Better Than I Know Myself

Chapter Twenty-Seven

She nods and sits down on a sofa in the lobby.

I sit there thinking on how to start, putting the words together is a bit difficult. I really want her to like me. I don't want her to think I am just a dumb selfish boy that almost got her brother killed. I don't want her to think I don't love her brother as much as he loves me. I just want her to know I will always be grateful for what he did that day.

"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to." She says as she notices how hesitant I am to speak.

"No, I want to tell you. I'm sorry, it's just I don't want you to hate me when you hear the story. I really love your brother and I know your opinion means a lot to him. I'm just a little nervous about what you're going to think about me after I tell you all of this."

She reaches out for my hand and gives it a squeeze. "If Jay loves you so much then I'm going to feel the same way, because there is something about you that just makes him head over heels in love with you."

I smile as she smiles back at me. I hope she is right. I take a deep breath and start. I tell her how we met and how at first I couldn't stand him but that changed when he stood up for me when no one else did. He made me laugh without trying. I smiled because he smiled and for the first time I let my guard down and let him in. Then, I tell her how at the time I was in a relationship, but it was a secret one because the guy wasn't out of the closet yet. The more I hung out with Jesse the more I saw I wanted more from my ex-boyfriend, but he just wasn't ready.

"So that is how the problem started then?"

I nod my head and go on to tell her how we had gotten into an argument and things kind of got ugly.

"So you broke up with him then?" She asks.

"Yes and he didn't like that very much and that was when he accused me of liking Jesse as more than a friend."

"Which you did, because then you two wouldn't be together."

I chuckle and nod my head. Then, I tell her how Hector had threatened me into breaking up with Jesse. I tell her how I tried to break up with Jesse, because I didn't want him to get hurt, but he didn't let me. He wasn't going to let someone bully him into giving me up.

"So Hector and Jesse got into a fight at school and they were suspended for three days and on the day they came back Hector showed up with a gun. He said if he couldn't have me no one could. When Hector pulled the trigger, Jesse pushed me out of the way and took the first bullet in the shoulder. Before Hector could get the second one Jesse tackled him and they fought on the floor."

I stop to take a deep breath, this is the hardest part. The memory of Jesse lying on the floor bleeding is still fresh in my mind.

"Are you okay?" Holly asks as she notices the tears running down my face.

"Yeah, it's just I'm getting the flashback of how I was there holding onto Jesse's body while we waited for the ambulance to come. Its, god, I thought he was going to die and it was going to be my fault."

She embraces me as I cry harder. I know I shouldn't cry because he came out okay, but it's just the thought that I could have lost him that day.

"It okay. I'm sorry for asking. I should have known it would be painful to retell what happened. But if it matters, I don't blame you. You told Jay plenty of times you weren't worth it but to him you are. I'm glad he fought for you because I couldn't have asked for a better brother-in-law."

I laugh as I wipe away the lingering tears. "God, he really is set on making me his husband isn't he?"

"Do you blame him? I know if I was in his shoes I wouldn't let you go either. You're a sweet guy Adrian and you are exactly what my brother needs in his life, just like you need him in yours. You two are meant to be together"

"Thank you Holly, just knowing you approve of us makes me happy and I know it makes Jesse happy as well."

"You're welcome Adrian. As long as you love my brother, I know he will love you forever and always."

"I always will. He is my goofball in tin foil and I won't give him up."

"Good," she hugs me again.

I am glad she likes me because I really like her and I just know that when she meets Jane they will get along well. "I can't wait for you to meet my best friend, Jane, you two will get along great."

"Awesome! It is going to be nice to have a friend. I'm a little nervous to be starting school somewhere new, but as long as I have you and Jay I'll be fine."

"Don't worry. We have your back and Jane will take you under her wing."

We sit there talking for a while longer before heading back to the room. We walk in and Jesse gets up and walks over to us.

"So does he pass your approval?"

"Yes, he does so don't lose him because I won't approve of anyone else."

Jesse laughs as he kisses her on the cheek and moves on to me. He wraps his arm around my waist and pulls me closer to kiss me.

"I knew she would love you."

I hold on to him, not wanting to let go. Our life is finally going to get better and Jesse is finally going to be at rest about the guilt he carried around. He can finally move on and we are going to be happy like we should be.

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