Truth and Awakenings

Emily's Confession

"Excuse me, Agent Prentiss?" Dr. Hsu from earlier had called Emily, who was sitting in the waiting area. "Agent Jareau's out of surgery. Is her husband here?"

"He is," Emily answered, standing up. "He just stepped out to call their kids. Is she ok?"

"She lost a lot of blood, but she's currently stable."

Emily nodded, shoving the fact that she lost a lot of blood into her compartments. "Is she gonna be alright?"

Dr. Hsu shrugged, looking at the woman with concern. Even though she now knows Emily and JJ were not actually a couple, she saw how anxious she felt for the blonde. "We won't be able to assess whether or not she sustained any neurological damage until she regains consciousness."

Emily nervously licked her lips and picked at her fingernails again. "Um, could she hear me if I talk to her?"

"It's unlikely."

"Is it ok if I see her for a few minutes?"

"Sure." The doctor guided her to the room JJ was currently resting in.

Once Emily entered the hospital room, she silently gasped at the sight of JJ. She was still unconscious and recovering from her surgery.

"If you need anything, just let us know," Dr. Hsu said and Emily thanked her before she left the room.

The unit chief made her way towards the hospital bed and studied JJ resting on it. The blonde had one hand crossed over the other and was steadily breathing. Emily internally beat herself up for letting an agent and one of her best friends get injured. Standing up straight, she took a small breath to calm her nerves and push aside her blame.

"You're gonna make it through this. I know you are. God, I was so worried about you. I- I didn't want you to get hurt. This whole thing's my fault. If I hadn't make it, I don't think I could live with the guilt after. I'm so sorry, JJ. I was afraid that-" Emily lightly shook her head once and quickly licked her lips, "that you wouldn't..."

She rapidly blinked her eyes and took a sharp breath. "I don't know if this is a good time to say it or if you could even hear me right now, but... I never had the chance to tell you that I've loved you. For a very long time. I thought I would get rid of whatever feelings I had towards you because you seem so... unattainable. Why would you even want to be with me anyway? You deserved better than me, JJ. That's why I wanted you to go to Will because he's a good guy."

"You know, the day you got married? I don't know why I'm asking you this, it's ridiculous, you probably won't hear me anyway," she scoffed to herself, remembering that JJ was still unconscious. "I wanted tell you then. But I saw how happy you were and I didn't want to ruin that. But- I don't know, maybe it's just my wishful thinking, but I c- could've sworn, you were looking at me, too."

Emily frowned deeply to stop a sob from escaping. "I put so much trust in you that I never would have with anyone else. I spent almost my whole life playing a part in someone else's fantasies, that I never knew what I wanted for myself. It's so different with you. I feel like I could just be myself around you. No one's ever cared for me the way you do. You made sure I felt safe and comfortable, at first I thought you were just that kind but you were only doing your best to show that I was loved, too."

Emily took this moment to close her eyes and slightly tilt her head back, sniffling. She puffed her cheeks to let out an exhale and looked down again. "When you wake up... I'll just move on with the rest of my life, knowing that I've finally gotten this off my chest. You'll go back to Will and everything will go back to normal. All that matters is when you wake up, that I get to spend more time with you. Because I don't know what I would do without you in my life. All I want is for you to be happy. Just... please don't leave me, JJ."

The older woman sniffled again and fanned her face for a second before wiping her tears away. She stroked JJ's hair with a thumb and softly placed a kiss on her hairline. Making her way towards the door, she glanced back before leaving for the waiting area.

JJ slowly opened her eyes and blinked a few times, the room coming into focus. Her eyes darted around the room as she tried to find Emily, but found no one there in front of her. No, wait. She definitely heard Emily's voice cracking towards the end of her speech. She loves me?

JJ smiled to herself before going back to sleep, feeling confident enough to finally tell Emily how she feels about her.