Chapter 5: The Mental Breakdown

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AS and his khadoos senior came to M.P.T. Everyone was doing their work as they just got scolded by HM for not doing it.

(I don't know his name so we will call him DO. Doodh wala officer)

AS and DO: Jai hind!

Every body: Jai hind!

KS: sir app dono yaha!

DO: Ji! Hame Miss. Malik se baat karni hai. Bulaiye uunhe!

SS went and called HM.

HM: Jai hind sir!
AS and DO: Jai hind!
AS: Haseena ji, Hame aapse ye uummed nahi thi!
HM: (completly ignoring AS) Kya huwa sir aap yese, yaha. Is there any problem?
DO: Aap problem pooch rahi hai jab ki problem hi aap hai?
HM: Excuse me sir!
DO: YOU ARE A COMPLETE FAILURE, MISS MALLIK! (rudely and in-front of everybody)
HM: But sir aap pehle meri gaalti to bataiiye!
DO: Gaalti jaana hai tumhe? Tumhari wajha se ittni badi gadbad ho gaee, aur tumhe pata nahi hai? Constable! News channel lagao.

CC opened the t.v and all news were showing the same thing. "Bomb blast in MUMBAI". Then DO turned off the t.V.

DO: Ye bombs ki responsibility tumhari team ki thi right?

HM: yes sir. (bowing her head down)
DO: To ye wala phata kaise?
HM: Sorry sir. Isspe kaam chal raha tha.....
DO: Kam chal raha tha? Tumhari aak lapar wahi ki wahje se hum ne 2-2 kabil officers kho diye. ye to accha huwa ki hamne poora ilaka seal karwa diya tha aur civilian ko kuch nahi huwa. Mujhe tumse khoi ummed hi nahi thi. Ye to SK sir ne mujhe rook liya, nahi tumhe kaab ka iis mission ke nikal wa deta! par aab nahi. You are out from this mission Now! Abhi tumhari jagha Anubhav kaam karega. GOT IT!
HM: Yes sir.

Then AS and DO went from there. Nobody knew what just happened except HM. Only she knew the truth. KS was going to ask about it when HM's phone rang. It was SK sir's call. She immediately picked it up.

HM: Jai hind! sir. (her voice was changed as if she was going to cry any minute now.)
SK: ....................
HM: no sir! I am not crying. Network problem ki wajha se aawaj aaisi hogayi shayad.
SK: ............................
HM: no sir, iski koi zaroorat nahi hai. Meri hi galti thi. Mujhe hi dhyan rakhna caheeyetha. And you know what! He is right. I didn't deserved that post....... respect and ....and everything. He is right. He was always right.....I WAS A LOSER......I AM A LOSER.........I WILL ALWAYS BE A LOSER.
SK: .................
HM: Thank you for your concern sir. But please Jagga ko mat bataeeyega.
SK: ................................
HM: Yes sir but, You can't change the truth that uus wakth bhi gaalti meri thi. Lekin, agar Millian uunka beta lagta tha to wo mera bhi to kuch lagta tha right?..aur unse to bohot jyada lagta tha.
SK: .................
HM: Sorry sir.. And it's...it's okay. Jai hind sir!
SK: ..........

All of them were listing her word on the call very carefully. KS was finally going to ask to HM. But, HM said Jai Hind and went out of thana without even turning back. All of them were again left confused and shocked.

HM rushed to the jeep and went to her house. She was drowning in the pool of guilt. DO's words were ringing in her ear again and again. She finally reached the house. She bang the door and went to bathroom. She took a shower and got out of bathroom wearing t-shirt and pajama. She was just drowning more deep and deep in the ocean of guilt.

She was lying on her bed for half an hour. Then she finally got up, opened her cupboard took out 3 bottles of alcohol and started to drink. She drank all three bottle of alcohol. She cried for few minutes very badly a then she got up opened her drawer took a injection and went out at the park near her house. As it was night, no one was there.

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