Grandpa

Doug the Vampire Hunter

I was waiting outside when I heard Doug say "Vampire!" Sarah then ran out the door with Doug following behind her.

~~~

"This episode is gonna be awesome," Benny said as the four of us were in the van.

"This is bad," Ethan argued.

"Uh, hey, let's not say things we can't take back," Rory said.

"There's an audio feed," Benny stated.

"Okay, Makowski, we're going live with this, but it better be ratings gold. We're interrupting Biggest, Bravest Babies!"

"This is huge, Jerry. The world's first televised vampire kill. This bloodsucker's dead. Again!"

"Guys. We gotta do something," Benny said worriedly.

"Do you think Doug would... kill Sarah?" I asked nervously.

"Even if he doesn't, the whole world's gonna know she's a vampire. This town will be crawling with guys like Doug," Ethan reasoned. "Plus, spooky government scientists."

"Well, what do we do? Doug's our hero, and I don't want to use any of my arcane power to rip his soul from his mortal form."

"Yeah, good thing you're bad at magic," Rory and I said.

"Doug wants a show about vampires, we'll give him one," Ethan got an idea.

~~~

"This is by far the weakest fight preparation in the history of showdowns," Benny said as I did his makeup.

"We're not gonna fight Doug. He needs to think he was wrong about what he saw, so we're gonna put on a show like something out of those Dusk novels," Ethan explained.

I looked over. "There's Sarah." I quickly looked back at Benny. "Go get into position," I said when I finished.

"Hey," Ethan approached Sarah.

"I'd laugh at you if I didn't want to bite someone's face off," Sarah snapped.

"Here. Put these on," I handed her her costume.

"I have my own, thanks," she held up the fake teeth.

"They need to be fake," Ethan insisted.

"Trust me," I finished. "And this," I handed her a pink trench coat.

"Is this some sort of blanket?" Sarah asked.

"With sleeves," I smiled fakely. "And here's the tiara too."

"Ethan, what are we doing?" Sarah asked.

"What geeks do best. Live action role-playing," I said as Ethan walked off.

"You've done this before?" Sarah squinted at me.

"Oh, I'm going to be waiting in the vane. Benny thought it would be safer and Ethan agreed. But, I've done Leia for them once or twice."

~~~

"I've tracked down the nefarious throat-muncher into this abandoned warehouse. Clearly ground zero for local vampire activity. Well, sorry, bats, but you're not the only bird in town anymore."

There was a howl and the camera looked up. Ethan was dressed as a werewolf, and was stomping toward Doug.

"Holy cow! A werewolf!" Doug exclaimed. He looked at his crossbow. "Frozen!"

"Well done, Benny," I muttered.

"You trespass, human, on ground that is not yours," Ethan growled.