Where Do We Go From Here?

DEFINE 'FAIR'

Sana

As soon as I reached my room, I burst into tears.

Why did she have to make things harder than they already are?

I wiped the tears in my eyes and sniffed. I'm done crying for her, I should not cry for her anymore. That's what I've been doing for the past years.

When we first got into arguments, I had gone to my mother and my friends asking what to do because I feel like she's slowly slipping away from me. I know that things are not getting any better. We've been fighting tirelessly and I felt so alone, like I've never felt before.

They told me that all marriages had problems. There are parts in one's relationship when you thought that it would never get better. They even gave me examples like how my parents even went through some rough patches in their marriage. But they managed to succeed in protecting their family, because they know that at the end of the day, it's still each other that they want to see first thing in the morning.

So that's what I tried to do. I tried to hold on to our family. I love Dahyun so much that it physically hurts thinking that we'll be apart. I could never imagine a scenario like that. She and Jeongwoo were my everything.

Are. They are my everything. Up until this day. Dahyun is still my everything.

So I couldn't understand what happened two years ago, when she told me that she wanted a divorce, and that she knew it just wouldn't work anymore.

I really believed her when she said that we will stick together through thick and thin. I really thought that she loved me more than anything.

[ FLASHBACK ]

"I love you, Sana. I think that even death couldn't remove the love that I have for you in my heart. But I think that the best thing for us is to just go our separate ways. We can't have Jeongwoo grow up feeling the arguments between us."

"But you promised." I was crying so hard, "You promised that we were both going to be strong enough to go through these rough times together. What happened to that promise?"

"Nothing, Sana. I'm just tired."

I laughed out loud. "Oh, you're tired? Well, then go on, take a nap, Dahyun. God! What does that even mean? You're tired? Of what? Of me? Our marriage? Our child? The life that we tried so hard to build? Which part is exhausting for you?"

"Of fighting, Sana. I'm tired of fighting."

"Why are you so calm about us separating?"

"I'm not, Sana. But yelling wouldn't get us anywhere." she sighed as she pressed her fingers on her temple.

"So, are you trying to say that I'm being immature about all of this?"

"I'm not. You're just angry, Sana. It's understandable."

She looked at me with a melancholic expression that absolutely shattered me.

"You're giving up—"

"I am. I'm sorry."

______

A week later...

It was Dahyun's turn to take care of Jeongwoo today, and I glanced at the clock as I'm currently nervous. I thought about how Dahyun would react if she knows who will be with us during our trip to Disneyland. I know that I have a lot of things to do, but something tells me that I need to hurry to get Jeongwoo from Dahyun tonight. I don't care if my work starts piling up, but I just need to see my son now.