Broken beyond Repair

Truth part 1

Oh right. I'm bisexual.

This has been the worst truth of my life. I've been reminded of that every single day since i came out. Not only my school mates, my mum , my dad, even my teachers. would you believe that? I used to be a straight A  student, favorite of my teachers, my mum loved me, my dad did too. 

But that one party, Nick grimshaw, and a kiss, thats all it took to change my life into a living hell. 

It was a saturday night. I never went out to any parties, but i had too, how could i deny my school crush? I had a crush on nick for as long as i can remember. We were really good friends. But when we were at the party, he left me alone. So i did what anyone would do. I downed beers and alcohol at a speed i didnt know existed. Well i was smashed out of my mind, and tried to find nick. i saw him grinding on some chick. I took him by the collar and into an empty stall Then. I did something i never thought i would do, something that changed my whole fucking life, all my relations. 

I kissed Nick Grimshaw. And he kissed me back.

That was- well i dont remember. It was just a kiss, nothing like what people describe , no fireworks no butterflies, nothing. those are just books anyway.

But then someone took a picture of us and posted it. Funny thing, only my face was visible, but whatever. 

The next day, it was when i got the first blow. The moment i entered the school, I was slammed against the locker, and the guy in front of me was none other than nick. The guy i loved. But then, he leaned in and whispered in my ear.

"I love you baby but just go with it. I promise i will make up to you"

Punch

Did he just confess?

punch,kick

NICK GRIMSHAW LOVES ME HOLY SHIT

Punch kick kick slam thud

All i remember from that day was the confession and the pain. Thats all.

The next day, i was at the hospital, my mum by my side. 

"Harry honey what happened, zayn called me and he was the one who bought you to the hospital, he found you passed out near the lockers. Who did this hun?" She was sobbing. My mom loved me to death. Key word : Loved.  

This was the time to reveal the big truth

"YOU WHAT? YOU KISSED A BOY? THAT IS DISGUSTING HARRY EDWARD STYLES.!!" That was the beginning of the end of my family. ha. Oxymoron.

The next 2 days. I was in the hospital. No one came to visit me. My father came in the 3rd day to check me out and take me home. It wasnt home anymore.

After months of fighting, abusing and hating. My dad left us. My mum blames me to this day.  Me too. After all he left because his son liked dick more than vaginas. Huh. After that, my mum turned into an alcoholic, new guy every other day. I havnt seen her really, i'm never home when she is and visa versa. 

Nick never stopped hurting me. But he used to make up for it. The sex was good. But i wanted more than that, i wanted to be his and i wanted him to be mine. But of course Nick didnt want to come out. Well i'm happy he  didnt  cos i couldnt see him hurt. He even had a cover up girlfriend who i hated with passion. 

My mum wasnt paying for school anymore so i had to get 3 jobs, working overtime.But somehow i syill stayed the straight A student , even tho my teachers ignored my existence.

The only person that supported me all along, who stood up for me, was my best friend, zayn. That guy, I have no words for him. He was the closest thing i had to a family anymore.. He was strong as hell and he used to fight for me. He loved me. And i loved him. i still love him. He's like an older brother. Though he hated Nick from day 1, and we fought because of that. well, he was wittier than me.