Holy shit

Mongoose Man

Mongoose Man POV

I was sitting by an enormous block of cheese that the Cheese King had sent me to guard, when a small ermahgerding shape teleported a couple of feet away from me. I sighed with anger.

"Shoo!" I yelled, and the feet scurried away, leaving me alone with the ermahgerd.

I walked up to it, staring at its supernatural frilly pink Earth dress. It was turned away from me and squeaking with Excitement. It soon turned into a squeaking competition, as Excitement insisted she could squeak louder. The ermahgerd soon gave up though, and let Excitement get the better of her.

I cleared my throat, it sounded like a gunshot. Cheese birds leapt into flight from the cheese-scrapers, but fell and slapped onto the cheesy ground when they found they couldn't actually fly.

Excitement jumped and turned.

"Geez, why do you make a gunshot sound with your throat? EVERY SINGLE TIME???"

"OMG IT A FURRY!" screeched the ermahgerd, which turned out to be a chihuahua.

"Excitement, it's been a long time." I said, stretching out my paw from under my long black suit.

"Mongoose Man." Excitement took it: shook it.

"WTF IS GOION ONNNN???" demanded the chihuahua.

"Well," I started. "It began like this..."