Lonely But Eventually Guided

Part two

It's the weekend and I couldn't be happier but I couldn't leave my house because I was just to scared to face the world. All I did that weekend was listen to music and think about all those things Jessica said. "Do I really have a chance with him, am I really fat and ugly". I honestly didn't know, I saw myself as a whole different person after that day.

I walked into my bathroom when no one was home and brought my computer with me. I looked up a bunch of videos on how to self harm. I finally found a video on how to cut. So nervously I get a razor blade and slide it across my wrist several times repeatedly until I saw blood. I was so disappointed in myself but I just couldn't think of a better way to express my feelings especially since I have no friends.

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It's Monday my favorite day (Says sarcastically). I come in with bracelets up and down my arms. Everyone was looking at me but I just could care less at this point. Jessica sits down next to me and says "looks like you were busy last night" while looking at my bracelets and my scars peeking out. I just walked away.

So now it's lunch and of course I'm sitting by myself. But then I see Britney and Samantha walk by me and of course since there popular and friends with Jessica I automatically expected the worst. But they started talking to me saying things like "I have a strange feeling whats under those bracelets" and "we are here for you, we will never let this happen to you again". I felt so good after that lunch period because now I knew that I actually had people to talk to.

It's Friday night and I'm home again but it didn't matter to me because I had a great week full of friendship. An hour later Britney texted me and said " hey Alex me and Samantha are going to the movies tomorrow do you wanna come with"? I answered quickly saying "yes I would love that".

Now it's Saturday and Britney and Samantha are in the car and we're heading to the movies. They were making me laugh so hard and I just felt amazing after that day.

I went home with a huge smile on my face telling my mom and dad about everything we did.

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It was Monday and I couldn't wait to go to school,surprisingly. I had a great day. Daniel started to talk to me more. Britney and Samantha promised they would talk to him but I just didn't actually think it would happen,but they did. We were in homeroom and he smiled at me when I looked towards him and in chemistry we got in trouble for laughing and talking to much. I couldn't wait to thank Britney and Sam.

I go home with not even a little urge
to cut. It was an amazing feeling to be happy. All I did was think about Daniel, dream about Daniel,and talk about Daniel.