timothèe chalamet imagines

Doubt

"Alright love, I have to leave" Timothèe says leaning over me, stroking my cheek with his thumb a bit before leaning down and kissing my forehead

"Have fun" I try my best to muster up a smile, hiding the fact that my insides feel like they're being stabbed.

"I'll try, I hope you feel better, text m- no call me if you need anything" he says kissing my lips quickly

"I will, take lots of pictures for me?"

He nods his head and leans down one last time and kisses my lips firmly, love oozing from his being.

"I love you" I say softly

"I love you more"

He walks out the bedroom and I can hear rummaging in the living room before the front door opens and shuts.

The tears immediately flood out of my eyes, unable to control them anymore now that Timmy wasn't around to see them.

You see, tonight was supposed to be an amazing night.

Timothèe moved to London almost 2 months ago to start filming his new movie. Two months ago I was unable to come with him because of my own filming schedule. But we arranged it to where I would go back with him after the met gala (we don't do great with long distance)

Tonight was the premiere for Dune and all of the cast was going to be there and at the after party. The plan was to go together and do the red carpet as a couple which we don't do often. We keep our relationship as private as possible because it's just simpler that way for the both of us.

But now, it's 7 pm. Timmys on his way to have an amazing night while I'm curled up in bed, attached to the heating pad and counting down the minutes to when I can take my next dose of pain pills that might just hopefully work this time.

Being a girl in not easy, we all know this. Periods suck. They suck so bad and they suck even worse for people who have different conditions related to their periods.

Pcos, endomitosis, endometriosis. They're all horrible and can even be life threatening.

I was diagnosed with endometriosis when I was 17. After years of having a horrible irregular period I finally went to the doctor to get on birth control. Which is where I learned the news.

I prayed the pills would work, and they did.

Until they didn't anymore.

At first it helped. My cycle became a bit more regular, cramps weren't as bad and I finally felt like a normal girl.

But then the bleeding started getting worse. The cramps made me sick, and I would have cycles lasting up to 40 days, no stops.

It was miserable.

I've tried every birth control in the book, none of them have helped.

I'm 24 years old. Timmy and I have been together for 5 years now. We met when we were younger on a film set where I was studying directing and he was acting. We instantly connected and it was like fate. We both lived in the same city, both had similar interests and personalities. And both loved each other dearly.

After 5 years together we've definitely discussed our future together. Marriage, houses, kids.

I never wanted kids before Timmy. Even up until last year I never imagined myself being a mother.

Timmy had told me from the very beginning that he wanted kids. Wanted that white picket fence life at some point. He never put any pressure on me and told me he would be with me no matter what. But now I see how amazing our life could be. Little me's or even better, little timothees running around. The only problem is endometriosis has knocked my chances of getting pregnant down severely.