FIXATION

NINETEEN

"Thought you were looking for an excuse to get me to hold you," he smirks as her cheeks warm underneath his palms. Her blush spreads to her ears as he sets his palm against her neck. She couldn't comprehend why his hands had been so warm compared to her. But she also couldn't remember a lot of things when he was leaning so close to her. That is until she remembered their explicit agreement and looked away fighting back lustful thoughts. He tsk's with annoyance, "the contract, yeah I know - stop looking at me like that Rose. But you're freezing over here, what am I supposed to do?"

"What you would've done a week ago before we made the contract." She reminds him and feels her shivers begin to die down. "Wait til the heat kicks on or just bare it out with me, I guess." She couldn't deny the temptation to slip into the back seat and explore all the ways the pair could properly warm up but they were still at school and the parking lot still had half the students in it.

He pulls his hands down to her own, squeezing them warmly. "Fine but when you die of frost bite, blame the contract, not me."

Once the car is warmer she unlocks their hands, shrugs from out of her jacket and loosens the scarf from around her neck. With the company only being the two of them, she doesn't see the point in hiding the marks. "Now that wasn't too hard, was it?" He reaches over to flick one of the dark marks.

"Steve walking around with hickies on my neck and being seen with you means a lot more for me than it does for you, okay?"

When he pulls away from driving out of the school parking lot he raises an eyebrow to question. A serious expression makes the rise of his eyebrow more intense, "and just what exactly do you mean by that?"

"I mean that I'm me and you're you." He gives her another look, encouraging her to go on. Her jaw is set. She had been trying to avoid this conversation but if he wanted to go there, then she would go there. "I'm a black woman and you're a white man. People see me as doing something wrong and you'll always be the King in their eye."

His features go soft, whatever anger was there before had evaporated into a somber expression. She hears him groan when he raises his hands to his face. "That never even crossed my mind, geeze..!" When his eyes are revealed their wide with shock as if Rosalie had plucked the rose colored glasses from his face. Now his head shakes as he begins to put the pieces together, "earlier those girls we passed in the courtyard, they saw us talking together and they whispered because they're"-

"They're racists, yeah. Honestly half the school is and that kind of thing happens all the time," she exhales and leans back into the seat. Her hand finds her forehead. She was glad that the conversation seemed to be going well, in her head she imagined Steve getting defensive and wind up gaslighting her. But when Steve was given all of the pieces of a puzzle he could see the bigger picture, eventually.

Steve still has the surreal look in his eyes and just as Rosalie's hand rubs his arm in support a high pitch ring feels her ears. Her groan is half-lived, because all she can focus on is the sound of Steve's voice in her head, I feel like a fucking idiot.

"You are an idiot, but don't beat yourself up too much about it," Rosalie jokes with him lightly when the ringing has faded from her ears. Steve looks away from the dashboard of his car to send a pointed look to his friend.

"Uh, I never said I was an idiot," he sits up a little straighter to squint his eyes, "out loud, at least."

She hears herself lie on the fly, "obviously you didn't but that doesn't mean that you aren't an idiot. And you are beating yourself up about it when there's no need, you know what to look at for now that you're aware. That's all that matters." She continues to move her jacket from off her body and tossing it into the backseat. Her hope was that if she kept him talking about the matter at hand she could keep his attention off her little slip up. Because she had definitely just read his mind. And couldn't talk about it or her head would explode.