𝐻𝐴𝑁𝐷 𝐼𝑁 𝐺𝐿𝑂𝑉𝐸 - 𝑝𝑎𝑡𝑟𝑖𝑐𝑘 ℎ𝑜𝑐𝑘𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑡𝑡𝑒𝑟

11 ~ 𝑐𝑎𝑡 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑚𝑜𝑢𝑠𝑒

carrie's head pounds as she swings open the rusted doors and steps into the rumbling noise of the school hallway. after the events of the past day, she's feels as though she's suffering from a sort of emotional hangover; with an aching skull and stiffness in her bones that made it extremely difficult to get out of bed this morning. she grimaces each time shoes squeak against the linoleum floor and she already feels tensed and ready to snap at anyone that gets too close or talks too loud.

it's all de ja vu; the pathway to her locker, the glances at patrick, the nervousness crawling, slowly up her spine. he doesn't acknowledge her, of course, and she makes sure to keep her staring to a minimum, simply confirming he's there and continuing on. like most days, she's set out with the aim to appear completely unaffected by him, indifferent, just to try and retain whatever remains of her pride until he will, she assumes (if he still want anything to do with her), eventually tear it down forcefully and make her feel completely vulnerable yet, inexplicably alive. with a harsh yank she pulls open her locker, no note today. a feeling similar to disappointment rises in her and she refuses to acknowledge it, stuffing her textbooks for the day into her bag.

the sensation of emptiness was not uncommon to carrie blackwood, she spent many of her school days drifting through the hallways, emotionless and on autopilot. today was no different. once patrick was out of sight, and she was seated stiffly in the plastic chairs of the science lab, the all consuming nothingness returned. it was as though her insides had been scooped out, leaving a great gaping hole inside her. she's hollow and every time she moves the sound and light and air and energy simply passes through her centre, unable to disturb her or be disturbed by her. she heaves another great sigh and the end of lesson bell tolls.

the day slips by, hours ticking away like water from a dripping tap, straight down the drain. carrie didn't see patrick again until she was moving towards her final period, english lit. it was the briefest glance but still, just for a moment, the seconds didn't feel so wasted. he was striding down the opposite side of the corridor, hands tucked into black skinny jeans and an unlit cigarette between his lips. the moment she saw him her heart leapt slightly, she would always despise him for being so dangerously attractive, and her blood began to speed up within her veins. they crossed each other in the dead centre of the busy hallway. eyes locking. she held his gaze with all the confidence she could muster, raising her eyebrows. he mirrored her before a sly grin slid onto his face and he winked. patrick winked at her as though it was the most natural thing in the world. she masked her sharp intake of breath with an eye roll and the interaction was over.

all together, patrick and carrie were probably crossing  paths for no more than 7 seconds in the corridor. yet carrie now sits, eyes fixated on the romeo and juliet extract she's supposed to be analysing, mind permanently lodged on reliving those brief moments were all she saw in a crowded room was patrick hockstetter. how fucking cliché.
and how fucking ridiculous.

only she could find her heart racing and cheeks flushing due to a brief interaction with the schools basket case. only she would spend an entire 60 minutes of lesson time ensuring she memorised patrick's sly grin and teasing wink. only she would feel relived, as though his wink was confirmation, to know that the brooding, cruel boy didn't hate her and hadn't finished his torment on her. they were going in painful circles like a game of cat and mouse. only the mouse is naive and stupid, and watches with wonder as the cat approaches, stalking toward her with teeth bared and hackles raised. she watches the cat slink closer and closer despite every bone in the mouses body screaming to run, every instinct awry with fear. and every time the mouse allows the cat to draw too close, every time the mouse runs at the last minute and every single time the mouse returns and watches as the cat peruses her once more, aware of the risk but too entranced by the cat's bloodthirsty glare to stay away.