A Feeling Of Normality [Bucky Barnes x Reader]

Part 34. Drunk Nights.

"Oh really?" Bucky asks as he watches her with his eyebrow raised, not that surprised to hear about Steve but that she knows about it.

"He told me. When he came back from God knows where he was hiding. In Wakanda, too, I guess." She takes a pause and looks at the bag in her hand, not daring to turn around to look into Bucky's beautiful blue eyes. She wasn't with Steve when he tried to drown his sorrows but she could feel the pain when he told her and still feels it, just by the thought of it. The thought of losing Bucky Barnes feeling unbearable to her. "We just knew you were important to the both of us and that we'd have to find a way to get along with each other. So he told me about your friendship. And everything after that. I guess he knew it'd help me to open up."

Bucky flinches at her words, imaging how Steve had to tell her about the day he was still the Winter Soldier and tried to kill Steve, attacking him on the streets. A shiver runs down his spine but he shakes his head to push these memories away. He's no more the Winter Soldier.

He walks closer to her until he can grab her hands and turns her around to face him. "No sad thoughts tonight, okay? I'm here now. With Steve and you." He grimaces at his own words as he realizes what they sounded like, making [Y/N] giggle and the sound of it warms his heart.

"Don't worry, I know about your 'Till the end of the line-thing. You can't talk your way out of your relationship."

Bucky sticks out his tongue as he grimaces again and then lets go of her with his right hand that wanders to her face now, caressing her cheek. Her [y/ec] stare at him, her look full of affection. He brings her head closer to place a kiss on her forehead and then turns around to walk to the fridge, taking out two new beers and handing one of it to her as soon as it's opened. "One more game before we go to bed. Who downs first, wins" Bucky says, chinking bottles.

[Y/N] chuckles, not knowing where that comes from but feels releaved about the distraction from the painful memories. Memories when James 'Bucky' Barnes wasn't with them. When he wasn't with her.
They both lift the bottles to their lips and Bucky winks at her before they start drinking, trying to win.

It's [Y/N] who finishes first, lifting up the empty bottle cheerfully, a proud expression on her face. "What have I won?" she asks when she takes Bucky's empty bottle to throw them both away but Bucky stops her hand the moment it touches his. His left arm wraps around her waist and he pulls her closer so she bumps into his chest. "You've won me" he says, their lips feeling wet from the alcohol when he connects them.

[Y/N] groans within the kiss that is quickly infensifying and feels Bucky's fingers wrap around the bottles in their hands, taking them and throwing them in the trash as her arms wrap around his neck. "You're not afraid we're going to get caught?" [Y/N] asks him as they pull back to gasp for air.

"Wilson wouldn't be able to walk down the stairs in his state" Bucky breathes against her lips before pecking on them.

"I'm afraid they already guess that something is going on between the two of us" [Y/N] answers smirking and quickly steals a kiss as well.

"Mhmm.. And what would that be?" Bucky mumbles, not willing to stop kissing her just yet. He licks over her lips with the tip of his tongue, asking for entrance and she chuckles before deepening the kiss again and opening her mouth for him.

[Y/N] feels his hands move from her waist and side to her legs where Bucky picks her up just seconds later and her legs wrap around his waist. Her right arm is wrapped around his shoulders to grab a hold of him and her left hand wanders to his hair, fingers digging into it. Bucky moans against her lips, sending a shiver down her spine and he begins to move.

He walks them back to the living room, sitting down on the couch, [Y/N] sitting on his lap. Their tongues move in rhythm in her mouth, his tongue always fighting for dominance. His hands move back from her legs up to her sides, thumbs stroking along them, making her moan against his lips once more. He groans in response before they pull back to gasp for air when [Y/N] takes off her shirt, sitting in front of Bucky only in her bra and skirt.

"No. No no no" he quickly responses and stops her right hand from throwing her piece of clothing away. "Not here. Not like this" he responses and looks deep into her [y/ec] eyes. He can see the veil in her eyes, coming from lust and desire and he's sure she can feel the bulge in his pants.

"It's okay, Buck" [Y/N] says in a rough voice, her one hand still held tightly by Bucky, her other one stroking through his hair.

"I know it is" he answers sighing. "Trust me, I know it is" he repeats and tries to keep his eyes up but gazes down to her body just for a second before he lifts it up to look into her eyes again. His cheeks are slightly reddened. His free hand cups her face, thumb stroking her cheek again. "And I want it, too. But you deserve better."

"Better than you?" [Y/N] asks softly.

"You deserve to be asked out" Bucky answers just as softly and takes her shirt, putting it back on. "And not end up in the living room where Rogers or anyone else could interrupt" he adds, smirking slightly. His right hand comes to a hold at the back of her head, holding her gently. He checks her gaze for any hint of feeling hurt or rejected or any hint of sadness and other negative emotions. He makes sure that she's fine.

"You're right, we can't do that. If we'd end up dating, it'd mean we really like each other" [Y/N] replies with a slight smirk and moves her hand through his hair, making it a complete mess now.

"Imagine if we started talking instead of staying away from me like you should."

"What a terrible thought" answers [Y/N] and watches Bucky's tiny sloppy smirk. "And it'd mean you were wrong about warning me about you."

"Hell, someone should've warned me about you instead" Bucky jokes and proudly watches [Y/N] laugh slightly. She then crawls off him and gets onto her feet, reaching her hand out to Bucky who gets up as well.

"You're right, James. It's good we kept things the way they were. Just being strangers in the same building."

Bucky chluckles slightly as they both walk up the stairs and to their rooms. They stop in front of [Y/N]'s door and Bucky puts his left arm around her waist, his hand on her back to pull her close. "Go out with me, [Y/N]" he says when they lock eyes.

[Y/N] raises her eyebrow but smirks sligthly. "I should warn you before, Barnes. I can be real danger."

Bucky chuckles but tightens his hold on her to pull her even closer. "I mean it" he murmurs against her lips. "No excuses, no intimations" he says. "Just say yes finally. I'm making a fool out of myself here."

[Y/N] chuckles again. "You were pretty hot until now actually."

Bucky groans, pressing their bodies together. "You're turning me on on purpose now, aren't you?"

"Maybe" [Y/N] smirks as she wraps her arms around his neck. "Is it working?"

"Don't act like you don't know" he mutters because he's sure she can feel the bulge that's growing again.

[Y/N] fingers begin to caress the back of his head now, pulling him closer until their lips almost touch. "We've broken the rules so many times, James. Screw them tonight" she whispers and then presses their lips together, kissing him passionately, making Bucky groan again, turning her on even more.

But Bucky breaks the kiss, lets go of [Y/N] and brings some distance between the two of them. "No matter how much I'd like that, I don't want to until we had a proper date to which, and I can't believe I even have to mention that, you have not agreed to yet."

Chuckling, [Y/N] puts her hands up in a defensive gesture. "I get it, I'm not coming near you again." She then loosens up and smiles at him. "I'd love go on a date with you, James. But why does it matter so much?"

"Because it's not just Bucky Barnes spending the night with you but all of who I am now. I'm not the man I used to be and I want things to be different. For you. For us."

"Us, mhm?" [Y/N] answers softly. "I think I like the sound of that."

"I'm sure you do, doll" Bucky chuckles as he rolls his eyes. The woman can't stay serious for once. And even though it drives him mad, he likes it. "Go to sleep now."

"You're not coming with me?"

"I'm not falling for that" he winks at her. "We're keeping our hands off of each other tonight." He then leans in and places a kiss on her cheek. "Be ready at five tomorrow" he then adds, turns around and heads to his own room, leaving [Y/N] frowning but blushing. She has a real date with Bucky Barnes.