Searching for Happiness (Lauren Cimorelli x You)

Stubborn

Y/N's POV

..."Today was the day Allison died." I sigh, leaning back further into her for comfort. I don't think I've ever seen Lauren look so angry in my life, but she tries to suppress it by readjusting her arms around me. Holding me tightly and whispering comforting things in my ear as I try not to cry again.

     I turn in her arms so I could lay my head sideways on her shoulder. It was easy to tell just how angry she was by her breathing but, like always, she managed to stay calm, rubbing soothingly up and down my back.

    Even though I already know the truth, I feel the need to justify my anger. I snatch myself out of her grip and stand quickly. "How can you be so chill about this? He literally did this to hurt me emotionally, since he can't do it physically. How can you just sit there and act like everything is going to be ok?" Lisa jumps in at my outburst. "Y/N! That's enough. We're all angry, she is just trying to-" Lauren interrupts her. "No, she's right." She stands up in front of me angrily.

     "I'm forcing myself to stay calm just to try and relieve some of the stress on you. But honestly, I'm pissed, Y/N. Is that what you need to hear?!" Lauren shouts. "I am pissed beyond comprehension that someone is willing to go to such lengths just to try and cause you more pain! I'm pissed that he hurt you the way he did as you grew up! I'm pissed that he thinks he can still control you now!" She yells as she runs her fingers furiously through her hair.

    "But what I'm pissed off most about, Y/N is the fact that you can't see that he can't control you anymore. You don't need him in your life. You have a family RIGHT HERE that loves you and cares more than anything about you, but you don't know how to accept it. I understand it's hard; you can yell, you can cry, but why would you hurt yourself?" Lauren asks as she gestures down angrily to my injured hand. "And why are you trying to pick a fight with me? What more do I need to do to prove to you how much I'm in love with you?"

    Tears are pouring down both of our faces as she releases her built-up anger. We stand face to face glaring at each other angrily. Watching her eyes slowly soften, I can see how much truth is behind what she just said and I bow my head in shame.

    I can feel the stunned eyes of Lynn, Christina, and Lisa, as they look on. I take a few breaths to calm myself before I look back into her beautiful brown eyes. "You're in love with me?" I ask shyly. Lauren moves to wrap her arms back around my waist. "Yes, you stubborn dumbass." She smiles brightly at me. "I love you too," I say quietly, still in shock at what she just admitted.

    "Are you coming? We're starving!" We hear Dani yell out the back door. "We're coming!" Christina yells back to her. "Start without us. I'm going to clean up Y/N's hand first." Lauren tells her family. "We'll be there in a minute."

They nod, Christina passing Lauren the first aid kit as they all make their way back inside. Lisa giving me a small hug before she races to catch up. I sit down in a chair as Lauren kneels in front of me with the first aid kit. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have gotten mad with you. I'm just so pissed and he's not here for me to yell at. I took it out on you and that's not fair." 

    "It's fine as long as you don't make a habit of it... and no more punching walls!" Lauren scolds me as she cleans the wounds with a disinfectant wipe. I lean forward and kiss her softly on her forehead. "I promise, I won't do that anymore."

    I hiss a bit from my stinging knuckles. "I'll have to wrap it. It's still bleeding. God, you can really throw a punch." She laughs slightly. "What can I say, I box at least four times a week." I shrug. "You're lucky you didn't break it." Lauren sasses back.

    After she was done bandaging it, she pulls me up to stand in front of her. "I really mean it. You know that, right?" Lauren says as I pull her closer to me. "I know." I smile as I lean in for a peck. "I love you too." Lauren beams as our noses bump.

    I feel her arms tighten around me, creating zero space between us. Feeling her soft breath on my face makes my heart race. I see her glance down, almost begging for me to kiss her again. My lips meet hers, gently showing her just how much I need her.

    Moving in perfect sync, I feel her tongue slide smoothly in between my parted lips. I'm surprised at first, considering we were standing in her parents' back yard but I melt into her touch. 

    "Oi!" We pull apart swiftly and look over to see Dani in the doorway. "Do that later! Dad won't let us start without you two." Dani smirks as she heads back inside. "I'm not hungry, I'm craving some more of that right now." I chuckle as Lauren looks flushed, grabbing the first aid kit and my uninjured hand before leading me inside.

    As we eat, Dani keeps glancing between me and Lauren. "What is it, Dan?" Lauren asks, getting annoyed with all the looks. "Can we talk about the elephant in the room?" She asks. "What elephant?" Lauren rolls her eyes, she knows exactly where this is going.

    "Why did you and Chris leave us today after those envelopes were delivered, why is Y/N's hand wrapped, and why were you yelling out back earlier?" Dani's curious look is directed directly at the two of us. "Dani, it's nothing for you to worry about," Lauren says uneasily, reaching under the table to place her hand on my thigh. "It's fine, they can know." I sigh as I look down at my food.

    Lauren stares hard at me for a minute before looking around the table at her parents and all her siblings, especially the younger ones. Lynn catches her helpless look and speaks up. "Are you sure, Y/N?" She double-checks. I just nod at her in response.

    "Ok. Well, Y/N's father... is not someone she needs in her life. He only cares about his campaign and has sent Lauren and the band cease and desist orders to keep their relationship off the internet. The orders are bogus, more of a scare tactic, so we have nothing to worry about." The younger kids just look on confused by her words, but the older ones were able to make assumptions. They all gave Lauren and me sympathetic looks.

    After dinner, everyone slowly makes their way out the door. Lauren is walking with me to my car, surprising me as she climbs into the passenger seat. "Do you want me to take you home? Where is your car?" I ask, cranking up the engine. "I rode with Amy to work today and no. I'm not leaving you alone anymore today." She smiles warmly as she takes my hand, pulling it into her lap. "I don't know about you, but after today all I want is to cuddle and fall asleep in your arms."