sexy ace attorney one shots[crackfic]

y/n x klavier gavin because he is a sexy beast

y/n pov
hi im y/n. im just your average girl with long h/c hair that goes down to my feet, big throbbing bright e/c orbs, 2'1, z cup titties and a giant butt. now you may be asking why im dating the sexy beast known as klavier gavin, a ex rockstar prosecutor who is very hot and manly and sexy (and totally not cheating on me with a better person who is a man). it's because i broke up with my (now) ex boyfriend monokuma who is 30 times sexier than klavier and he was jealous that i was dating the sexy bear so he told me that i should date him and i said yes because i was very poor.

time skip brought to you by my fathers foot fungus

klavier pov
i fucking hate y/n with a passion, ja? she is such an ugly hoe and she can't compare with the sexiness of mein liebe herr forehead's scrumptious, large, moist (justin trudeau approved), wide, lickable, sweaty, throbbing, creamy forehead. she is a musty azz hoe who should be euthanized. i've told her many times to "baddie 😂😻💐🧚🐉😍👅🦶 without the bad" but she won't listen cause this bitch is still alive ong if she doesn't go away i will drive to the vet and put her down, ja? she only wants me for my sexy german accent and to make monokuma jealous because i am hotter than him. she also steals my credit cards and buys ovipositing dildos and decorative pillows and since im sexy and famous people hack into my bank account and cancel me on twitter for her strange purchases. unfortunately i have to take this rancid smelling foot fungus extra chromosome ugly moist (justin trudeau approved) h/c wearing bitxh out on a date because if i don't she will stab me because she's insane and quirky and ungirlboss

y/n pov
oh em gee i'm going on a date to mcdonald with klavier gavin he is so sexy but ofc he can't handle me because i am a dahlia hawthorne and kokichi kinnie so i'm quirky and have massive honkers so he can't resist them. we go in the mcdonald's and i order the bts meal because i know the bts meal poo is not going to be smooth like butter like a criminal undercover and he has a shit kink. he orders 30 big macs wnd eats them nikocado avocado style and by that i mean he inhaled them in like 30 minutes which was so arousing and made me so wet my panties were marinating in my pussy juices

then i had a realization

i shat on klavier .

- what the fuck is wrong with you

- ungh yes zaddy klavier punish me

- i'm gay and cheating on you kys

i'm so brocken and sad and deporeson 💔💔💔💔💔💔 DHMU GOING DAKR 🥀🥀🥀🥀STREAKS🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤i'm so emu