12 ☼ suddenly

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April 2007

"Well it's been a while since we were all in this room I guess." Matt said to break the silence. Just like old times. "I bet Zack will be elated to find out he's not in on the group meeting." 

"Don't talk like any of this is normal." Ellowyn snapped, which made Jim laugh slightly. "What's so funny?!" She asked him. 

"You're you, Ells!" He said, plopping down next to her. "And you know we're us. Even if your notion of us right now, is, uh, completely fucked up at the moment. I remember you sitting on this bed ranting and raving about all the bullshit in your life." 

She smiled up at Jim, which relieved Brian to see. A smile is progress. "What was a memory of you I missed?" 

"Who do you think cut your hair after that asshole Travis cut a chunk out of it?" 

She looked confused out of her mind. "I thought I did that myself?" 

Jim shook his head. "It was my parting gift. I sent you off to get ice cream for us, and then I disappeared into history."

"Salted caramel pecan with extra chocolate syrup," She muttered. "That's your favorite. But I learned that when I was ten," She shook her head. "It's not a new memory."

Mandy had agreed to take Darien out shopping when Ellowyn said they needed to have an alone talk. They were all now in their places. Brian pacing, Matt taking the bean bag chair this time, and Jim next to her on her bed. 

A sudden thought hit her. "What happened that night when I was twelve?" She asked. The men all looked around to each other. "Well? The last thing I remember is Brian calling him something, a prick or a pervert. And then Danny attacked me, and you all never showed up again. I went up the stairs all alone, gave myself a bath, laid in bed and sobbed all night wondering where you were." 

"It's not true," Matt is the first to say. "We all tried to grab Danny off of you, to help, but we couldn't. We went after you up the stairs, made sure you got your bath and were in bed safe." 

"I slept that night. First time in 129 years," Brian nodded. "You asked me to come to bed with you. You curled up to me and I gave you a dream." 

"The beach," She said. "The fucking beach. I have that dream all the time, but you're not there anymore. You gave me it the first day we met, back in January." 

"I prayed you'd remember something, but..." He trailed off. "I don't know if it'll ever come back to you. I don't know if the memories are permanently wiped. Wait," He said suddenly. 

"What?" I tilted my head questioningly.

"I have an idea-"

Right as Brian said the words, she got a phone call under "ilejay <3" 

"Right on fucking cue!" She shouted, irritated by Red Dress by LoveHateHero playing, signifying Arin was calling. Arin and her had a... complicated relationship, so to speak. They were dating on and off, and as of now were on. She really did like Arin a lot. Probably even loved him. But now was just not the fucking time. 

She took the call anyway, 

"Hey babe! How's home?" Arin's voice chirped through the phone. She couldn't help but smile. 

"Very homey." She said, looking down to the ground. "Already wishing I was back in LA. I've been sort of busy all day, sorry I haven't gotten the chance to call." 

"It's fine. Look, make sure to call me on your way home, okay? I miss you." 

"I miss you too. Love you.  Bye Ilejay." 

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