Power and Lies

Nine

"You're beautiful," John whispered, leaning into her once more. He had told her many times already, but each time brought a warmth to her. Lee had only called her beautiful when he wanted her to fulfill wifely duties, something she was not particularly fond of. He was too busy, too brutish. He never gave her tenderness in the bedroom or anywhere else, and he certainly never called her beautiful where a room full of people could hear. She wondered if he would be the same sober or if he would be afraid to say it, afraid to expose a weakness to anyone. She was learning quickly there were enemies everywhere, whether they wore the same title as you or not.

She did not know if Tommy had told John about what happened in the stables, or if he would. She hoped not, it was not something she needed people knowing about. She wanted to carry the blood on her hands silently. There was no one man in the building who had clean hands, and she was happy for that. None could judge her, not that she cared. He had gotten what he deserved, but she wondered what John would have done if he had seen her instead of Tommy. Tommy with his calculating eyes and cold body language. She glanced at him, quickly, for she did not want Grace to see her and marveled at him. His facial features were beautiful, and she found herself mentally picturing herself tracing his cheeks, planting small kisses as her fingers trailed on down his body. The attraction was there from the start, she knew that now. The very first night when she had stood out in front of her house and he had asked if she was a whore and fear had rooted her to the ground- it had started then. He lit a fire in the dark parts of herself and fanned the flames, daring her to burn things. Be destructive he seemed to whisper to her. She wanted to be. She wanted to be wild and out of control like the girls she would see with their bobbed hair and jeweled and draped dresses. She wanted something she did not think she could ever have, but there was something in him that told her to have it all. Nothing could stop her anymore. She was no longer caged.

"You want to go back to yours?" John's mumbled voice snapped her from fantasy in her mind and she smiled at him but lightly shook her head. He was far too drunk to go anywhere, and besides, she was tired.

"Another time," She promised him. The answer seemed to please him and he kissed her suddenly. It was not like her early morning kisses, this was sloppy and awful, but she could tell it came from a good place so she allowed it. "I think I am going home now," She said when he finally backed away. He did not say anything, simply nodded and laid his head down on the bar. John Shelby was done for the night. She pushed her glass back further on the bar and made her way towards the door.

She had not realized just how terribly late it was. The moon was full and bright. Her soul felt lighter somehow tonight. It should feel terribly burdened, but she could not find it in herself to pity her victim. Men who took freedoms with women who did not wish for it held no warm part of her heart.

She was halfway home when she became acutely aware of the footsteps behind her. Normally she would've picked up on them sooner but the alcohol had caused a slight stupor in her mind. "That you Tommy?" She called out, knowing Tommy would be the only one sober enough to walk with that steadiness. When there was no answer she stopped walking and turned around, ready to confront him about how creepy it was to just follow her without saying anything. But it was not Tommy's cold eyes staring at her in the night air. These were eyes she did not recognize.

"Who the fuck are you?" She spat. She was defenseless, she could only hope the person would be mildly intimidated by her attitude and opt out of commiting sin in the moonlight. "I said who the fuck are you?"

He was not a large man in height or weight, but there was an anger burning within him she could practically see. "You killed my brother." Was all he said and her breath left her. She had been riding a high, unable to see there could be retribution. She was foolish to believe she could murder a man and have no consequences.