No Going Back (Nyck de Vries X OC)

In Rome

"Look mum it was fine. Nothing major happened," I end the small argument.

"I suppose I'll have to trust you," My mum responds. I hate the fact that she is still worrying too much. The thing is I have made it through six years of being in motorsports without any issues. We soon get to work on catching up. It turns out there was a lot that I missed. It makes the guilt from leaving worse. At the same time, I knew that I couldn't just abandon my career. Oh well, we will have to see what happens when we are finished in Rome. Thankfully everyone is quick to order.

"So Jess I have to ask but how did you find out about Formula E?" My dad asks.

"I found out through Nyck. After the rookie test, he suggested that I join Mercedes EQ and here we are," I explain. I am lucky that I didn't need to join the Japanese Super Formula. Not that I would have minded but I don't have to think about that now.

"One last question from me. Who would you say your biggest rival is?" My dad asks again.

"JEV for sure," I reply. I am always happy to answer my dad's questions because he has no connections to any media companies. It is the day after and I am glad that the mechanics were able to finetune the car. There is the added bonus of the other two practice sessions going well despite the drizzle. The drizzle has me on edge because it can turn to full-blown rain at any moment. I take a deep breath as I pull myself into the car. I will be one of the drivers with the greatest disadvantage. I will be going out in group one since I am at the top of the standings. I gesture for the mechanics to let me go. He returns the favour by releasing me from the pits.

"I just need to keep it clean," I utter as I get the car up to full speed. To my surprise, I am the first out. Someone had to be the first and as they say ladies first. I get to work on gathering momentum on my out lap. As soon as I cross the line I switch to the full power mode. Well here goes nothing. The rest of the group soon follow behind. I am quick to notice that I have a problem.

"Can someone tell the Porsche to back off? The margin for error is uncomfortably small," I radio in. There is no way that I can risk being caught out on my full power lap.

"I'll see what I can do. In the meantime just keep your head down," Comes the response from my engineer.

"Ok. I'll keep you updated," I respond. As soon as I reply my worst nightmare comes true. The drizzle becomes full-blown rain. Luckily for me, I am now on the in lap.

"Ok, I'm coming in. The rain is ridiculous," I announce. There is another reason why I am calling it quits for now. I don't want to trouble the rest of the team so I tell a white lie. As soon as I bring the car to a full stop in the garage I rescue myself from the car. I am hoping that my full power lap was good enough to at least get me sixth or seventh. I find myself watching the timesheet while drying off. I am currently sitting in third but that will change. After an hour of waiting, I find that I have been kicked out of the super pole shootout. The thing is I should be peeved but I now have to wait three hours until the race. I am praying that the conditions would have improved by then. There is a little bit of doubt nagging at the back of my mind but that is due to the fact that I have to keep myself safe. I have decided to make the mad dash to the hospitality area so I can fill my mum and dad in while having a bit to eat. Instead, I am intercepted by Nyck. I can see the worry on his face. It doesn't take long for him to take me somewhere more private.

"Nyck what's wrong?" I tentatively ask.

"Sorry but I need to know if you will be ok," He replies. Yup, he is checking on me. Not that I have a problem with it. It shows that he cares.

"The thing is I am not sure but I promise that I will be fine even if all hell breaks loose. PS you don't need to worry about checking on me," I try to be optimistic about my response. There is no point in stressing too much even though there are some nagging doubts at the back of my mind. I find myself gripping Nyck's hand as we leave our private spot. Press be damned. I have given up on denying that there is nothing between Nyck and I. We are quick to make it to the hospitality area where I am greeted by my mum. She is white with worry. I am quick to try and calm her down.

"Mum I promise that I will stay safe," I look her in the eyes to let her know that it is not an empty promise. After two hours of waiting the rain has reverted back to being a drizzle. At least I have a reason to be optimistic despite the dodgy circumstances. There is a lot going through my head as I wait. Will I be able to keep my promise or will one of the other drivers do something stupid? Could there be a safety car? These are only some of the questions going through my head as the minutes go by. It doesn't take long for the thirty-second countdown to begin. I know because the engineer holding the umbrella over my head has moved. Here goes nothing.

"Radio check?" The voice of my lead engineer comes via the radio.

"Loud and clear," I say. My mind snaps to the task ahead. It will be the longest forty-five minutes of my life.

"Good luck," My lead engineer concluded the radio check. I take a deep breath as I try to get some heat into my tires before the lights go out. I will have to be careful. A second later I notice that the lights are on. Three...Two...One. As soon as the lights go out I hit the accelerator. My start was good enough to get me past the BMW of Max Guenther. Now I have gained a position. After ten minutes of an established rhythm, the attack mode activation area is now open.

"Jess you should hold off on taking attack mode for now," My lead engineer confirms my suspicion. It doesn't take long for disaster to strike. I have spotted the telltale sign of a crash. There is debris and my steering wheel is indicating a full course yellow. It turns out that Nyck ended up hitting a puddle while trying to get past one of the Envision Virgin cars. Dammit. Now it is up to me to get across the line. I suddenly freeze. Not now. I can see the image of the wreck of my brother's car. I am brought back to reality by the slight wobble in the car. I am able to regain control.

"Jess the safety car will be deployed this lap," My lead engineer announces. I am not surprised.

"Is Nyck ok?" I ask. I know he should be but I can't help asking.

"Yes, he had a collision with Robin," He confirms. Ok, at least Nyck is ok. I soon spot the familiar clump of cars as we all slow down for the safety car. I should have some time to gather my thoughts before we get back to racing. I have a challenge in my hands. I have to keep Max Guenther behind me whilst trying to overtake Nick Cassidy. After three minutes of waiting, I am about to get the news that I want.

"The safety car will be in this lap," Comes the news. Thank goodness. I am quick to bring the car up to speed.

"Shall I take the first attack mode now?" I double-check.

"Go for it," Comes the response. It doesn't take long for me to get the attack mode boost. Now is my chance to get past Nick Cassidy. I get to work on trying to get past. It doesn't take me long to encounter the same puddle as Nyck. Instead of losing control like him, I am able to slip the car around the remaining Envision Virgin car. I am sure my mum won't be happy with that but I needed to get past. Now I am in third place. I have decided not to bother with gaining any more positions because the available energy is slowly creeping away. Plus I will be on the podium anyway. After another twenty minutes of driving the race has come to an end. I may not have won but I still had fun considering the events that have happened. I got to show my mum that it was good that I stayed in Motorsports. After the podium ceremony, I am back in the garage.

"See mum I was able to keep my promise," I announce as I pull her into a hug.

"I'm sorry that I forced you to choose between your career or family. Are we all forgiven?" My mum asks tentatively.

"Well I can't truly forgive you but I am sure we can work on it," I responded. There is no point in holding grudges. We are soon joined by Nyck.

"Nyck are you alright?" Now it is my turn to be worried.

"I am fine. Just annoyed that I hit the puddle," He replies. It is funny how some people like me have good luck and others like Nyck and Robin have the worst luck. Well, I am happy that I am on the path of healing now. I soon realise that I am still on top of the standings. We shall see if the lead remains. My luck is bound to run out eventually.