The Mistic Awards

˚ ✶ ⋆｡˚ ⁀➷ | Short Story Results: Winners

Anonymous's Canvas
By bl_AcK_zE_rO

Total: 2/10

I think your story had a very creative idea that definitely embraced some contemporary issues. Your writing style was really emotive and subtly expressive. However, I suggest you work on your grammar and use of punctuation to make your story more readable. For instance, I noticed you used ellipses (. . .) a lot, which was noticeable, especially in the blurb. Toning down on them will help you a lot - maybe rephrase your sentences or use alternative punctuation. With a bit of editing and refinement of your voice (like using active voice instead of passive voice in many instanced) I think your book will be a wonderful representation of issues faced by athletes, and mental health :D

Unrealised Horizons
By _EyeoftheStorm

Total: 7/10

I love your writing style, and apart from a couple of really minor typos, your lovely fantasy short-story collection is amazing and interactive! Apart from an improved first impression - a better, more concise blurb and neater cover - I don't see what I can tell you. I love how you showed emotion instead of just stating it blandly, I love how you took legends and references and transformed it into something whole, new and original. You have a great book!

Maybe Baby
By Roxydog05

Total: 5/10

Your story line was unique, and I had fun reading your version of the trope. I've read stories about thee new girl in town, love with a cool singer, and all of that, but your interpretation was hooking. Your good grammar made for a smooth read. If anything, I'd suggest working on improving your vocabulary and the first impression the book creates; maybe a new cover and different title? You're doing a great job with the story - keep on going!

Expect the Unexpected
By self-love123

Total: 5/10

I love the way you've brought out horror in your story. I'd suggest you try to avoid info dumps, especially at the beginning of the story, because those can make the reader vanish. I'd also suggest being careful with your tenses and your grammar. For example, "......." is actually a punctuation mark called an ellipses, and is written as ". . ." or "...": just tree dots ^_^. Stories are written in either past (words like "had", "said", "wouldn't") or present tense (words like "say" and "have"), and it's important to consider what tense you are writing those in. Keep on going!

Of The Real Monsters And Us
By f_jonas_writer

Total: 6/10

I loved reading your story. It had a fascinating story line, with the arcane queen Áine who was determined never to lose a war. Along the way, I spotted a couple of errors, which I'll try to point out here :P For one, keep plural and singular terms in mind. Say for instance, "All I remember was the faces of mommy and daddy . . ." should actually be, "All I remember were the faves of mommy and daddy". Another thing to keep in mind is your flow. Make sure your sentences can make sense on their own — even without context (i.e. you can understand what the literal meaning is, even if it talks about things that you need to context to properly understand). For example, "Penetrating her scales and flesh, Momma went crashing down" isn't very clear. What penetrated her skin? You can understand it's the dragon arrow, but, as I said, it's best to make that clear :D So, all in all, you've got a great book, and good luck for the contest!

dernière danse
By akshitaspoetry

Total: 10/10

There's not really much for me to write here, except for that your story is just stunning. My heart tore for Bette. I went on a swing of emotions while reading it — you've got such a lovely book! Great job with it! <3

Blondie's Liar
By djgraves01

Total: 5/10

Your story was incredibly intriguing right off the bat, with the immediate twist at the court trial. However, I could see some issues with grammar and the flow. Just keep in mind that while you — writers in general — do know their own story very well, readers don't when they first see it. It's best to introduce plot twists slower, to avoid confusion. Apart from that, and a bit of proofreading and checks to get rid of all possible grammatical mistakes, I think you'll have a great novel!

Love Found Me
By happysnowfeet

Total: 4/10

Your way of exploring the trope of moving on and love was great and really lovable. I loved the way you showed traditional societies and explored a couple of mental health themes as well. If anything, I'd suggest cutting down on glue words — words that aren't necessary and just slow the story down — and proofreading your story. I spotted a couple of grammatical errors here and there. For example, when adding a dialogue tag after quotation marks, the punctuation inside should either be a comma, or act as a comma. For example, '"I'm going to play," said Sasha.' is how it should be written. If you place a question or exclamation mark instead, they act as commas — '"I'm going to play!" said Sasha"', and the 'said' is not capitalised. This aside, you've got a lovely book — keep it up!

* * *

All of these books were lovely! It was amazing to get to read these. Keep on writing! <3

* * *

And now, the winners!

Some of my friends have always told me I'm like those TV show hosts that say, "The winner is . . ." and then pause for twenty movies, put up an ad break, and then give out the winners.

And I don't deny it.

Cue the suspenseful silence.

The winners!

In third place, with a score of 8/10, we have:

themysteryisme975 with I Witnessed A Murder!

In second place, we have a tie! Both with the score of 9/10, there is:

LynaForge with Sated

AND

winnie_loves_honey with Everything Under The Sun!

And, now, in first place, with a score of 10/10:

dernière danse by akshitaspoetry!

* * *

Congratulations to all the winners! ^_^ We'll DM you by the end of today or early tomorrow with your prizes!

* * *