GLAD YOU CAME

18

My whole body is shaking as I take my way to the parking lot. I am beyond furious and what I found out today was the least I expected to hear from Tay.

When I told Gun that I'll be going to Tay's place as Off told me he's working at home today, he was kind enough to lend me his car. While on my way to Tay's place, a lot of questions are running through my mind. Like what's stopping him from reaching out to me? Who is Lee? What's his involvement in all of this? And if we are still good? But I am very willing to understand whatever reasons he'll give me.

Just knowing that he's doing okay and knowing that we're still good will be fine with me so I brush all those negative thoughts on my mind because I should give Tay the benefit of the doubt. After all, I decided to start trusting him when he told me he respects my decision and will let me take my time. Not everyone can do that.

Opening up to the kind of life I had to him was hard because I don't even know if he'll be able to handle everything lightly like Gun and his family. Tay and I are living on a very different level of life and I won't blame him if he chooses to leave me once he hears my story so I'm glad when he said that he'll give me time.

But, I never thought that he'll do something about it behind my back. Was he so unsure about me that he wanted to run a background check about it? Am I not worth waiting for? I felt so betrayed that all the hopes I built for us while driving to his place washed out in an instant.

"New! New please!"

I heard from behind the moment I was supposed to enter Gun's car. I am a crying mess but this time, the way I look doesn't even concern me at all.

"Babe, listen to me"

Tay pleaded as he held my wrist. I refused to look back at him. I can't.

"New, let me explain"

"What kind of explanation will you give me?"

I asked, pulling my hand away from him. He seemed surprised seeing how furious I looked.

"You told me you respected my decision and will be waiting for me to get ready. Am I a joke to you?"

"Babe, no"

"Then why?"

I asked and he kept quiet.

"Was that the reason why you've been avoiding me? You found out about my background? How messed up my family was? You don't want me anymore? Fine! Let's break up!"

I initiated and I saw panic on his face.

"What? New, no! Babe please just listen"

He begged, holding my arm and stopping me from entering Gun's car. I pushed his hand away harshly which almost caused him to stumble.

"I shouldn't have believed in you. You're just like anyone else"

"New please, don't listen to what you heard from Lee. I didn't do that because I'm not sure about you. God knows how certain I am for you—"

"Do you even trust me?"

I asked, cutting his words. I don't even want to listen to another lie from him.

"Of course I do"

"Then why didn't you wait when I told you that I'll be telling you about my life once I am ready?"

"New—"

"Just answer the damn question, Tay!"

"I want to understand you!"

He said and everything seems to be more unclear to me.

"I want to help you"

"Bullshit"