poppies (lester averman)(INDEFINITE HIATUS)

chapter twenty-one

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chapter twenty-one: the l(oss)oml

a/n:

TWS — DISORDERED EATING BEHAVIOR, UNDERAGE DRINKING, BAD DECISIONS, THOUGHTS ABOUT CHEATING, ANGST

disclaimer... I have never been to the uk.

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While the staff gets the Ducks situation into rooms of their own, Rory sneaks into the kitchen, grabs a scone, and fills the inside with a few too-big dollops of clotted cream and strawberry jam.

It tastes so good that, for a moment, she feels like she's doing something wrong. There hasn't been any calorie counting or intentionally denying herself food in years—— despite what everyone seems to think, the several therapists she was forced to see worked and that, even though she learned addition reading the nutrition labels on all of her snacks, she doesn't read them anymore—— but, as she chews, her face pinches with the undeniable urge to stop.

She forces it down, anyway, swallowing gags down with gulps of water from a bottle, and rationalizes all of this with the fact that she's never drank this much alcohol in one sitting.

(And if her hands, clammy and cold, are shaking from too much exercise, not enough food, and the deep-rooted terror in the face of her declining mental state, then that's her business and no one else's.)

When she looks up, her stepsister is leaning against the doorframe and smiling wolfishly.

"Hey, there, pukey——"

"Your dad told you not to call me that."

It's petulant, she knows, but her mind is swimming too much to come up with anything real to say.

Tara's smile only widens as she pushes off the doorway. "Yeah, well, daddy dearest isn't here, now, is he?"

Rory clenches her jaw. Tara walks—— no, saunters—— around the counter toward her, stalking Rory like she's an injured gazelle out in the open, but Rory isn't afraid. This is how things have always been.

Even when they were children, Tara was always like this.

Taller, prettier, meaner.

(Her mother's idea of a perfect daughter, Rory thinks. Especially since Tara already had a mother and needn't rely on Janis for anything at all.)

"What do you want?"

"Your friends are boring——"

"They're not my friends."

Something tightens around Tara's eyes. "Well, they're boring nonetheless, and I'm tired of moping around the house."

Rory briefly wonders what her stepsister did to find out they were so boring.

"What do you want me to do about it?"

"Convince them to come to a party with us."

"Us?" Rory echoes, laughing mirthlessly at the audacity. "I'm not going anywhere."