{Contest Entry} Strings

Part Five: Cupquake and Red

“I’m sorry, Mario, I just…” I paused to catch my breath and hold in my tears, “I can’t do this anymore…”

He stayed silent as we both looked down, the heavy silence clinging to the air just as tears beaded the corner of my eyes but clung to my eyelashes.

"Listen, Tiffany, I know that we used to love each other so much... Remember all the good times we had?" he tried to reason with me.

It wasn't that I didn't love him anymore, its just that I couldn't. I had reached the point where I felt no happiness or joy or love from my interactions with Red...

"I do remember. But that was a different me. And a different you. We can't go living like this forever, stuck in this eternal cycle of neverending pain. Maybe, we could try to see other people... I don't know..." I pushed back my violet hair away from my face and then let it go. I didn't want to do this. There was some part of my brain that was screaming at me to stop, but it was a dull roar among the despair that clung to my every waking moment. I felt as if I was experiencing depression... Was this what depression felt like? A feeling that you would never smile again? That nothing matters nor has it ever mattered or will matter?

"Can we just try? Let's just...go to a hotel for a few nights and see if we can't enjoy ourselves... Okay?" he suggested, shrugging as he did so.

I paused longer this time. I thought about my options. I could leave him as quickly as possible, but that would be extremely rude. I should just endure the little vacation and have some closure...

"A-alright... I'll do it."

~~~

The hotel Mario chose was a lot fancier than I had expected. The Crafter's City Hotel, equipped with automatic sliding glass doors, super fast elevators, modern art and interior decor, and even a guy playing a glass piano at the entrance.

I held onto my husband's arm for what might be the last time as we ambled through the lobby, observing each new sight and smell and touch. The receptionist at the front desk was a young man, probably no older than me, with dull brown eyes and wavy brown hair. He looked either bored or uninterested in what he was doing and appeared to wish to not be bothered. However, it was necessary that we bothered him anyway for the sake of our room and any activities we planned on doing since this hotel also offered things to do as well...apparently.

"Yes?" he asked us when we arrived at his desk.

"Um, I reserved a room under the name, 'Red Mario'," Mario answered sort of shyly.

"Wow...didn't think that was an actual reservation. Whatever. Here's your key," retorted the cranky sounding receptionist, tossing Red the key.

"Thanks...Seto," I heard Mario drag out the "thanks" as he located the man's nametag.

Seto only grunted in reply, telling us to be gone as quickly as possible so he wouldn't have to look at us. Getting the cue, I motioned Red to the elevator and we eventually made our way over there, only pausing to listen to the music being played by a bespectacled guy who looked oddly familiar, despite the circumstances. I didn't have time to investigate further as I realized we needed to get going and get settled in to our rooms.

~~~

"Should we start with just a small tour around the hotel or go into the gardens?" Red inquired of me as we ate breakfast the next morning.

"This place has gardens?! I'd call this place a resort rather than a hotel... And also, in reference to your question, it doesn't matter to me. Pick either one, I don't care."

"Tiffany, we should plan this together..." I felt him press his hand against mine, and I jerked my hand away, resting both in my lap.

"I don't care what we do, Mario. I just want to do something," I spoke carefully, looking down at my hands resting in my lap currently.

"Tiffany..." he spoke to me in that stupid tone he uses when I'm being "unreasonable" which just basically means I am annoying him.

"Don't talk to me like I'm a child, Mario," I muttered, feeling either anger or hopelessness creep into my chest.

"Tiffany, I'll be in my room..." he paused to sigh, "Come get me when you've decided."

And with that he left me alone to finish my breakfast of crappily cooked eggs, burnt pancakes, and a sour orange.

~~~

I never did go and get him. I mostly just sat in the lobby and listened to the music being played by the pianist, who's name I found out was Tyler, and wandering around on the ground floor since the entrance was placed on a balcony sort of thing. The whole layout of this entire hotel confused me...

As I trudged down through the hallways back to our room, I stopped at our door to listen if Mario was still there. I didn't hear anything, but I didn't eliminate the possibility of him being in there as I unlocked the door and went inside.

He was on the bed, his head back against the pillows and his eyes directed at the ceiling. His eyes were closed so I assumed he was probably napping. I set my purse down and the sound of all of its contents and the purse itself hitting the nightstand must have started Mario awake.

"Hey...sorry for waking you," I apologized, sliding off my shoes and lying next to him, also staring up at the ceiling as the sun began to set, painting our room a deep golden.

"Its no big deal..." he softly mumbled.

We sat in silence for a long time, but it wasn't an angry or heavy silence. It was a silence that asked, "What now?" in a not-awkward way, but in more of a rhetorical way.

This continued until he just turned on the TV and I grabbed my book and started to read. We didn't speak to each other the entire night.

When it finally came time for bed, Mario shut off the TV and I turned off the bedside lamp. We then lay in the bed, turning away from each other to our own side of the room.

I don't know why, but tears started to slide down my cheeks. I didn't know why I was crying. I just silently cried, feeling how lonely and empty the world truly is. We replace this feeling of loneliness with items or emotions or people. And I never truly understood that until I started crying in that shared bed on our supposed vacation. Mario and I were trying to fill the loneliness that was becoming more apparent and that was creating a hole in our hearts and minds. We probably would get a divorce after this and go our separate ways. Maybe we wouldn't get a divorce and just separate. That second option sounded better to me. If we wanted to marry someone else, then we'd divorce, but I don't think that will happen for a long time...

In a world where scary monsters exist, and a man who supposedly created this world we live in actually lives on this planet, we have lost meaning in our species. Whatever kind of species people are in Minecraftia, we have lost all meaning to our lives. We've had a disease known as Despair or Melancholy since birth and even the Creator himself has no idea what to do... We're all lost without a purpose... And yet, we still keep living for what seems like an eternity as our emotions and soul are eaten away into nothing. Why? Why do we let this continue? We just it here and let ourselves die unless we are rich enough to prolong the symptoms...

A beautiful world created out of nothing has become something and is now relapsing back into a meaningless nothing...

The last tear rolls down my cheek, and I stop crying. And I don't think I will cry again for a long time.