martyrs & maniacs. | tbz jujae

19.

"Is it bad to say that I'm starting to be scared of him?"

Juyeon's words were said in a whisper, voice barely audible amidst Eric's chaotic singing in the karaoke room — a last minute change of plans courtesy to the amusement park being unusually crowded — and yet, Eunseo's and Hyunjae's ears perked up. The younger of the two looks at him, a brow arched.

"It's just," He struggles with what to say, how to say it, and ends up staying silent for the next couple of minutes. Juyeon can feel Hyunjae reluctantly putting a hand on his shoulder as if to say it's okay, take your time, and Juyeon sighs. Younghoon's laugh caused by Sunwoo and Eric's fight over the only microphone that isn't covered by spit registers in his mind. Juyeon gives his two friends a reassuring smile. "Nevermind." He shouldn't dump his problems on his friends in a time like this. Today should be all about Younghoon.

Eunseo only looks at him sternly. 'There's something bothering you. Spit it out."

"It's nothing serious. Forget I said anything."

"You really think I would believe that?" The girl scoffs. She grabs Juyeon's hand and drags him to the door. Juyeon has no choice but to apologise to Eric whose shoulder he accidentally bumped into on the way out, Hyunjae following behind them.

They got out of the karaoke room with the excuse of getting more food for the birthday boy, and while they do have some snacks they need to pick up from the store at the other street, Juyeon knows that food isn't the only one Eunseo will get by the time they return to their friends.

It's a silent walk at first, the two are a few steps ahead of him as they make their way to their favorite snack shop. Juyeon takes his time walking, mind already flying to Chanhee and their argument just a few hours ago. Any minute from now, his phone will be bombarded with messages and calls from his boyfriend, asking him for his whereabouts even if the younger already forbade him to go out.

It frightens him. To imagine Chanhee's face when Juyeon goes home later. Juyeon wonders if Chanhee will be more disappointed or more angry when he greets him by the door. Will he still be there later, though? Maybe Chanhee will leave and ghost him again for a week or so.

Just when Juyeon thought that Eunseo already forgot to interrogate him, the younger halts her steps to wait for him. There it is again — the fierce, questioning eyes that mirror his mother's whenever Juyeon does something wrong.

"Why were you one hour late?"

Oh. This is how she's starting the conversation?

Juyeon tries to sound unbothered. He can see Hyunjae look at him with worry beside the blonde girl. "I told you: I woke up late."

"The others might've believed you, but I've known you for years, dumbass." She rolls her eyes. "He tried to intervene, didn't he? He tried to stop you from leaving again."

"No, he didn't."

"You suck at lying."

Juyeon tries to give his friends a smile. "Younghoon-hyung is already waiting for us. Let's pick up our orders and go."

It's obvious that Eunseo still has a lot of things to say, but Juyeon went ahead and walked past her, eliciting a mixture of a curse and a whine from the younger. He can hear Hyunjae scold Eunseo for being a bit mean, only to receive a shove to the shoulder from her. And then it's silent again.

Since when did going to the store take them this long?

"Fear should never be present in any relationship." Hyunjae suddenly appears beside him. "I suggest you both talk it out; you're scared— maybe of something, or maybe of him, but whatever it is, you need to have a proper conversation with him about this unless you want things to get out of control."