If you're leaving tomorrow, Just remember the times why we stay (ONGOING)

All My Very First

Not all stories are the same. May mga kwentong papaiyakin ka, pakikiligin at may ialn ding tuturuan ka ng aral. Every story has its own wonders na kahit na sino satin ay walang nakasisigurado kung ano ang plot twist nito. Katulad ng kwentong ito, malamang sa malamang aakalain ng lahat na katulad lang ito ng mga napapanahong mga libro na sumisikat mostly sa mga kabataan. But little did they know that all our desire of ending a story are all the same but what is more important is what happened, what happened before our happily ever after or our tragic ending. Our story is just the same but different at the same time to other stories. Hi, I am Lia and this is our story.

Entering a 'live in partner' life is not that easy as you think. Lalo na kung hindi kayo parehas financially stable. Sobrang daming pagtitiis and patience ang need mo to get through all of it and syempre dapat magkasangga kayo ng partner mo habang hinaharap ang bawat pagsubok. The most important thing is having each other in all kinds of situation and shortcoming that might happen in yourlife and between the both of you.

I started living with Kyle when I was 19 years old. Right after I quit my first ever job sakanya na ako umuwi without any concent from my family. Sa mga panahong iyong din kasi nagkalabuan na kami ni Mommy just because of a small thing na sobrang big deal for me. I'm suffocating that time, sobra yung pressure to the point na pati sarili kong gusto ay hindi ko na din alam dahil lahat ng ginagawa ko ay dapat sangayon at pasado sakanila bago ko gawin.

Honestly speaking? I'm not happy with my life being with them. Obeying them. Even my mental health is not considered, like what most of our parents said, "Kaartehan mo lang yan". It hurts as fuck to be honest na sarili mong pamilya ang unang taong tumalikod sayo sa mga oras na kailangan na kailangan mo sila. The reason why me and my Mom is not in good terms those times ay dahil lang naman sa desisyon ko about sa school ko. I'm planning to stop for just one year to refresh and restart, I know sayang sa panahon but as usual they don't understand. What I wanted is so simple, suppor and comfort kasi I'm still thinking twice pa naman that time pero mas lalo niya lang akong di-nown.

That's the reason why I ended up going home in Kyle's house. I have no hesitations while I'm on my way. Kahit katiting na kaba wala. Buong-buo na desisyon ko that time, I have no regrets doing such an act. Ang natatangi kong nararamdaman sa mga oras na iyon ay ang pagkalaya ko, oagluwag ng hininga at pagkapanatag ng isipan. Nakahinga ako ng malalim sa mga oras na pagkahigang-pagkahiga ko sa kama ni Kyle.

"Pahinga na tayo Ga'... Gisingin mo ako ng mga quarter to 6 pm" Bulong saakin ni Kyle bago niya ako niyakap ng mahigpit at hinigit bago siya tuluyang nakatulog. May pasok pa kasi siya, pang-gabi kasi yung shift niya sa work niya bilang isang call center agent. This is the first minutes we are already they also called 'live in couples'. At that point I know I'm already home, that I know I already found my peace and hoping that to all the shortcomings in my life this would be the one who'll be my permanent, that is already for good.

Mahirap umasa ika-nga pero wala namang masama sa umasa sa bagay na matagal mo ding hinintay na mangyari sa buhay mo. The way that I look at his lovely brown eyes adn kissable and attractable lips I know that I love him more than that, more than what I see and can touch. I have that one specific reason why I know it is more than that visble things in my eyes. Pero sa ngayon hindi ko pa alam kung ano yung bagay na iyon. What matters now is to cherish this game changing moment I'm experiencing right now.

Sa sobrang pag-iisip ko hindi ko na namalayang nakatulog na rin pala ako at pagkagising ko ay agad kong tinitgnan ang oras at nakita kong mag aala-sais na pala kaya ginising ko na si Kyle dahil baka ma-late siya sa trabaho. Pagkatingin ko sa maamo niyang mukha ay napatigil ako ng mga ilang saglit para pagmasdan ang bawat parte ng kanyang mukha s aiba't ibang anggulong maaari. I soflty touch his cheeks and kiss him gently on the forehead to his lips. Pagkatapos nuon ay dahan-dahan niyang minulat ang kanyang mga mata sabay ngiti saakin.