Out Of Wreckage?

Chapter Thirty Six

Dear Diary.
I want to be brave but I know I'm far from what I try to be. I make promises but I tend to somehow break them. I wish to recuperate but I end up failing again.
I'm surviving but I want to live.
This is suffocating me.

I stopped writing as tears cascaded down my face.

I gently wipe it.
Just when I thought that everything was going smooth, he was there to even crush the last ounce of hope.

Yesterday, I gave up the job I loved because of him and his temper.
He got fired from his work again but I'm the one who is facing the consequences of his actions.
We're in desperate need of money but with him at home, I can't allow Gaurav to be in the same room as him. With his thirst to have a son, he can do anything to the little boy who doesn't belong to him.
I couldn't have risked anything happening to my child then how can I think of my monetary benefit and let Gaurav stay here in such a violent and disturbing place.

It was tough but Chhavi understood my helplessness.
It was futile to even talk to a man like Aslam.
Everyday was a torture and at night, it only got worse.
I locked my daughter in our room just to keep her away from him.

The only time when I felt as a free bird was while I went to pick and drop Bushra.

I could meet Nida after school who was the only one who realised how miserable I was.

As far as Hamza was concerned, I didn't hear from him at all.
Once or twice, I tried to reach out to him but he didn't answer any of my calls.
Last time he had mentioned that he's going to stay in Lucknow.
Maybe he just got busy. Anyway, I can't leash my sorrows on him.

I closed the diary and hid it behind my pillow.

Surprisingly, Aslam seemed in a happy mood when I went in the living room.

He didn't break any crockery, he didn't hit me and he didn't throw any fuss around.

I was partly relieved yet I knew he was upto something.

While I was preparing lunch, he stood by me.

"I've a guest coming today. Make something nice and tell your daughter to behave. I can't risk this opportunity." He uttered.

I heaved a sigh.

"Anything else." I asked, crossing my hands against my chest.

"Slow down your attitude. I want this job and I've pulled a lot of things to get this man convinced for an opportunity. Otherwise be prepared to sleep on streets." He raised his voice while pointing his finger at me.

I just gave him a curt nod before getting back to my kitchen duty.

I cleaned, moped and dusted every nook and corner after I had the food prepared
Aslam needed this job and we needed the money. Our savings were almost over.

I quickly dressed up in the finest clothes I had and Lastly, I covered my head with a scarf.

Bushra wore the dress which Hamza had gifted her on her birthday.

"Ammi! What are we getting ready for?" She asked me when I was combing her hair.

"We're expecting a guest today and we need to be polite and welcoming so that he can give your father a job." I told her with a hint of sarcasm.

"Okay." She smiled.

"That's it." I patted her arm before I heard the door bell.

Aslam sprinted towards the door to open it, himself.

My breathing hitched.

What was he doing here today?

Hamza was holding a bouquet and a bag.