🍼Hey Angel \\ little Hyunjin🍼

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Tapping a finger against his lips, Bambam mused: "It was quite tense, honestly. He gathered all of us in the living room and I still remember how hard his hands shook when he tried to build the courage to tell us." – "H-He told a-all of you? A-At once?" – "Yeah, he did. It was kinda like a group meeting, where we all sat together and discussed things", the rapper explained and I couldn't help but feel my heart hurt. It probably was similar when Hyunjin told our group, the only difference being, I wasn't invited. Was I not part of the group? Wasn't I always there for them? "Do you want to tell me what happened?", Bambam asked calmly, a steady hand on my shoulder. His presence itself was calming, yet I still couldn't hold my tears back. At least my breathing was a bit steadier, so I wiped my cheeks again and sniffled: "One of my members is a little too. I-I walked in on him one day and found o-out about it that way. I'm his caregiver now and we hung out today, w-while I tried my hardest to avoid the others, s-so they wouldn't find out before h-he felt ready to tell everyone. W-We ran into them though when everyone rushed home due to the storm a-and they a-already knew." I choked on a sob before forcing out: "H-He had t-told them all. L-Long be-before I walked i-in on him."

My hyung bit his lip, taking in the situation. "Now you're hurt because he didn't tell you, hm?", he figured and I nodded with my face buried in my hands. "I don't know what the situation was like when he told them. Maybe one of them had walked in on him too and he decided to tell everyone right then but you weren't at the dorm?" – "B-But he co-could have told me when I-I got home", I argued. It was true that I didn't know why he had told them but he had, so why hadn't he told me? Bambam sighed: "I guess. You should talk to them though, try to find out why he told them and maybe they'll also tell you why they kept it from you. I can tell you're scared of hearing the truth but I don't think it's as bad as your assumptions and even if it is, at least you know for sure instead of just guessing. You don't have to go back just yet, we can hang out for a bit, so you can calm down and take your mind off of it till you feel ready to talk it out with them." I nodded at his offer because I really wasn't ready yet. Sure, I wouldn't get away with not talking things out but right now wasn't the time for me to do that as I didn't feel like facing my members.

I turned on the computer and showed Bambam what tracks I had been working on recently. It wasn't really working now though, rather the two of us fooling around and trying to come up with lyrics on the spot. Just having fun and giving each other a good laugh. My tears were soon forgotten and though my eyelids were swollen and my eyes felt tired, I was really enjoying the time with my best friend. It was a great distraction from everything that I didn't want to think about for the time being. We turned the music up so loud that it surely would drown out any negative thought before it could even rise to the surface and I was once again eternally grateful to have a friend like Bambam by my side, who could make me smile no matter what might be going on at the moment. Stopping the music for a second so we could actually talk to each other without having to yell, my hyung laughs: "Whatever great song you'll make out of this, I'll ever have that line in my head, no matter how meaningful the real lyrics might be. We've kinda ruined the song for me. I won't be able to take it serious." I laugh too, how will I come up with anything serious or meaningful after this? Now that it is remotely quiet between us, I almost fall out of my chair when suddenly thunder booms outside. My face drops and I stare at the other in horror. "Don't tell me you're suddenly scared of storms?", he frowns and I shake my head, getting up and quickly putting my hoodie back on. "I'm not, Jinnie is!", I state urgently, already dashing out of the studio.

Running to the exit, I realize how dark it had gotten while we were hanging out. The rain was so much stronger now than when I had come here but staying here and waiting it out wasn't really an option. Hyunjin was usually okay with storms but when he was in his headspace, he was terrified of thunder. The first storm we battled through since I became his caregiver, he hadn't slept for a single minute that night and I ended up on the couch watching cartoons till the early morning hours. He had been shaking so hard despite being in my arms, bundled up in his blanket. I had felt so helpless unable to calm him down and I had promised both of us that I'd always be there when he got scared. That promise had him crawl into my bed late at night whenever he had a nightmare or when there was a storm going on. In those situations, all that helped was his paci, blanket and being held. Depending on how bad the storm got, I wouldn't even be able to put him down for two minutes to use the bathroom and this storm was bad. I had barely made it to the next corner when my hoodie was already soaked through. This time, my t-shirt wouldn't be spared. The hood had been blown off my head pretty much instantly as I left the building. The wind was so bad that it made running hard. I was really hurrying, yet it didn't feel like I was getting anywhere. No wonder they had put out a storm warning, this certainly wasn't just a bit of rain. The water kept running into my eyes making it difficult to see as my bangs clung to my forehead. I was just glad I had gotten Jinnie home as soon as the first drops fell because he easily caught colds when his clothes get wet. Sure, it didn't exactly feel comfortable out here with my clothes sticking to me and my hands had gotten so cold, I could barely feel them but it didn't matter. All that mattered was that my baby was at home, probably scared out of his mind. Don't worry angel, daddy is coming.