𝐁𝐞𝐞𝐭𝐥𝐞𝐉𝐮𝐢𝐜𝐞

𝐎𝐧𝐞 : 1

𝘊𝘢𝘭𝘢𝘣𝘢𝘴𝘢𝘴, 𝘊𝘢𝘭𝘪
𝘍𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘴 𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘳...

"Hold that pose Alex" I heard Jeff, my photographer say as he looked at me and back into his camera. I held my hand flat against my neck tilting my face upward as I looked at the ceiling, I stood there holding the exact same position I'd was in before hearing a click following behind a bright flash.

"Okay, and done. Great work Alexandra" Jeff spoke, I looked over at him breaking my pose and bent down grabbing my robe that laid down on the floor.

I quickly threw it across my body and quietly nodded my head passing Jeff who busied himself flicking through his camera.

Sighing, I walked down the quiet halls and into my studio room making my way over towards my vanity chair after shutting the door. I took a seat and looked into the mirror that sat before me, my face immediately turned upside down as tears began clouding my vision.

Today felt like one of those days where everything just seemed to bothered me, I was having one of those days where I mentally felt drained but yet confused.

I woke up with all of my baggage hanging out of me making me worry and stress, more than I usually did which was always a bad start of any morning of mind. I'd figured that if I bombarded myself in my work and schedule that my mind would fairly enough get back into game mode but sadly that wasn't the case.

I felt every same emotion I've felt over time but only in a different-rushing type way. Like there wasn't any type of way to feel but one way along with being mixed with others.

Tired wasn't the word to describe the feeling I felt, though physically it was but more so exhaustion seemed like the more fit.

With being crowded with people who I hadn't found a reason to trust, forcing myself to have this great appearance which only became nothing but silent judgement—alone and scared was what I felt.

I didn't know why I was having such a hard time with coping my new lifestyle. Maybe because I didn't have to right people around me to guide me through it or maybe because I hadn't had anyone meaning that I was on my own.

That was one big pill I found myself being forced to swallow and always got sick when I did.

I grabbed a tissue from the Clean-X box that sat on my stand and gently but carefully cleaned my face from tears. I looked blinking my eyes eyeing my makeup that surprisingly didn't get ruin by my ugly cry and sniffed as I tried pulling myself together.