threatened to get the best of her.
