fuck it [12]

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Jade's pov:

"What the fuck am I doing?" I muttered to myself under my breath and quickly stormed out.

I entered my car and drove off. I turned up the radio to drown out my thoughts. I was mad at myself. I don't know why I kissed Y/N. I wasn't even sure how I felt about her. I didn't wanna lead her on and ruin the friendship we developed. Although at this point, we were more than just friends.

I got home and flopped straight onto my bed. I was probably overreacting over this whole situation. I mean, it was just a kiss. But what if it meant more than that to Y/N? It was our first kiss after a while. I took my phone and wrote a message to Y/N. I hesitated to send it. I ended up deleting it.

I got up for school the next morning. I was scared to encounter Y/N, but there was no way to avoid her. I walked up to my locker to see Tori and Y/N talking.

"Hi Jade! I'm hosting this-" Tori started talking.

"I don't care." I cut her off.

Y/N was standing right behind Tori. I figured I should talk to her. I pushed Tori to the side and motioned her to leave. When it was just me and Y/N left, she looked up from her phone to my face.

"Are you mad?" I asked.

"What?"

"Are you mad at me?"

"No, no, I'm not mad! Why would I be?" she said. I could understand she was lying.

"Just tell me the truth." I demanded.

"I'm not mad, I'm just.. just a little confused." she gave me a fake smile and rushed over to Tori.

Well shit. She wasn't the only one confused. That was a problem, because I wanted to make things clear with her, but how could I do that when I didn't even know what I wanted?

I decided to get her alone after class and explain every single thing I'm feeling. No matter how hard it would be to put into words.

Classes passed by quickly. I knew now was the time to find Y/N. I looked for her around the whole school. No sight of her. I kept looking in hopes of somehow running into her, but I had no luck. After some time, I gave up. I wandered over to the janitor's closet where I would've taken Y/N. To my surprise, she was in there, sitting on the floor by herself.

"Just when I thought I could get some peace." she sighed and stood up.

"Wait, don't leave." I said.

"What?"

My eyes drifted to her lips. They looked so kissable, just like they did yesterday. How am I supposed to resist that? I tried to fight the urge to kiss her... I couldn't. Next thing I know, my body was pushed up against hers, our lips touching. It was so pleasing.

I hate myself. This wasn't what I had planned. I pulled away from the kiss and ran off... again. If she wasn't mad at me before, she sure as hell will be now. Why do I keep doing this?

Y/N's pov:

Jade's lips were on mine again. Just as I started enjoying the kiss, Jade pulled away and ran off once again. What was her problem? Did she want me or not?

I left the janitor's closet and slammed the door behind me. I was starting to become annoyed with Jade. I wanted her to be straight up about her feelings. Well, maybe she's just confused. But if that's the case, then she shouldn't kiss me at all.

I got home went straight to the kitchen to eat. I didn't even greet my mom, which I always do.

"How are you, sweetheart? Is everything ok?" my mom got concerned.

"Yeah, I'm just pissed."

"What about?"

"Someone at school. No big deal." I said with a blank face.

"I have a feeling it's Jade."

"You're... right." I sighed.

"What happened?" she wondered.

"Uhm.. she kind of.. kissed me. Twice. And ran off both times."

"Oh I'm so sorry, honey. Please be careful and don't let yourself fall for her again so easily."

*a week later*

Jade has been avoiding me for a whole week. Every time she saw me, she'd turn around and walk away. It was probably because of the whole kiss and run away thing.

A few classes passed by and I didn't see Jade at all. Not even once. Though I knew for a fact she was at school. Tori told me about their conversation earlier that day. Damn, she was good at avoiding me. I wanted to find her to ask her to stop avoiding me.

I finally spotted Jade standing in the hallway. I silently walked up behind her, grabbed her wrist and dragged her into the janitor's closet.

"HEY!" she yelled.

I locked the door and stood in front of it, blocking it. Jade just leaned against the wall. She tried to look anywhere but at me.

"Stop avoiding me, Jade."

Jade stayed silent.

"Can you hear me?"

"YES I can hear you." Jade said.

"Then will you stop avoiding me?"

"No, I can't." Jade mumbled, still not looking at me.

I took her chin and turned her head to face mine.

"Why?... Why do you need to avoid me so bad?" I asked, looking straight into Jade's eyes.

"Because.." Jade was struggling to talk.

"Because what? Spit it out!"

"Because when I'm around you..." she muttered. "Fuck it."

Jade pulled me into a kiss once again. She was making it hard for me to focus on what I truly wanted. I was becoming addicted to the feeling of her lips. This time felt more intense than the last. Jade was really into it. She licked my bottom lip. I slightly opened up my mouth and immediately felt Jade's tongue touch mine. What was once a simple kiss had turned into intense making out.

Jade slipped her hand under my shirt and unclipped my bra. I stopped for a second.

"Are we really doing this? In here?" I questioned.

"Only if you want to."

I wasn't sure if it was the best idea, but I didn't care. I was way too pleased to stop. I pulled Jade back into the kiss. She firmly gripped my shoulders and pinned me against the wall. My bra was loosely hanging on my shoulders by the straps. Jade's body was pressed up against mine. She started slowly going down my neck and giving me hickeys. I couldn't help but let out a few quiet moans. I bit my lip in hopes of holding it back.

As soon as Jade was about to take my shirt off, we heard someone trying to come into the janitor's closet. We quickly stopped everything we were doing. I clipped my bra as Jade unlocked the door. Cat walked in.

"Hi Y/N! Hi Jade!" Cat spoke.

"What are you doing here?" Jade said with a mad tone to her voice.

"I thought this was a closet party." Cat muttered.

"Well it's not. Now LEAVE."

Cat frowned and left.

"Hey, don't be so mean." I said.

"She ruined the moment!"

"It's not the end of the world, Jade."

I was a bit upset as well, but we could always do it again later. Maybe it was good that Cat interrupted us. Everything happened so suddenly. Now, I was more confused about my feelings than ever.


Hi! So I tried to write something spicy but I kept cringing at myself so I had to stop and find another way to end the chapter. Also, I don't wanna end the story yet, but I feel like there might not be that many chapters left. I'll see how everything plays out. This is my first wattpad story after all, so I'm trying my best!

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