That Sounds Fake But Okay

Chapter 3

Harry grits his teeth and jams his finger into the "down" button at least 10 times in rapid succession. This elevator needs to show up right fucking now. The sooner he can put distance between himself and the scene in the office bathroom, the better.

His mind is still spinning, not quite able to believe what he just saw—and heard. Ben and Jeff? Jeff and Ben? It doesn't make sense. It has to be a really bizarre nightmare, like the time he dreamed that he had walked in on his grandma and Frank Sinatra. It had taken months to get that visual out of his head.

"Harry!" A voice is calling down the hall. Shit. Harry punches the button a couple more times, wondering how the hell the elevator can be so slow at this time of night when no one is even using it.

"Harry!" He sees Ben rounding the corner, taking the hallway at a near run. Shit shit shit. He's been spotted. There's no escaping this confrontation now.

Ben pulls up short in front of Harry, putting his hands on his hips and bending forward a little to catch his breath. "Harry. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. This is...I'm so embarrassed." He looks as stricken as Harry probably does, his whole face flushed a bright shade of red.

Harry doesn't have a clue what to say in this moment. He's not even sure how he feels. Is he angry? Sad? Disappointed? His brain is too stunned to process anything. "It's okay," he finally stammers. "It's really...really none of my business."

The elevator dings and the doors open. Thanks a fucking lot, Harry thinks. Where were you a minute ago? For a split second, he considers jumping inside and pressing the "door close" button as fast as he can. The relative safety of a box suspended by a string eighteen floors above the ground is far more appealing than continuing the current conversation. But, it seems awfully rude after Ben has sprinted all the way across the office to talk to him. And, it'll only make things more awkward the next time they see each other.

"No, but it is...your business" Ben is saying, shaking his head. "We were talking, you know? I feel like such an asshole. You shouldn't have found out this way."

Harry swallows hard. His mouth and throat feel as dry as a bone. "I just feel...kind of stupid, you know? Like, how did I not see this? I didn't see this at all. How long has it been going on?" He knows he has no right to ask, but the question just tumbles out.

Even as he's speaking the words, Harry's mind is a whirlwind of flashbacks and realizations. How Ben seemed to run hot and cold from day to day. How he wanted to go as far away from the office as possible for a lunch date. How he looked so awkward outside Jeff's office. How Jeff had been lightning quick to let Louis' management team know that Harry wasn't involved with anyone.

"It's been...it's been going on for a while," Ben admits. "But we've been trying to end it. I mean, he has a girlfriend. I don't know if it's ever going to work out, but..." his face crumples a bit, "...I just keep going back to him, Harry."

Well, this is certainly unexpected. Harry would never have guessed that Ben and Jeff were sleeping together, and he certainly would never have guessed that it was anything with this level of emotional attachment. Ben looks truly upset. Harry reaches out to pat him on the shoulder and realizes that it's the first time they've ever actually touched.

"I'm so sorry," Ben repeats. "I thought that...maybe if I tried seeing someone new I could forget about Jeff and move on. And then, when I found out you were dating Louis Tomlinson, I knew you only saw me as a friend, and I just..."

Guilt hits Harry like a swift kick to the gut. Ben has no idea that his relationship with Louis isn't real. The only person who could have told him is Jeff—and, well, that clearly wasn't going to happen, Harry realizes now. He has no right to expect any kind of loyalty from Ben. He doesn't even deserve the explanation he's currently getting.