Creating Our Folds (Darkling x Volcra)

Putting On Pants

A/N I didn't edit this cause it's Sunday and I wanted to post but don't have the energy to edit. I think it adds something tho. Happy DSS!

Alexsander pulled up his pants, thankful he had finally learned how to do it on his own. Baghra used to help him, 550 years ago. Then, apparently, he was "too old" to get helped. 

Volcra would help him put on his pants though, sticking holes in the fabric from their giant claws. Maybe that was why Alexsander started wearing the kefta in the first place.

With 500 years between Volcra and Alexsander, Alexsander found himself wearing shadows instead of pants. They were simply easier to figure out. No one knew the difference anyway.

 It was good to wear pants again. 

Like a sign of a new beginning. One that this Aleena Starkhoff could bring. Was that her name? Alexsander had never been good with spelling. Or remembering the names of people he was supposed to care about. He simply didn't have the time to pretend to care.

Volcra was different though. Volcra's name stuck on him like it was the only thing that mattered to him. In a sense, it was. The only thing he valued more was his power. And tricking children into doing things for him- but apparently, it wasn't ethical to say that straight up.

Zonka, Genny, Aleena, Daveed, Evan, whatever Evan's boyfriend was named, did these people really matter to him? He thought for a second before ultimately deciding that, no, they didn't. They did help him get closer to Volcra though. And that tickled him pink. He almost had to change his pants he got so excited, but he was able to control his bladder for once. 

Stupid Aleena. 

If she hadn't used her stupid light powers maybe his message to Volcra could have been successfully delivered via human sacrifice. All for what, survival? How selfish of her to think of herself and Malk instead of him, Papa Darkling. Of course, she couldn't call him that. That was Volcra's nickname for him. 

Saints, how he'd kill to hear Volcra call him that again, which they would soon. This time, he had a grand romantic gesture planned. One that would knock Volcra's socks off...if Volcra wore socks. 

First, he had to get the ugly stag for Aleena. She seemed so excitable about it like she actually thought that she could destroy the fold with it. Haha! Foolish! 500 years of the fold, as if some girl could destroy it. 

Destroying the fold would mean destroying the one symbol that Alexsander had of Volcra. He would never let it disappear.

Alexsander looked into his mirror, falling in love with his reflection.

"Damn, Alexsander, you look hot today," He told his reflection, staring into his deep eyes before approaching the mirror, touching the glass version of himself. "You dressed up for me? Yeah? Saints, look at all that ass. Double cheeked up. Have you been working out?" He ran a hand down his thigh, feeling satisfied with his ability to put on pants once again. Then, he closed in on his reflection, kissing the glass softly, letting his hands touch the glass, getting smudges all over the once clean glass. Oh well, he'd get some poor civilian to clean it. As long as they knew he was getting laid, even if he wasn't. 

The truth was, Alexsander hadn't been getting any action. He was like a chihuahua who was meeting a new person- peeing all over the place. It made sexual encounters extremely awkward, especially when he started sobbing out of embarrassment as he struggled to clean up for himself.

He finished making out with his reflection, wiping his lips with his hand. He hoped Volcra would be able to tell he had been practicing when he saw them again. 

"What the hell are you doing?" Evan asked. Alexsander contemplated what his name actually was, but gave up, flustered by the fact he was there. How long had he been there? Didn't he have better things to do like bully Aleena for not doing her job? 

"Evan-" Alexsander stuttered, brushing his hands on his kefta. "Look, I got new pants! I put them on all by myself." He flexed, revealing his pants through his kefta. Evan looked shocked and offended at this gesture. "I mean, I put on my pants, all by myself, like I usually do. Like I have for the last 500- I mean, last 17 years. I mean, I didn't put them on myself when I was a baby, but-"

"It's Ivan," Evan corrected, a stern look on his face as he crossed his arms. "Were you just making out with your mirror?" 

"N- no! What kind of ridiculous assumption is that? I get tons of action but keep projecting, Evan." 

"It's Ivan. Come on Darkling, I can see the lipstick smudges all over the mirror. They're at your height." Alexsander looked at the mirror and cursed himself for not taking his lipstick off first. His stupid luscious lips. Always causing problems, just like Volcra had told him. 

"I suggest you get out of here before I feed you to Volcra- I mean before I feed you to the volcra. Plural. Many volcra. Say, is that Aleena chick single?"

Evan pressed his lips together, seeming to get more confused with every sentence that left Alexsander's lips. How preposterous!

"Do you want me to answer, or do you want me to leave?" 

Alexsander thought about how much time he would need to take his pants off again. If he wanted to get in bed before 8, he needed to start now. 

"Get out. But tell Aleena to hit me up." 

Evan simply nodded, closing the door as he left. Alexsander let out a sigh of relief before looking in his mirror again, tucking a piece of hair behind his ear as he looked flirtatiously into his reflection. "Where were we?" He asked the mirror, this time making the time to wipe his hot pink lipstick off. 

- 

Before he had his milk and went to bed, Alexsander wrote a note to Volcra. He knew it could never be delivered- the Little Palace had no access to mailing systems. He felt comfort picking up the pen with ink made from the extracted blood of children. 

My dearest Volcra,

I put on my pants by myself today! I peed a little bit, I was so excited. Good thing my pants are black! 

I long to be held by you, to snuggle in your big, meaty arms. To feel your claws inside my hand as we watch people enter the fold and meet their dispair. 

I have a plan, my love, to get you back. It involves Aleena Stroganoff. If I can use her powers, maybe I can do something grand for you.  I owe you it after being gone so long. Especially since my last surprise got ruined- now I have to wait to send you a hand-delivered message.

Who knows, maybe I'll be hand-delivering this message. Teehee. 

I love you my sweet perfect kind loving cheeky beautiful handsome enjoyable pleasant favourable nice exceptional important notable attractive charming pleasing delightful appealing fanciable hot tasty exquisite fair ravishing glamorous heavenly divine artistic intelligent irresistible beddable smashing cute spunky partner.

Love, Alexsander