𝐒𝐀𝐋𝐕𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍─𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐦𝐲 𝐛𝐥𝐚𝐤𝐞²

79. bardo

All of the Disciples were left unharmed. Not a single one had been hit. The wall behind them told a different story- it was covered in bullet holes- a marker of my pain. 

It was Miller who had grabbed onto me. He held me close to him, preventing me from causing anymore harm. "It's okay." He soothed as he clung onto me. "I've got you, it's okay."

It was now that my body broke down into choked sobs. My knees weakened beneath me as I turned into Miller and gripped onto him, using his body as my crutch.

The shock was finally subsiding, and I was hit full force with the complete and utter despair of losing someone.

Raven let out a small sob from somewhere behind us, and I could do nothing but hold onto Miller for dear life. 

Bellamy was dead. He was dead and I wasn't there for him. I shouldn't have let us split up. I should have been with him every step of the way. 

In that moment I hated myself. I hated myself more than I ever had in my entire life. 

The room was quiet aside from the fearful mumbles of the Disciples and my sobs that were muffled in Miller's chest. 

The love of my life was gone and I wasn't sure how I was supposed to move forward. 

Clarke answered that question for me. 

She arrived next to us, watching me with teary eyes for a moment before pulling me out of Miller's arm and into a bone crushing hug. "We do this for him." she whispered, tightening her hold slightly. "We save Octavia and Echo and we get out of here."

Another sob fell from my lips as I nodded. Despite the absolute heartbreak I was feeling, I needed to save the others. Bellamy's dead couldn't be meaningless. 

The sound of the door opening caused Clarke and I to pull apart quickly. Subconsciously I reached for my gun that had been taken from me, only to find it had been discarded on the ground.

Gabriel watched me, as if he wanted to stop me from reaching for it. So for a moment I remained still. 

A man stood at the entrance, a group of guards standing behind him. He raised his arms slightly as all of our guns pointed to him. "I'm coming in alone. Unarmed."

"Who are you?" Raven demanded, and in the brief moment they were distracted I bent down and retrieved my gun.

The man took a few slow steps into the room. "They call me The Shepherd, but you can call me Bill. You have me, now let my people go." His eyes fluttered to the bullet covered wall for a moment, a slight sense of unease covering his face. 

I gripped onto my gun just a bit tighter, trying to convince myself not to do anything too irrational. We needed to get Octavia and Echo out of here, and killing every person I saw wasn't the best idea. 

"It's okay." Clarke muttered to the other Disciples, nodding for them to get out. 

They didn't hesitate in quickly scurrying from the room, the door closing behind them. That left only us and Bill.

"I've seen you before." Clarke admitted, lowering her gun slightly. 

Bill took a few steps forward which caused all of us to raise our guns just a bit higher. "Then you must be Clarke."

Clarke stared straight ahead. "I know why the Second Dawn logo was on that burial shroud."

Bill grinned. "Burial shroud. Then you were on Nakara. That explains the smell."

I gritted my teeth, my urge to shoot this man in the head was growing with each passing second. 

Clarke seemed to be getting fed up with him as well. "How the hell are you here."