Five

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My mother didn’t come in to bug me while I was eating breakfast.

Thank.  God. 

Though, I did see her skittering back and forth down the hallway.  She was wearing yet another pair of heels – these were a navy blue suede wedge – and I could hear her steps echoing throughout the house.  Kennedy’s steps were less distinct, as she always wore converse, though the styles varied once in a while.  Allie was never without a pair of flip flops.  When she had to wear heels for weddings and things like that for her job, she always kept an extra pair in her purse or camera bag. 

I usually wore sneakers in the summer and boots in the winter.  All of the females in my family had their various styles.  Aunt Claire used to always wear Birkenstocks.  Dad (yes, I realize that he is not female) always wore his work boots because he owned his own construction company with a friend, and he never knew when he might have an emergency and need to leave for a job site. 

Eventually Mom did come and find me, choosing to just give me a look instead of giving me The Talk for probably the millionth time since she had arrived.  The sad thing is that I considered myself lucky that all I got was a look.  She sat down at the table with me; I had been reading on my kindle, a book I had read at least two times before, just to be reading something to pass the time. 

“Yeah?” I asked.

“Nothing,” she said.  “Did I see what I think I saw earlier?”

“What do you think you saw?” I asked her, just to be irritating.

“A tender moment between you and Grayson,” she said, a secret smile on her face.

“If you thought you were witnessing a tender moment,” I asked, “then why would you interrupt?  Because that’s what I thought happened.”

“So I did interrupt something!” She couldn’t have seemed more pleased than if she had shouted “AH HA!” with the whole jumping up out of her chair and pointing at me thing too.  I resisted the urge to chuckle and instead just shook my head at her with a small smile on my lips.

“He apologized for being rude,” I said to her.  “He offered the hug so that everything was considered good between us.” 

“And you took him up on it?”

“Mom,” I said, lowering my voice in case Grayson was anywhere nearby.  “Have you seen the man?  Why wouldn’t I take him up on it?”

The smile on her face was pure, unadulterated evil.  “Glad you realize the attraction.”

I shrugged and put my kindle to the side.  Mom was given my full attention as she stared at me with those intense eyes.  She didn’t say anything, just stared at me.  Those laser beams trained on every nook and cranny of my facial features, looking for anything that might give her a hint toward feelings or even the slightest taste of a chance for a match for me.  I understood that she wanted me happy, but that didn’t necessarily mean love and babies. 

“Mom,” I sighed.  “You're doing that thing again.”

“What thing?”

“Where you try and set me up.”

“Oh,” she responded, flipping her hand in the air, “that thing.  I always do that thing.”

“Yeah,” I said to her.  “I know.  You do it to me, Ken, and Allie.”

“It’s natural,” she defended.  “Like sex.”

I choked on air.  After a few moments of coughing, trying not to die, I responded, “You cannot be comparing talking about settling down and sex!”

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