NEW ORDER ─ star wars

VII. Torn Apart

There aren't many stormtroopers inside the station—they're all busy fighting the Tarisian and Mandalorian fleets—but a few remain, and I take great precaution to avoid them. I don't want anyone to know of my presence here but my son, and I can tell he's well aware of it; his conflict gets stronger by the second the closer I get to him.

I make my way down another two hallways before I finally reach him, and the sight of him makes me stagger backwards a step. My son is clothed in all black, donning a mask that resembles Darth Vader far too much for my comfort. In a holster on his thigh is a lightsaber with two cross guards, and I have no doubt the blade would be red if ignited. He looks so cold, so robotic...nothing like the kind, soft hearted son I know.

"Jayce Daulton," He says, his tone low and distant; as if I were a stranger. "I've been waiting for this day for a long time."

I take a step forward, then another, slowly closing the distance between us. "Take off that mask. You don't need it."

"What do you think you'll see if I do?" He asks.

"The face of my son."

I think for a second that he will tell me no, but he complies with my request; clicking a button on the side of his mask and tearing it off his head, revealing his stoic features.

I feel my heart stutter as I look at him. He looks just as he did the last time I saw him; I had been on my way to a meeting with Leia and Ragnar when Ben stopped me in the hallway leading to the throne room. He told me he thought something was wrong, that he desperately wanted to talk to me, but I told him we had to do it another time. I left him in the hallway, and I watched his eyes be filled with hurt as the doors to the throne room closed behind me.

I wish more than anything I had stopped and heard what he had to say. Maybe I could have prevented this.

"Your son is gone," Ben insists. "He was a scared, lonely little boy, so I destroyed him."

"That's what he wants you to believe but it's not true," I urge him to believe. "This is all just the Emperor—"

Ben laughs, but there is no humor in the sound, only pain. "Why am I not surprised? If you really want someone to blame, then blame yourself. You're the one who failed me. You're the one who couldn't have been bothered to spend time with his only child. You're the one who picked chasing a ghost over me. The Supreme Leader is the one who was there for me, who believed in me, who loved me. I'm finally where I belong. I am done with the Jedi, I am done with Taris, and I'm done with you."

I have been a fool; everything I did to try to stop the vision I had in the Sith temple from coming true, caused it to come true. If I had only ignored the vision, if I had written it off as a trick the dark side was using to confuse me...Ben wouldn't be on the opposite side of me, but by my side; where he should be.

I am a fool.

"The Supreme Leader is only using you for your power. When he gets what he wants he'll dispose of you, just like he did with Vader."

"The Emperor is not the Supreme—"

"Yes he is. This is all just part of his game, but you don't have to play a part in it. Come back with me, come home," I walk forward until he and I are only a foot apart, and then I say all the things I should have said a long time ago, "I was too blinded by fear to see that I was hurting you, and for that I am so sorry. All I ever did, I did to protect you and keep this exact thing from happening, and I'm sorry I was the direct cause of it."

Tears have now welled up in my son's eyes, his conflict worse than ever before. His reaction spurs me to cup his cheek in my hand and say, "I love you, Ben. I have always loved you, and I will always love you."

"It's too late." He whispers, a tear cascading down his cheek.

"It's never too late."

"I feel like I'm being torn apart," His voice is filled with agony so acute that I feel like I can't breathe. "I know what I have to do but I don't know if I have the strength to do it. Will you help me?"

"I would do anything for you." I tell him, and I mean it with all of my soul.

My son stares at me for a long moment, his breaths shaking as they expel from his body, the force surrounding him brimming with pain and agony.

There's the sound of a click, then Ben's face is shadowed in red as he ignites his lightsaber and sinks the blade into my chest.

"Forgive me." He whispers, his chest stuttering as he sobs.

I caress his face, a smile coasting my lips as I whisper, "I do."

Ben retracts his blade, his cheeks soaked with tears, and watches as my body falls backwards onto the cold stone ground. He then kneels down beside me and buries his head in my chest, clutching fistfuls of my shirt into his hands and sobbing.

I want to comfort him but I can't; I'm beyond that now. I'm beyond everything.

With my final breaths, I watch my son agonize over what he has done, and I vow that I will help him in my afterlife, that I will do what I failed to do in life; save his soul.

A warm, bright light appears above my son's head, and it beckons me towards it, guiding me to my fate. From that light, a female voice whispers my name; one I know without a shadow of a doubt; my mother.

"Jayce," Her voice is so nurturing, so loving. It makes the cold feeling spreading through my body thaw. "Jayce."

"It's time to join us now." A male voice joins. My father.

With a final breath, I reach towards the light, where I see the smiling faces of my mother and father, and I join them.